Memories of a Girl: Link
by TsundereMe
Summary: Memories: They hold the very things we love and the very things we despise. Well, for this girl, Rin Kagamine, her memories are the link, the link that ties everyone and everything, including this story together. 1st part of the Memories Series! RinxLen
1. Prologue

**A/N: **Here I go! My first story! Wish me luck!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Vocaloid! All rights go to Crypton, Yamaha, Internet Co. Ltd.! The only things I do own are my OC's

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><p><strong>Prologue<strong>

Memories: They hold the very things we treasure and the very things we despise. Memories can also serve as the link that ties events, people, and times together. A number of events occurred during a bright, summery afternoon of September, during the town of Kaizo's Hanabi Festival that would give certain individuals memories that would forever change their lives.

First of all, a slightly pudgy boy with chestnut hair fell off of the sky only to meet with the clearest of blue eyes.

Next, an exuberant girl met up with her best friends not knowing she would make a promise that would last a lifetime.

Then a shy girl finds herself in solitude for the first time in her life, but comes to realize she is never truly alone.

After that, a girl, scared of her surroundings, finds comfort and love in a warm smile, never truly realizing it's the smile of his "twin".

And two twins, tired of the feeling of abandonment, finally find an individual who will always be with them.

And all the while, a young boy is contemplating his feelings about the girl he would come to love.

All very different events, very different memories belonging to very different people, which happened during that predestined day of the Hanabi Festival. But these events, no matter how far off they are, all have two common factors: the Hanabi Festival, a day of reminiscence and memories, and a girl, radiating with innocence, named Rin Kagamine.

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><p><strong>AN: **Okay, there's my first chapter! Sorry if it isn't much but I have major plans for this story. This is just a prologue anyway. Tell me what you think and criticism and advice is very much welcome to this newbie! Please R&R!


	2. Broken

**A/N: **My story seems so pathetic compared to all the other authors'. But that's expected for a newbie, ne? Anyway, here's when the story really starts! Hope you enjoy!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Vocaloid! I can't even speak Japanese!

**Summary: **Memories: They hold the very things we love and the very things we despise. Well, for this girl, Rin Kagamine, her memories are the link, the link that ties everyone and everything, including this story together. First part of the Memories Series! RinxLen

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><p><strong>Chapter 1: Broken<strong>

**(Rin's POV)**

"C_LASH!"_

I let out an exasperated sigh before I trudge over to the scene of the crime. Just as I expected, I see the same gray coat, the color of melancholy, of the same stray cat that lingers in my shabby little apartment every morning. I tiredly pet his head before watching him scurry away to unknown places far from my apartment, leaving me alone to clean up his mess.

Personally, I don't mind the little stray because even though he may cause a ruckus time and time again and doesn't even stay to watch the aftermath, he still provides good company. After all, besides him, the closest thing I have to acquaintances is my landlord, Teto. Even though Teto can engage in conversation for hours, you can't help but long for a little change. That's why I don't mind the cat's company. He provides a change from the exuberant Teto. So as I bend down to look at the damage, I smile to myself knowingly, thanking the cat for its daily visits.

What I see before me, the object the cat has mistaken for its prey, is a picture frame holding a somewhat weary picture of six kids, running around an aging maple tree without a care in the world. There are vivid decorations beyond the tree, signifying festivities soon to be celebrated. "The Hanabi Festival" I whisper to myself as if I were explaining the picture to another.

I take a closer look at the picture, totally in a trance by it, ignoring the shattered glass on the floor. As I further inspect it beyond the creases and contours the broken glass made, I see familiar faces of the kids depicted in the picture all laughing in their fun and games.

Len Kagamine. The mop of golden blond hair strikes out along with his breathtakingly boyish smile. He is running, indulging in the whims of childhood as a normal 6 year old would do. Wearing a simple green T shirt and loose shorts, he appears truly ecstatic, excited for the festivities.

Kaito Shion. The boy next to Len, same age, same mop of unruly hair, only this time in a shade on sapphire blue. Instead of looking like a ray of sunshine like Len, instead the boy has a look of pure terror on his face as if he was being chased by a predator.

Meiko Sakime. She could be considered as Kaito's "predator" the entity Kaito is running from, which is wise considering how she looks. A scowl is etched on her face and pure rage was radiating off of her, her chocolate hair blazing, making her an opponent to fear. She is running after Kaito and Len, getting ready to beat them to a pulp for most likely an idiotic comment leaked from Kaito's mouth.

Luka Megurine. The other girl in the picture, sitting serenely on the maple tree. Her posture and smile are poised, making it difficult to believe at that time, the girl was just six. Her flowwing pink hair is tied in an intricate braid, further implying her maturity.

Gakupo Kamui. The boy sitting across from Luka. He is wearing his long violet hair, exotic for a boy, in a loose ponytail as he chats lie leisurely with Luka. His carefree nature is expressed through the way he sits, sprawled on the floor, contrasting him with the poised Luka. But judging from the familiarity, the two have known each other for a while.

Rin Kagamine. Her flaxen hair reflects in the sun giving her a sense of joy. Her aquamarine eyes glow happily, showing the girl's innocence. And her smile is one of pure joy radiating perfectly the feeling of jubilee the holidays bring. She is the final girl in the picture, the girl who is supposed to be me.

Even thought that girl in the picture is a perfect replica of myself 10 years ago, I fail to spot a similarity between her and myself, my current self. Her flaxen hair shines in the sun yet mine always fail to glow. Her eyes are an aquamarine doorway to pure innocence yet all that can be seen in my eyes are a mix of gray and blue resembling a stormy sea of melancholy. And her smile is considered happiness personified, yet my own looks weary, looking happy enough to fool others of my disposition, yet not happy enough to fool myself.

My appearance is more like the appearance of that girl after being washed away and battered by the forces of the harsh reality. And for that reason, I can relate more to the broken frame rather my old self. Both of us are just shells of the wholesome beings that preceded us after being crushed by our destroyers, in the frame's case, the cat, and in my case, reality. Both of us also have difficulty fulfilling the roles we were given. For the frame, it is difficult to see the happiness of the scene past the broken creases of the glass, the job the frame was tasked for. For me, it is difficult to carry on living life, the task humans were assigned. Both of us are broken and as you can see, life is hard when you are broken.

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><p>As I was stuck reminiscing on the past in a trance like state, time flew by. A shrill warning from Teto brought me crashing back to reality.<p>

"Rinners! You'll be late, hun!"

Immediately, I dropped the frame, not bothering to pick up the broken pieces. I swiftly put on my uniform, not bothering to put much else. I hear that girls obsess constantly on what they wear, but what point is there for me to? I have no one to meet. So I just stick to the basic white long sleeved blazer, navy coat, blue knee length plaid skirt, navy stockings, the matching blue tie, Mary Jane's, and my signature white bow.

After a farewell towards Teto, I was off to my school, the prestigious Seicho High School. It's a pretty great school considering that my town is in the countryside of Japan. Right now, I'm at the start of my second trimester of my first year of high school. As I take a look at the bare trees shivering through the December air, I think back to the Hanabi Festival.

The Hanabi Festival just passed by this September and since our second and third years take care of the event, right now the school is still going through the aftermath. Third and second years, along with the teachers, are still relishing the moment, while us first years are already preparing for the next festival. You see, this festival is extremely important to our minute town. During the legendary festival, people from all over Japan gather to our town just for the legendary festivities. The fireworks, the parade, the stalls: the people just love it. And the citizens of Kaizo need the festival. It brings over a fourth of the town's profits and need it to keep the town running. The festival is so important that there are classes devoted on preparing for it.

So while my train of thought travels freely yet again, I find myself in front of the school gates. I immediately prepare for what comes next, the inevitable, to come. As the gates open to let me in, I can't help but comparing the school gates as the gate to hell. As usual, I am faced with a barrage of glares coming from my fellow students, but in response, I give a feeble smile to show respect.

"Good Morni-" I start to mutter but am cut off. It's right then I see her, past the sea of glares and rumors floating about. Her distinctive gold hair adorned in a singular ponytail. Her uniform accesorized to the maximum to show her superiority. Her figure, so fit and perfect, boys would die for her. Neru Akita.

"Why do you even bother to talk to us?" Neru spits out as if she is disgusted by the fact she is talking to me, Rin Kagamine, the girl hated by everyone.

"I'm sorry, Akita-san. I'll take my leave," I manage to get the statement out, turning my head down, before being cut off again this time by a snowball made by the fresh snow on our feet. Soon, more and more snowballs head my way while I am stuck paralyzed as the whole student body torments me.

I look up just as I see Neru wipe her hands of snow concealing the fact that she threw the first that would start this chain reaction. "Oops," Neru giggles as she turns her back to me. More snowballs head my way as I am unable to do a thing besides watch Neru's retreating form.

Five other silhouettes join her figure. With my vision blurred by the snow, I have a hard time recognizing them but when I do, nostalgia and a sense of familiarity surges through me as I recognize their faces. His boyish smile. Her chocolate locks. His mop of blue hair. Her intricate pink braid. His loose violet ponytail.

Despite the piercing snowballs, I offer a smile of welcoming to them only achieving snickers and smirks in response. And even though right now they are mocking me, laughing at me, joining in my tormenting, I can't help but remember that photo and the good memories in it where the six of us were all laughing together at all of our fun and games. But I guess my torment is their new fun and games, their source of enjoyment, that causes them to laugh merrily. And as long as they continue to laugh, I am willing to oblige to the torment just so I can see them radiating with happiness, happiness I stole years ago. It only serves as my punishment to what I had done to them before that caused them to turn from me and lose their mirth they had as children. So as long as that mirth resurfaces with the sight of me in pain, I am willing to please them even if it comes to my expense.

So as the snowballs cease as classes are soon to start, I still offer them my smile. And as they walk away, completely ignoring me, my smile never falters. It's only when they are out of sight that I start to break down once again. Tears fall off my face and I felt as if I was suffocating. I lay crouched on the floor until I have enough sense to continue. I have a hard time getting but that is expected. Because as I said before, life is hard when you are broken. Well, life is even harder when you are broken with no chance of getting fixed.

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><p><strong>AN: **Well there it was, my first real chapter. Tell me anything I can do to improve my story and please R&R. Tooooooootles~

**P.S. **By the way, I just want to clear up that I am using the Japanese school system. There are only three years of high school and Rin is in her first. It also has three trimesters which take place during the year with the first starting in April. Right now, Rin is in her second trimester which is between September and December. Wrote this just to make things clear!


	3. Push

**A/N: **Hey y'all! Had a mild case of writers block but now I'm back and ready to roll!

Thank You to _**Tragic Universe, RetirnoftheWings, Pomegranada,**_ **_MaxJacksonCullengirl, and Campanella _**for their reviews. Trust me, you have no idea how happy you guys made me. You gave me motivation to write this next chapter!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Vocaloid! If I did, they'd be bankrupt by now.

**Summary: **Memories: They hold the very things we love and the very things we despise. Well, for this girl, Rin Kagamine, her memories are the link, the link that ties everyone and everything, including this story together. First part of the Memories Series! RinxLen

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><p><strong>Chapter 2: Push<br>**

**(Rin's POV)**

"Gosh Rin. Again?"The nurse, Haku, worriedly inquired. Anxiety was etched on her face and her crimson eyes surveyed my wet clothes and bruises, all caused by the pelting snowballs.

All I could do is to give her a smile of reassurance, hiding my recently shed tears. I wouldn't want her worrying about me as much as she already does, past the obligation for care a school nurse swears to her children. But because of my near daily visits caused by the torment of my peers, I guess I failed as she became fond of me. Sympathizes for me, at the very least. But to me, that's a problem as all I am to her is a burden, taking advantage of her good judgment in treating me, when truly, there is no point as the same thing will happen again the next day. And the next say. And the next. And I won't object to it.

She gives off a tired sigh before calling me over. After stopping the swelling of my bruises, she sent me away to change my dripping clothes. I wouldn't have to worry about being late to class as unfortunately, all my teachers are accustomed to it as well. But that is nothing but trouble for me as there will be more people worrying for me in my life for me to track. And I can't let any of them get in too far, can't let them take action of their worries. Because if they do, they would not only risk the chance of getting shunned themselves, they would also disturb my lifelong punishment, disturb the cycle that has been decided 3 years ago.

3 years ago. 3 years ago, I lost everything. 3 years ago, I lost my friends, family, all my loved ones. 3 years ago, the torment started and all the shunning began. 3 years ago, I went spiraling down, to the deepest pits of hell with no chance of seeing light in this never ending nightmare. 3 years ago, everything I worked for, stacked up to that point, toppled over, like a long bed of dominoes craftily prepared by a skillful master. Like the dominoes, my life toppled over one by one, destroying every aspect of my life, until it finally stopped leaving me in a dead end. And all it took to forever scar my life was a single push.

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><p>As I pull myself to take another step in the barren hallway, I see him. His chestnut hair is perfectly combed giving him an edge of maturity that makes him stand out from the other boys in the school. His soft green eyes, the color of smooth jade, manage to make him look cold yet warm at the same time. His uniform, while simple, is perfectly adorned, with barely any crease in sight. In, plain sight, my mind tells me he is a total stranger yet my heart radiates with warmth, as if it recognizes him. And apparently, he feels the same, judging by the confusion and the sudden recognition clouding his eyes.<p>

"Rin.." he whispers out before his eyes get as wide as saucers, and scurries away. I, for whatever reason, am stuck dumbfounded by the encounter.

Questions rang all over my head. _Who was he? How does he know me? Why did he run?_ I could probably guess the answers of last two questions. I'm Rin Kagamine. The most hated kid in the entire school. Students, old and new are taught to shun me. He ran to avoid being seen with me, to avoid alienation from his peers.

But the question of who he was still rang in my head. I've never seen him before and that's something in the town of Kaizo, where everybody knows eachother, for better or for worse. And for some reason, I fail to group this total stranger with all my other tormentors. He makes me feel... homely. The feeling I've lost ever since I lost my loved ones. And I long for the feeling.

Pushing the mysterious boy out of my mind for the moment, I continue my routine trying to reach homeroom before the horrid bell rings. I open the door, and receive the usual onslaught of snickers and whispers, as I walk to my seat, bowing to Kiyoteru-sensei, offering words of apology. Sensei just nods knowingly, most likely pitying me and my predicament deep inside his very calm collected head.

I trudge to my desk, feigning happiness and excitement when truly, all that bubbles inside me is longing and loneliness. One look at him, and that feeling intensifies, as if my head was a volcano and the longing its destructive lava ready to burst to signal my insanity and outrage. I want to call desperately at him, make him wrap his arms, now larger than they were as kids, around my frail body and whisper words of soothing and encouragement. I want to stare right into his sapphire blue orbs and see the innocence he had a a kid, not the indifference I spot lingering in them now. I want to coax the boyish grin from his face rather than the frown that occupies that area. But most of all, I want to be by his side, Len's side.

But I know that is impossible. More or less, Neru, who now sits smugly next to Len, has replaced me from his life. From all of their lives actually. She now serves as the friend who will be there whenever they are lonely. She would protect them from the harsh reality of life. She would keep them away from me, away from their dementor, and safe of the trouble that comes with me. And that's why even though Neru is the one who is ultimately pushing me away from them, I still have much gratitude aimed towards her for being able to enact the job I was forced to abandon. And for that, I owe her too, just like the rest of them. Len, Luka, Meiko, Kaito, Gakupo, and now Neru too. I owe them all my life just so I can be able to receive just some repentance.

After homeroom finished, I find myself tumbling outside of the classroom, ready to embark the painful journey to my next class. I face insults from passing students, disgusting hoots from the obnoxious senior boys, and quiet glares from their equally frightening girls. Along the way, I see a them, flocked around Neru's locker. Although I lost all right to see them years ago, I still check up on them just to keep track of them even though every time I do leads to chaos. Maybe it's a habit I kept from childhood. Maybe it's my refusal to let go of the past. I don't know. But whatever the reason, I find myself waddling in their direction, hoping to get a discreet hello in.

As soon as I got their though, those who actually bothered to look at me gave me a look of indifference as if my existence was not worth noting. And before can peep a single word, I am shoved brutally to the floor. I look up to the offender, and see her chocolate hair and eyes, blazing as usual, burning into my soul. I see her, the girl I used to affectionately call Meimei who would call me Rinrin with just as much affection, in response. But as I now look up, I see no affection. I see nothing but brutality.

As they take off, having enough of my presence, they offer no goodbye. I wouldn't expect one. As I remain in floor in agony, I think of why my darling Meimei would even bother to push me. Usually, all they offer is a cold shoulder freezing me in response, or a biting remark that would tear up my soul, after which I would leave. But today why would they waste the physical exertion to shove me out of the way? Just to see me in pain? Maybe. Or maybe they recognize the dead end in my life as well. Maybe they recognize that with every other push, what is left in my life slowly collapses as well. Like the dominoes. Maybe they see the significance of the wall that is blocking me from moving on in my life and enjoy watching me get rammed against that wall of oppression. Maybe. But I know from experience that one push is all it takes to make something much, much worse.

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><p>The day went on as usual, with me on the receiving end of abuse and hatred. I kept away from the cafeteria during lunch or any other public place in a plea to avoid my former friends, and I was still unable to spot the mysterious lad from a while ago. So I found myself drifting, drifting in school, drifting home, drifting in my dreams, drifting to the depths of tomorrow.<p>

Again, the next day went on as my routine planned it. I saw the stray cat wandering. I said my farewells to Teto. I watched hell's gates open. I received a facefull of snowballs in welcome. I visited the nurse for a change of clothing. I genuinely thought the day was going to be like every other day. But when I wandered into my homeroom without being greeted by menacing looks, and instead cheerful whispers, I knew today was out of the ordinary. Just then Kiyoteru-sensei spoke up, announcing in his rich voice,

"Class, we have two new transfer students today" Sqeals from excited girls were heard. My heart raced. Judging things, it looks like I'll be having more tormentors as surely these new kids will be taught to hate me as well. Fear occupies most of my mind. Even though it has occurred for years now, i still am not fond of gaining new enemies. But still, it was unusual for a student to transfer to our school at this time. It was unusual for a transfer to come to our school, period. So because of this, genuine curiosity mixed with my fear. " You may come in now." Sensei ushered toward the door which must be hiding the two new students.

In came a pair of students, a boy and a girl, looking very similar, probably siblings, or maybe even twins. They both had distinguishable teal hair, the boy wearing it uncombed on his head while the girl had her long hair tied in twintails. The two were gorgeous, the type of teens who could easily climb the popularity pyramid and score any partner. The boy was very handsome, with a fit body under his tight fitting uniform, and a mischievous smile on his face. The girl had the beauty of a goddess, with long flexible legs, delicate teal eyes, and a warm smile that could easily make boys beg.

"Let me introduce to you-" before Kiyoteru-sensei was finished, a shrill yell disrupted him.

"Rinny!" The goddess like girl yelled out. And it would be moments later when I would realize that the girl called my name. But at that moment, I felt a little push inside my heartstrings. Maybe it was shock from the recognition. Maybe it was fear from the attention, and shunning I would later receive. I again don't know. But still, I felt a push inside me. And as I said before, a single push, no matter where you feel it can make things much, much worse. But also, a single push is all it takes to start making things better again, to rebuild all the damage. Whether that push meant what; it's still too early to tell.

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><p><strong>AN: **OMG! I finally finished. This took a longer time to write cuz my writer's block came back at the most random times! But thank God your reviews pulled me out of there. It's kind of rushed cuz I want to get this out as fast as possible for you guys so sorry if it sounded repetitive. So is anyone noticing a theme, yet? Tell me in your reviews. Anyway,guess who the two new characters are. It's pretty obvious. And guess who the mysterious boy is, if you want. (but it's useless since he's an OC...) But as of now, my main cast in introduced! Hurray!

**P.S. **If any of you want the answers as to what happened to Rin 3 years ago or during the Hanabi Festival when they were 6, you are going to have to wait a WHILE cuz let me remind you this is a SERIES! This story (Link) will be finished with tons of unanswered questions you are going to have to wait to be answered in the next (5) stories. So if you are unwilling to wait, PM me and I'll give you some answers, but not enough to spoil the whole story.


	4. Familiar

**A/N: **I'm baaaaack! I'm seriously procrastinating in my homework writing this now but, oh well! I'm just really excited to get my new characters in! Ahhhhhh!

Thank You to _**Tragic Universe, Campanella, Dancer028, Pomegranata, ReturnoftheWings ,and**_ **_MaxJacksonCullengirl _**for their reviews. I thank you so much for encouraging me to do this! (and sorry for not responding to all of you yet, I had the urge to write and didn't want to lose it.)

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Vocaloid!

Also, Campamella, you addressed a (extremely) good point in the review you sent me. To answer the question, The whole series (_Memory of a Girl_) is Rin's story thus she is the main character. BUT, each story will have a different protagonist on which the story is told in her Point of View. And most likely, the only other point of view included in each story is the protagonist's love interest. For example, _Link_ is told in Rin's and eventually Len's POV. This way, more romance and friendships will occur in the ensemble I set up. Also, you get to hear the thoughts of these characters, listen to what they experienced, see how they see things and these factors will answer the story's main questions (including, yes, what happened three years ago). So, as this story is over, you'll see less of Rin and Len, but they are still the MAIN characters. You'll still see their romance develop in the future stories. Their story isn't over once their part of the fanfic is over. Trust me! But still, I hope you guys are open minded enough to welcome the new protagonists in the next story. (Actually, all the future protagonists have been introduced, more or less *hin**hint*) If you want the titles of the next stories, look in my profile. I'm really wary of listing the protagonists of each story cuz that could give spoilers. But once again, if you are curious, just PM me. And I hope you all stay with me until the final story!

**Summary: **Memories: They hold the very things we love and the very things we despise. Well, for this girl, Rin Kagamine, her memories are the link, the link that ties everyone and everything, including this story together. First part of the **Memories Series**! RinxLen (Just to remind y'all *giggle*)

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><p><strong>Chapter 3: Familiar<br>**

**(Rin's POV)**

I sit numbly as the words pass by me. That single word uttered by that girl, is just... unfamiliar to me. The affection and delight highlighting the words are also unfamiliar, and I'm not sure where her affection is targeted to. It takes a long while, under a complete moment of pure silence for me to comprehend the words that slipped past her mouth. _Rinny._

Rinny. And that's when it hits me. _She called out my name! My childhood nickname!_ But she couldn't have, could she? The way she announced it, with such mirth radiating in her delicate voice as she called me by the nickname my loved ones called me as a child. During these times, it's near impossible to call out the name of Rin Kagamine, who is universally despised, with such ectasy and without faltering at all or having devious master plan in your mind. But the mysterious girl was able to do so with such compassion and even an excited smile on her face. The whole situation is just unfamiliar to me.

"Rinny, is that you?" the girl inquired gleefully suddenly appearing in front of my face which is frozen with shock, trying to comprehend even just a bit of what is going on around me.

The boy soon joined what I guess was his twin and just as excitedly commented, "I think it is, sis!"

It was at this moment, I have enough sense to survey my surroundings. Past the two mysterious tealettes with their animated smiles in front of me, I see the students in my class showing faces of disbelief, irritation, and inquiry. Among the students I spot Len and Neru, who are the only ones I recognize in my homeroom, both wearing masks of shock on their faces. Neru looks more than annoyed, annoyed at the attention I received, and at this moment most likely pondering how an individual, let alone two gorgeous individuals, can speak to me with such exuberance. Len on the other hand, just looks on, stares at me with disbelief, with the sound of my forgotten childhood name exclusive to my loved ones, piquing his interest. He doesn't stare at me straight in the eye, just stares at me with a blank look, most likely going through an unfortunate flashback to our childhood. After the feeling of shock sinks in, I grow suddenly meek and afraid, tired of the attention I was getting and afraid what the intentions of the two twins have with me.

Sensei, who was just looking on as well, curious and worried about my new "acquaintances" and a little shellshocked by the little outburst, regains his senses, as he clears his throat demanding the class's attention. He continues on, "As I was saying, class this is Hatsune Miku-san and Hatsune Mikuo-kun. Please welcome them to Kaizo" Unconvincing cheers were his response from those out of the paralysis the shock gave us. And I guess that was expected as conversing with Rin Kagamine is already an unaccepted and unfamiliar concept of the student body, but conversing with her ready to make friends on your first day isn't the best first step you can take in this school. But judging from their faces, they remain oblivious of the sudden extracting of the cheer that once occupied this room. They even inquired if they could be seated in the seats surrounding my seat in the corner of the room, which were the most unwanted seats in the whole classroom as students try to avoid me at all costs.

They soon left their question unanswered since class started and I was unable to let words roll off my mouth. Sensei quieted the class who started a round of extensive whispering about the current events. The twins, who were apparently called Miku and Mikuo, just sat down beside me, Miku on my side and Mikuo in front of me, both offering me reassuring smiles without any words. The whole thing was just unbelievable to me. One day you are being tortured by the people you know, the next you two get strangers wanting to be your friend. As class dragged on, I thought of how I would approach this situation, but came about empty-handed as the whole situation, the whole predicament, was just so unfamiliar to me, so alien and uncharted, making me feel even more lost than ever.

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><p>As soon as I escaped the accusing glares of my classmates, all I saw was a flash of teal before I was bombarded by two very excited teenagers with the names of Mikuo and Miku Hatsune.<p>

"My God Rin, class took forever, we can finally talk and dramatically reconcile now!" Miku actively declared.

"Yeah! We have years of catching up!" Her twin, Mikuo announced to the whole school, receiving questioning glances targeted our way. Looks of pure confusion crossed all the students who stood in our path. I mean, I wouldn't blame them. There was such an odd sight in front of them. You don't usually see Rin Kagamine acquainted with two total strangers everyday in the hallway. At least with their shocked faces and expressions, and well the two gorgeous teens doting on me practically putting up a protective and unrelenting barrier around me, I won't have to face my daily punishment in the humiliating hallways for every one in the whole school to enjoy.

Finally, after what seemed like forever, I found my voice. "I'm sorry, but I think you found the wrong person. I don't recognize you at all..." I stated out meekly. I couldn't have possibly known these two before. Let alone forget them. The two looked like the type of individuals who would have a lasting effect in your mind, cling onto and override your memories. So if I met them before, I concluded, I couldn't have forgotten.

Mikuo flashed a smile of understanding. "We really didn't expect you to remember us either, so don't beat yourself up," He said reassuringly, as if he could sense the turmoil surging in my veins. "But you are most certainly our Rinny. You haven't changed a bit." He said fondly, yet I could hear a bit of disappointment in his voice.

"But nonetheless, we're here now, and whether you remember us or not doesn't matter. All _you_ need to know, Rinny my darling, is that it is mine and Mikuo's mission is to be your bestest friends for life!" Miku chanted dreamily. Her words, spoken in her delicate voice instantly warms me, caresses me, as the aspect of friendship caresses me as well, as that feeling seems so unfamiliar to me now. I have been longing, miserable, and lonely and even the potential of friends seems like an oasis of the purest water when I am stuck in a desert of solitude.

But looking up, I see the glares certain individuals targeting me. And that is enough to snap me back to reality, to remind me of my eternal punishment I can never escape. All the warmth briefly in me drains me as I suddenly feel foolish in believing for a moment I can have friends. I start to see the glares starting to be aimed like rusted arrows to the two twins beside me, undeserving as they are guilty of nothing besides trying to converse with me. As much as it pains me, drains me further of the life I have left, I have to inform them myself of the unmentioned rules that keeps everyone away for me, teach them myself to hate me, so they could be spared of the torture I face in a daily basis, torture that would most definitely spread to them if they continue to latch on to me, with no intention of letting go.

"Listen... Miku, Mikuo" I start. Two pairs of shining green eyes, the color of turquoise, meet me encouraging me to continue. I find it hard to continue staring into their eyes baring my weakened soul but I must. If I want to prevent anyone from experiencing the hell I face especially kind and pure people like the two of them, I need to keep them away. "I don't know if you already noticed, but people hate me here. Don't you see them glaring at us right now?" I point to a random group of freshman girls who are no doubt giving me looks of disdain.

The Hatsune twins take a look, shock now etched on _their_ faces as if truly noticing what has been happening throughout their short time here. Mikuo bothers to ask, "Why would anyone hate you Rinny? You're so cute!" He gives me a charming smile while Miku seems annoyed by his comment.

I find myself surprised to turning a little pink but push that aside as the longer they are with me, the more horrible their time in Kaizo will be. But smiling to myself, as if persuading even myself that this is the right thing to do, I continue my explanation. "They have reasons to hate me. Good reasons, too. Because while the rumors they spread about me are most likely not true, I still cause people misfortune, misery. To them, I'm just a burden, and as long as I'm a burden, I deserve to be hated."

The two seem completely taken aback by my words. Mikuo again tries to pipe up, trying to comfort me by saying, "You shouldn't think that, Rinny. No one deserves to be hated."

I look straight into his eyes and whisper painfully, tears starting to stream my eyes, my voice sounding strained and hoarse, "But I do. I'm horrible, weak, and deserved to be hated for it. And as long as I live, there will always be misfortune in this school. And if you stick around me, you'll end up hated, too. I'll end up ruining your lives... just like I ruined theirs."

As if on cue, a stocky jock, towering above me in terms of physical prowess and the in social pyramid, crashes into me roughly, forcing me to recoil to the floor and drop the books I was carrying for the next class thus disturbing my little monologue. Laughs echoed around the hallway as people once again get quite a show in seeing me in pain. Who I see as a ruthless monster is a brave hero to them, ready to strike at the cause of misery, me.

Even though I don't need to as I'm sure that little display of hostility was enough proof of the hate the school has of me, I look up at Miku and Mikuo, I guess to check their well being, but end up surprised at what I see. Mikuo is towering above me in a protective stance, his fury evident by his flaring nostrils, clenched fists, and his eyes swirling with rage. Just as it looks like he is about to strike at my tormentor, Miku who is also clearly very mad and insulted, yet radiating off a more tranquil fury, drapes her arm around her brother signifying him to stop. She whispers calm and collectedly toward her twin, "We'll get him later," before flashing a diabolical smirk, one of destruction.

Miku then turns to me and crouches down to my level. My eyes, yet again, meets hers and she reassures firmly with a careful smile, "It doesn't matter what other people think of you, because they don't matter. It doesn't matter what people do to us, because we don't care. And it doesn't matter if you let us stay or not, because we _are_ staying. But what does matter, Rinny darling, is how you treat yourself, because you are amazing. And Mikuo is a sappy idiot saying no one deserves to be hated, because that douche definitely deserves what's gonna come to him. But you, Rinny, you're the one who doesn't deserve to be hated. And it doesn't matter what you did, me and Mikuo won't leave you, because We. Don't. Care. And you might not believe this now, because to you we're just weird strangers, but we care for you. We really do." And with that, she looped her arms around me, hugging me, my first hug in ages, giving me a feeling, a warmth, that is no longer unfamiliar and alien. The feeling is warm, welcome, and most of all _familiar._

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><p><strong>AN: **MIKUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! Finally, she's here! And Mikuo too! The two of them are my favorite out of my whole cast of characters for who knows what reason. And aren't you glad Rin has friends now? I know you aren't glad Dancer028, cuz you want to hit Rin, don't you? I mean who doesn't at one point or another? Lol! (inside joke...you wouldn't get it) Well, tomorrow is Saturday so I might get an update either by then or Sunday, but only if I'm motivated. And what motivates me? Reviews! And tell me if you notice a theme or one of my very vague hints that I spread all over the story. I'll finalize if you correctly found one. Please, tell me anything I can do to inprove and I want to thank all of my faithful reviewers! R&R!

Tooooooooooooootles~!


	5. Acceptance

**A/N: **Here's my next chappie! I was kinda stuck on this one but I wanted to update ASAP! But this chapter is really significant cuz other characters finally SPEAK! AND Len (and the rest of them) actually do something! I know, you're all shocked! I sure was! And I guess it'll be happier with the Hatsunes here! And by the way, I cured my very annoying writer's block and planned out the next **10** chapters! Aren't you so proud of me? Well, updates will be even faster after this point! Enjoy!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Vocaloid! I feel sad now...

Thank you to **_Tragic Universe, Campanella, MaxJacksonCullengirl, MusicGamer, The Decareo Sisters, and ReturnoftheWings, _**for reviewing! Also, thank you to **_JayJay223, Pomegranata, ReturnoftheWings, silverfan3, The Decareo Sisters, and Tragic Universe _**for putting _Link _in their favorites! And finally, thank you to the following who put my story in their story/author alerts: **_angel1210005, Campanella, MaxJacksonCullengirl, MusicGamer, Pomegranata, ReturnoftheWings, The Decareo Sisters, and Tragic Universe. _**You guys are too kind and deserve a thousand virtual hugs!

**Summary: **Memories: They hold the very things we love and the very things we despise. Well, for this girl, Rin Kagamine, her memories are the link, the link that ties everyone and everything, including this story together. First part of the Memories Series! RinxLen

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><p><strong>Chapter 4: Acceptance<strong>

**(Rin's POV)**

As soon as the surge of warmth left my body as Miku ceased hugging me, she gracefully stood up and reached her arm toward me, urging me to get up, with a considerate smile on her face. I stare at her elongated arm meaningfully, perceiving it as more than a simple gesture of kindness, seeing it instead as a symbol of an unspoken oath being sworn by her, an oath that guarantees that she will always be at my side to pick me up when I am down, just like she is doing now. Right in front of me at this moment, Miku is offering me the companionship and acceptance I have been longing for years.

And against my better judgement, I start to reach out for her hand, ready to accept her promise. Selfishness overcomes me and as much as my conscience is against it, against dragging two innocent individuals into the hell I've been living, the swelling of my heart overpowers it, with my heart wanting nothing but to indulge in the woes of friendship. The thoughts of the torture the twins would face, the glares they would receive by onlooking students, the looks of pity teachers would give them, the feelings of betrayal that would linger in their once pure hearts, does cross my mind, but I push it away in favor of the cure of my own isolation, my loneliness.

On a whim, I take her hand and let her help me up, silently apologizing for my greedy sins and at the same time, welcoming them to my barren hellhole.

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><p>As soon as Miku and I get back on out feet, Mikuo joins us, taking the liberty to pick up my fallen belongings.<p>

I whisper him words of gratitude in response and in return, he gives me a mischievous smile, exposing the gleaming pearls called his teeth. He stealthily brushes up my ear and seductively purrs, "Anything for my gorgeous princess."

I turn a brilliant shade of scarlet and immediately stop walking, completely taken aback by Mikuo's comment. Miku on the other hand, appearing to overhear her brother's comment, also turns red yet for a different reason, rage. Steam puffs out of her inflamed nostrils as the sweet, calm and collected girl disappears turning into a raging beast, with the eyes ready to kill.

In a shrill voice, contrasting greatly from her previous sing-song voice, she scolds, "MIKUO! YOU ARE SUCH A PERVERT! How dare you try to taint someone as pure as MY Rinny~kins?"

Mikuo, not at all perplexed by his sister's sudden transition, spits out, "I'm not trying to 'taint' Rinny, whatever that means, sis! I'm just trying to confess my undying love to her! And who says Rin is yours, anyway?"

"I say she's mine!" Miku growls ferociously.

Completely lost and take aback, I stammer, "W-wait, y-y-you love me?" The two tealettes turn my way, their gazes turning miraculously softer.

"Don't believe him Rinny," Miku starts facing me, "Mikuo's just an idiot."

"Don't listen to _her_ Rinny," Mikuo also replies starting to turn his gaze to his sister. "Miku's just a bitch."

As the brother-sister pair continue fighting, getting the attention of various confused students, I can't help but feel truly content of my current situation, not willing to think of the foggy future. And surprising even myself, I let out my first true giggle, the sound so childlike and carefree, that it sounds so foreign and incapable to come out of my lips.

And after hearing my delighted giggles, the two bickering twins ceased their fighting, stating at me with confused faces before sharing a content smile with each other and join in with my laughter. And for the first time in years, I ponder merrily on the fact that for once in my life after losing my everything, I am finally accepted.

And with the newfound feelings of care and friendship in the form of companionship, the whole day goes by in a blur, and again for the first time in a while, I find time ticking away too fast rather than the usual feeling of restlessness I usually feel, as if the sands in the hourglass refuses to fall. We spend lunch together in a secluded area in the snow outside, away from all the abuse the student body would unleash on us .The three of us talk about nothing in particular the whole time, though nonetheless we bond over simple conversations. And through these conversations, I learn a little more about the Hatsunes. I learn of the two's undying passion of leeks. I learn of Miku's hair trigger temper, where she becomes a whole different person when provoked, usually by her brother. I learn of Mikuo's habit of picking up girls, though he swears that he would never do such a thing, especially to me, their "darling Rinny". And I find myself laughing, enjoying myself the whole time.

I occasionally join in the conversations, but would rather just sit back and watch the twins continue to rant, just enjoying the warmth inside me when they are present. I don't know whether it was desperation after the alienation, or the two's natural charisma, but for some reason, in the short time we spent together, I have grown very attached to the two, though a little more attached than I would please. I still don't want anyone going too far, though as of now, I'm helpless in doing anything to stop them from getting any closer, from getting pulled into the vortex that would forever trap them called my life. But I can't help myself from not caring, and would rather selfishly live in the moment instead of facing the darkening future.

We continually share things about ourselves, our interests, our passions, though I'm careful not to delve into the past. Even though Miku says they can accept anything, I still doubt her words knowing that if she learns the truth, they would undoubtedly leave me. So now all I can do is to keep the truth from crossing into their ears. And surprisingly, the two exuberant twins also stray off about their past also, especially on how I was involved in their past. Maybe they could be hiding a secret, but I could care less as I am too. Right now, all I do is thank the lord for not making the two snoop, for keeping them with me a little longer.

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><p>Time really did fly and we soon found ourselves hurrying out of class, ready to depart from school.<p>

"Hey Rinny," Miku starts, ecstasy still echoing in her voice, "let Mikuo and me walk you home! That way we know where you live so we can stalk... I mean visit you!"

"Okay!" I reply a little too quickly. In all honesty, I just don't want to be left alone again. I want to savor all the time I have with companions. So as we stroll home, I don't even think of what would come once we get there.

As soon as I see the distance of the small yet cozy building ahead of me, only then do I worry of how personal my relationship has gotten with the twins. I've only met them today, yet I cling onto them like I knew them my entire life. Inviting them into my home is like accepting the fact that they are and will forever part of me. And here I know, it's too late to leave them now without further pain, as I am in too deep. And yet, I'm not ready to give myself to them fully, not fully trusting them of never leaving me. Because I know if I do give everything I have to them, they could still inevitably leave, and if they do, I would be left with nothing just like before. So as we approach the building, I get ready to make a swift farewell before rushing inside.

Soon I learn though, that my attempts would be in vain as the moment I start to give my good-byes, Teto just conveniently strolls outside with the stray cat in her hands. She proclaims, completely oblivious of the presence of the twins, "Rinners! Mr. Kitty was at it again! It just broke another one of my vases! If it wasn't so cute, I would have asked him to leave by now! And you know..." Teto just continues to babble on, mostly nonsense, as I forget about my job to send the twins away. I flush with embarrassment at Teto's ramblings, who is like a mother to me, and change my objective: to shut up Teto.

I hurriedly ran up to Teto, pulling her close to me and whispered harshly, "Not now, Teto! We have people watching!"

This gets her attention and for the first time, she notices the two teal haired twins in front of us. I nervously take a peek at them, scared at how they reacted to my loony landlord. To my confusion, the two seem to be completely amused at her antics. I take a relieved sigh before refacing Teto.

She looks at me before addressing the twins with a welcoming smile. "My~" she breathes out soothingly, "Rinners never brought home friends before. Why don't you come in. I have cookies I'm willing to share! I'm Teto by the way!" Suddenly, I felt very conscious of the twins seeing my impersonal, shabby apartment, with barely any signs of anyone living there except for a few loose photographs on the wall.

Just as I was about to answer with a flat no, Mikuo spoke up happily, "Sure! I'm starving!" He patted his stomach as if he was giving proof.

Miku let out a giggle before responding, "Thank you so much Teto! That way, we get to see where Rinny lives! Yay! Maybe I can steal some cute baby pictures, too!"

Before I can let out a single word of protest, Teto is already escorting the two in. have no choice but to catch up.

As we are walking to my apartment door, Teto, continuing her idle chitchat, faces Mikuo and asks, "So, Mikuo-kun, are you my little Rinner's boyfriend?"

Miku and I gawk at her smiling face with shocked faces, while Mikuo just smiles carelessly answering with a enthused , "Yup!"

Miku's surprised face turns into a scowl as my own face flushes while I try to stammer, "N-no he's not."

Teto eyes us knowingly before sighing dreamily, "Ah~ Young Love..."

When we arrive to my apartment, Teto says, "Take good care of her Mikuo-kun! It was a pleasure to meet you, the both of you!" And with that, Teto dances off, giving Mikuo and I suggestive winks.

When we get into my apartment, I take close watch at the Hatsune twins, expecting them to show disgust at my pathetic apartment. But once again surprising me, the two look like they're in wonderland, immediately rushing to examine the photos of me younger. "This is great," Mikuo comments.

"I'm glad you like it..." I respond, not sure what to say next. And thank God I didn't have to say anything as Teto was already calling me down to pick up the cookies she promised. I leave the twins, too busy to keep their eyes away from the pictures as I go down.

Once the warm batch of cookies are in my hands, I stroll back, only to be surprised by the silence. I walk into my room and see the Hatsune twins huddled over my desk. They are staring at something on the smooth surface of the table. As I edge on closer to see what has rendered the chatty twins speechless, I see the object they are staring at: the broken picture frame with the pictures of the 6 children on it.

Fear crosses my brain. _The two couldn't have known the significance of this picture, could they? Of course not! I only met them today! But why are staring so meaningfully at it?_ I push the questions out of my mind as I clear my throat to get their attention. I want to keep the past or any traces of the past out of my time with Miku and Mikuo, in fear they might truly realize the true darkness that lies in it. I successfully get their attention, making them lose the clouded look in their eyes as they turn back to me.

"Oh, hey Rin," Miku whispers, "We were just looking at how cute you were as a kid."

I ignore their suspicious behavior as I offer them the cookies, in need of a change of subject. Thankfully, Mikuo wasn't lying when he said he was hungry as he scarfed down the cookies once his eyes caught sight of it. Miku looked at him, once again disgusted by her brother. I'm thankful things are normal once again, but I can't help but wonder what they saw in the picture. _Whatever they saw, it couldn't have been about what happened on that day, _I concluded.

Once again, the afternoon passed by without further incident, and soon the dark of the night signaled it was time for the two tealettes to leave. After saying their goodbyes and promising to pick me up tomorrow, the two turned around heading for home. As I watch their retreating forms, I feel my heart ache noticing I am alone once again. With them gone, I am again that weak, depressed girl that is just a burden. And this is the moment that I accept that I desperately need Miku and Mikuo in my life, caring for them like family, and would do anything to keep them from finding the truth.

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><p>The next day came bright and early, and when I get down, I am greeted by the happy faces of the Hatsune twins, just as they promised. As we got to school, instead of being greeted by the glares of the student body, we were instead bombarded by a flustered teacher, ushering us to the assembly hall. There, all the students are gathered cheerfully, too busy and carried away by the festivities to acknowledge us. At least it's better than the torture I would come to face.<p>

I know what the assembly is for, everybody in the school does, except for the new twins next to me. It's to get volunteers to start working on the Hanabi Festival this September. The school usually starts recruiting just before the second trimester is over and right before Christmas break, so the students participating will have two whole trimesters to prepare. This just shows how important the festival is to the school. I look over to the confused faces of the Hatsune twins and whisper, "The Hanabi Festival" to them as that one word should be enough to explain the situation.

But instead of getting looks of understanding in return, I see the blank looks on the twins eyes that was there yesterday. Somehow, the mentioning of the Hanabi Festival triggered somrthing within them. But before I can inquire further, Kiyoteru-sensei silences us all, ready to start the program.

"Ladies and Gentlemen," he announces to the crowd, "We are here to start the planning for the annual Hanabi Festival!"Cheers were heard throughout the auditorium, signaling the joy the Hanabi Festival usually brings. Sensei continues, "And to start we will choose our ten participants who will lead the festival! Any volunteers?"

The cheers continued, cheering for the ones who will eventually volunteer, the ones who will be counted on to make the festival a success. No one ever volunteers for this on a whim as it takes lots of money, time, resources, and most of all fame, to run the festival. So usually, the ones at the top of our social pyramid are the ones who run the festival with their money from their influential parents and their blaring popularity. Volunteering without knowing your place is an insult, a major act of arrogance and stupidity, and if the festival falters at all, you would be blame for the failure of the festival. So now we are awaiting the current rulers of the school to stand up and participate. And the current of the school this year, is _them._

The group of six stand up proudly and receive an uproar of cheers in response. _Him_ with his untidy blond hair. _Her_ with her golden single pigtail. _Him_ with his eyes the color of sapphire. _Her_ with her chocolate eyes blazing. _Him_ with his carefree smirk. And _her_ with her poised smile. _They_ are the school's rulers. _They_ are also why I am hated, because whatever the rulers command, the whole school, being their servants, obediently follow. And this time, they have commanded for all hell to break loose upon me.

I let out a smile despite the unnecessary flashbacks that pound into my head. The smile is because once again, they prove that my memories of the Hanabi Festival will forever be linked with them, forever reminding me of the friends I lost years ago.

Sensei continues, "We now have six participants, will there be any more volunteers?" This is usually when the random lottery starts, to choose the remaining participants. These participants, however, would just most likely linger in the background and allow the rulers to work everything out to avoid the risk of failure. But what happened next came to a shock to all of us.

All of a sudden, just as Kiyoteru-sensei started eying the ballots, two figures shot up, actively dragging another figure with them. The two that rose willingly, Mikuo Hatsune and Miku Hatsune, announced a statement with determination flaring in their eyes that shocked the third individual, named Rin Kagamine, along with the rest of the student body: "The three of us will volunteer!"

And it was at that moment that the Hatsune twins accepted an offer that would further complicate my already complicated life.

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><p><strong>AN:** Sorry that this update is late! I had to do volunteer work so I couldn't upload in the morning! But this is the point when the story's gonna really pick up! And since I have the next **10** chapters pretty much ready, you don't need to wait for that long for the story to pick up. Next chapter, we finally get to hear Len talk to our darling Rinny! I know! It's so exciting! So please, review and tell me what you think! R&R!


	6. Encounter

**A/N: **You know that cliffhanger last chapter? and the cliffie in chapter 2? Well, get used to them. The next few chapters will have them. Lickily, I hate leaving on a cliffhanger just as much as you guys hate waiting for them so I'll update ASAP! And finally, Len TALKS! And we get introduced to my OC! Just to warn you in advance, the next two chapter, they'll probably my shortest works. But it's for the suspense, trust me! And as always, review cuz while my writer's block is gone, I still need inspiration to type! And I'm running out of coffee!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Vocaloid! It doesn't stop me from wishing...

Thank you to **_MaxJacksonCullengirl, MusicGamer, The Decareo Sisters, ReturnoftheWings, Aiko Namine, Campanella, Tragic Universe, Pomegranata, akichanz, and CluelessLeaf _**for reviewing! You guys seriously work fast!

**Summary: **Memories: They hold the very things we love and the very things we despise. Well, for this girl, Rin Kagamine, her memories are the link, the link that ties everyone and everything, including this story together. First part of the Memories Series! RinxLen

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><p><strong>Chapter 4: Encounter<strong>

**(Rin's POV)**

A single encounter. That's all it takes to forever change the course of your like. I should know this personally, as because of certain encounters, the course of my cozy life made me wander into the hell I live in now. So knowing this, what do I think when I am forcefully volunteered by the two twins beside me into a position crucial to the school along with my former friends who now hate every part of my being? _This is going to get complicated._

Stares are at first the only thing that we get as responses. Soon, the stares turn into glares accompanied by deceitful whispers. Soon the whispers transition into loud booing, and after that, objects are being thrown relentlessly, from crumpled paper to unsightly sneakers, with the three of us as targets, in an effort to punish us for ruining the festival as they see it. I mean, who would want the most hated girl in town manning the most important event in the year? Certainly not them.

While I flinch at every object that comes my way, Miku and Mikuo stay stationary, not willing to move. While they remain still as rocks, the burning sensation of determination lingers in their eyes for who knows what reason.

After regaining his senses, Kiyoteu-sensei calms down the chaos that started in the auditorium and ushers us to stand up on the stage along with them. He gives us a long look, meaning anything from a silent apology to advanced mournings for our upcoming deaths. Miku and Mikuo walk rigidly, while I am stuck following closely at their heels, keeping my head up, not daring to look up.

After gathering up my courage, I venture to look up, only to see the expected, hell in my future partners' eyes. Luka shakes her head disappointedly with a forlorn expression on her face as if already giving up on the festival. Kaito stands collectedly, though deep inside his eyes you could see pure turmoil as if warning me that I shouldn't be here. Meiko sends me looks of pure terror, anger being spelled out by her body, as her scowl deepens. Gakupo is still straining his smile for the audience, yet anyone at a close proximity can sense the discomfort of having me here. Len has a cold mask on, not willing to betray no other emotion but indifference, though he could be seen discreetly staring at me the whole time. And Neru is openly glaring at me, clearly displeased of the thought of spending any more time with me. She mouths, 'I'll kill you' before turning away and facing the crown annoyed. And as of now, with the course life is taking me, I might actually take up Neru's offer.

Soon enough though, the collected hate radiating from the six individuals in front of me proves too much and I cower behind Miku. Even though they are right next to me, I don't get the usual feeling of security I usually get when around the Hatsunes, thus making me feel even more vulnerable. Sensei, sensing the tension on the stage, nervously tries to continue on.

"W-well, we now have nine participants. And since I reckon no one else wants to volunteer, I will choose a ballot randomly." No matter who the student chosen will be, even if it is one of my tormentors, I can't help but feel for them as being chosen to be in the middle of this situation is like wandering in the middle of an enemy ambush, an extremely unlucky encounter.

"Keiichi Haruki" The name of the person chosen by Kiyoteru, the person with the worst luck in the school. As sighs of relief flooded through the auditorium, we search for the lad who has received a one way ticket to hell. As I see the individual stand up, ready to mark his burial ground, I notice something uncannily familiar. His neat chestnut hair. His cool jade eyes. His cold expression. That's when it hits me, he is the mysterious boy I was blessed an encounter with days ago. The one who re-sprouted the feelings on homeliness in me.

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><p>The assembly finished soon enough, and soon I found myself zipping through the crowd venting their expected hostility dragging the dazed Hatsune twins out of the chaos. Looking back behind me, I see Neru and the others, still lingering in the auditorium, gathered in a huddle, most likely to discuss the dislike they share of the situation. Keiichi is no where to be seen, most likely making the wise decision to leave earlier. But unfortunately, with myself dragging the unresponsive twins behind me, I couldn't make the desired quick escape, forcing me to experience the hostility of the students I would rather ignore. So now here I find myself trying to once again, zigzag my way out of another unfortunate encounter.<p>

As soon as we escape the line of fire, I stop my movements and turn around, facing the two that got me into this situation.

"What were you guys thinking?" I interrogated inquisitively. The two just stared on, not fully back to their senses.

After a while of waiting for a response, Mikuo finally gained his consciousness, and answered unconvincingly, "I don't know... the whole thing seemed like fun," He then turned to me and after just realizing the wariness and hear in my eyes, continued, "But maybe we shouldn't have dragged you in with us."

After looking at them confused once again, I then decide to drop the subject, all of a sudden to tired to prod. And for some reason, I just can't stay cross at my two rising saviors after they saved me from my barren nightmare."It's okay I guess." I sigh tiredly. "There's no going back now.

Just as the subject was dropped and we started walking once more, waiting for lunch as the program took most of morning, I suddenly see him, wandering the hallways all alone. And for some reason, a moment later, I soon find myself rushing towards him away from the surprised Hatsunes, preparing for yet another encounter.

I discreetly creep my way behind him and gingerly tap his shoulder from the behind. He turns around slowly and as soon as my gaze meets his, confusion warms his cold face for just a second. He mumbles in a smooth, low voice, "You need anything?"

I respond meekly, "Keiichi-san, right?"

You looks at me for a while, examining me through the blue doorways called my eyes before responding. "Kei, just call me Kei-kun. We are in the same grade after all."

It takes me a while to respond, to recognize the familiarity in his voice, before I ask, "Have we met before?"

He looks at my eyes once again and I have no choice but to stare at his eyes, the color of jade. In a swift motion, he turns around and replies, "Not that you would remember." And with that vague comment, he was gone.

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><p>By then, the Hatsunes caught up with me with questioning glances. I dismissed the glances and trudged over to them, my turn to be in a gaze. Students started to line the hallways, so we kept a low profile, our only choice after the stunt we pulled. Soon enough, Kiyoteru-sensei located us, calling us over to remind us of the meeting we would hold at the end of the day to discuss the festival.<p>

How could I possibly forget about that? I've been dreading for them moment ever since i learned of it. The simultaneous glares from the six of them already wore out my confidence and even though I still have Miku and Mikuo, when it comes to this matter, the two seem unreliable, leaving me potentially with no protection.

And talking about the Hatsunes, the two of them have been dismissive of the festival the whole time. Whenever our conversations start to stray in that direction, the two drop the matter quickly, changing the subject skillfully. As much as I want to know what it's in their minds, I have no right to pry. So I would just leave the matter.

Soon, much faster than I would please, the day goes on by and the moment of dread was only a walkway away. But before we get through the auditorium doors, I see him, waiting patiently outside the door. Len.

Our gazes meet eachother, creating a clash between blue and blue so icy that it makes my stomach churn. He turns towards us and trudges over to me slowly making me gradually shrink to his presence. Mikuo and Miku, suspicious of his presence, stand protectively in front of me.

"What do you want?" Miku asks crossly.

He doesn't bother to meet their gaze, keeping his eyes squarely on me. "Rin," He speaks my name impersonally in a bored monotone. "I want to talk to her." He bothers to look at the two twins who are starting to boil with irritation of his impassive manner. "Privately," he adds.

Mikuo glares at him and growls at him especially fiercely, "And why would we do that?"

"Because I told you so." He answers obnoxiously. "And anyway, Rin knows to listen to me."

That comment has both Mikuo and Miku flaring, no longer able to keep their cool. Before any of them could do a thing, I respond quickly, addressing them, "Don't worry guys. I'll just hear out what he says."

They give Len one last look before shuffling inside, leaving me alone with the impassive former friend. Before I can even say a word, Len already warns "You shouldn't be here," swiftly getting to his point. "This'll only make your life a lot harder. If you do this, the whole school will get the chance to further humiliate you and us in the process. You should leave when you still have the chance."

His words sting as does his glare but I fully consider his words, finding some truth in them. I would almost definitely get humiliated and tortured. I know that. But for some reason, I am able to match his fierce gaze, and reply, "Thank you but you don't need to worry. I know what I'm getting myself into." And with that, I walk away from him pondering on what brought about such confidence. And in a moment, i have my answer: the two twins through that door. They, with their limitless courage, brought about that courage inside me. In the few short days we spent together, they have already inspired me.

But before I could so in to meet my sources of inspiration, Len warns with his blond bangs covering his face, "Don't say I didn't warn you. Because if the moment calls for it, I won't give any mercy either." And with that, he walks past me, leaving me frozen.

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><p>When I walk in, I see the unlikely group of familiar individuals in front of me. I see the welcoming faces of the Hatsune twins across the room. I see Kei's cold gaze surveying me. but most of all, I see the glares sent out by the group of six right in front of me. One of the glaring figures move, Neru, and in a moment, I am shoved to the ground.<p>

Neru whispers coldly, "You should have taken Len's warning and left when you had a chance." And with that, she ramms my face on the floor forcing tears to stream towards my face. She continuously ramms my face, snickering coldly the whole time. "Awww... why aren't your two idiotic friends helping you out?" directing the question to the two startled twins. "Is it because they see you for what you really are?" She smirks. "But maybe I should tell them just to make sure."

With this statement, the tears finally left my eyes. "Please...no..." I beg miserably. "Don't tell them!"

Neru smirks diabolically, fully enjoying my pain. "Don't tell them what? That you're a whore who goes after every guy in school. That you're a cheater who counts on tricks to stay in this school? That you're a backstabber with a long history of betraying her friends?"

I feel guilty for all of Neru;s accusations. While they are not true, only myths fueled by gossip, I still feel guilty for them as they, whether true ar false, still caused people involved pain. The boys I was rumored to get involved with faced major shunning. The teachers responsible for my tests suffered resenting from their students. And my former friends faced unnecessary bouts of pity.

Neru's smirk now disappears turning into a scowl of rage, ready to pull her trump card. "Or is it that you're afraid that I'll tell them about 3 years ago, when you tried to kill me."

The encounter that happened next went on so fast, I could hardly comprehend. In a flash, Neru was hoisted off me and shoved into a wall. Miku was standing right in front of her with a hand raised up into the air. In an instant, her hand descended down to Neru's cheek, impacting it with a single "_SLAP"_

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><p><strong>AN:** There it is y'all my cliffie! I'm gonna stop talkinig to let the moment sink in!


	7. Consequences

**A/N: **I'm really sorry y'all! Really REALLY sorry! For not updating as fast as I used to and leaving you in that cliffhanger! I'm really sorry but life and a series of unfortunate events happened... Well,I'm back, that's all you need to know! And actually, I want to address something right away. The most popular comments were either Miku's badass (I know), Len's an ass, or Neru's a bitch! Well, let me tell you Len and Neru'll get lots better so try to warm up to them. Please?

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Vocaloid! I'm sad again...

Thank you to **_MaxJacksonCullengirl, MusicGamer, Twingkly'Zaa-chan, The Conceited One, ReturnoftheWings, c0baltMiku-san, Campanella, Tragic Universe, Pomegranata, akichanz, and CluelessLeaf _**for reviewing! I thank y'all for your regular reviews!

**Summary: **Memories: They hold the very things we love and the very things we despise. Well, for this girl, Rin Kagamine, her memories are the link, the link that ties everyone and everything, including this story together. First part of the Memories Series! RinxLen

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><p><strong>Chapter 6: Consequences<strong>

**(Rin's POV)**

Consequences. That word is familiar to me and associates with me like the back of my hand. I know personally, everything in life has its consequence and now, after unwillingly facing all of them head on, I learned to examine the consequence of every situation in life to see the harm it could cause. So what was going to be Miku's consequence in slapping Neru? _Bad._ And what was her consequence of just storming away dragging the speechless Mikuo and me with her, actively skipping the meeting and leaving Neru shocked and humiliated? _Worse._

But I only come to this conclusion a long while later, in the comfort of my own bed, in my own room, in my own apartment. Not once did I consider the consequences of Miku's actions until now. It never crossed my mind during the situation itself. It never crossed my mind when being dragged out by the ferocious beast stomping before me who I consider my best friend. It never crossed my mind on our walk home, eerily silent, as no one uttered a word. It never crossed my mind when I stepped into my apartment after exchanging farewells with the Hatsunes. Only now, hours later, illuminated by the glowing moonlight as the stars trying to comfort me in my sleepless night, do I realize the full extent of what happened, the severity of her consequences.

But now that I come to this conclusion, I wonder why that in all this time, the thought didn't come to me earlier, why I didn't notice it sooner so I could take action. But as I look back into the depths of my memories, my only lifeline, I find that my picture of the whole encounter is heavily muddled, as if my mind was away at the moment, unwilling to take in the scene that occurred in front of me. I try to convince myself, maybe it was the rush of the moment, the shock of Neru, the queen bee, being defied. But a feeling inside me, a feeling I've been trying to suppress, a feeling of happiness, is trying to convince me otherwise. I can't help but think that maybe the thought never crossed my mind as for once, I've been trying to defy the consequences and indulge in the happiness I cant help but feel, happiness because of Miku, who was the first one to defend me after the incident 3 years ago. 3 years ago. When my life spiraled down to where it is now.

3 years ago, I was accused of trying to murder Neru. The whole incident was considered an accident though _I_ find myself guilty, guilty of all the hurt I caused Neru to face, and Neru sees me as guilty as well. That's why I devoted my life to punishment, punishment I deserved but did not get. And I didn't need self harm, I could count on Neru and the whole of the school to punish me. Because for all they know, and for all I care, I did try to end Neru's life. I am Neru's murderer.

3 years ago, the rumors of my unlawful deeds started to surface. Soon after the incident with Neru, more and more unfortunate rumours started to surface around me. Girls started blaming me for their break ups, effectively slapping me for ending their relationships with their boyfriends by turning them unfaithful through ways of seduction. This was untrue as no boy would be caught dead with me let alone love me and just used me as an outlet of breaking up with their tiring girlfriends. But I didn't tell their girlfriends. I didn't tell them because one: they would never believe me, their boys' whore, when I would try to explain to them, and two: I wouldn't want to hurt the girls. I didn't want the girl to blame themselves for their break ups or their boyfriends, no matter how low they are. I am pleased in being the blame, an outlet for the frustration. So soon, I was labeled the school whore. Next, my grades, which were a little above average, was believed to be gained through the use of cheating, just so I could stay in the school to cause more misfortune. That was evidently untrue as I used to continually study, aspiring to do my best, but people saw that it was all a facade in trying to manipulate my teachers. The situation reached a boiling point when teachers gathered me during a staff meeting to prove I didn't cheat. I showed up innocent, to the dismay of the students, so the students started to disrespect the teachers, thinking that they would be allowed to do anything. And seeing the turmoil in the teachers' faces compelled me to downgrade my scores, doing my best to just barely pass, so teachers can regain the respect of students. The teachers solemnly knew of the favor I secretly promised and are gracious of it, trying to show their thanks through sympathy, sympathy I see as dangerous to their authority, so sympathy I refuse. But still, after failing, I was still seen as a cheater. And again, the reputation I would get as a betrayer started as well. I was seen as someone who would befriend someone just so I could use them and soon abandon them when I was done. This again makes no sense as once again, no one would ever want to willingly stay by my side. But nonetheless, I was blamed for tears falling off my peers' eyes, for the slap marks on their faces, the bruises on their bodies, when in reality, it was most likely a spat between two others. And that's the story of how I became a backstabber.

3 years ago, Len, Luka, Meiko, Kaito, and Gakupo fell into the depths of the rumours and started to hate me as well, making me lose all I had left. At first, they doubted the rumors I didn't bother to clear up, retaining our childhood bonds. But soon, they started receiving penalty of sticking by me sich as shunning, insults, and beatings. And finally, they all decided they had enough of me, apparently seeing proof of my misdeeds and just left. Leaving me alone.

3 years ago, Neru relayed my attempted murder and the rumors about me to others, actively preventing me from gaining anything else. After coming her state of distress, Neru came back with a new objective: to ruin my life. And I wouldn't blame her. In her, in mine, and in everone's eyes, I did try to take her life. So in order to reach her goal, Neru went shamelessly told everyone of my murder attempt. This kept many away. And for those who couldn't believe that the baby-faced , blue-eyed, blonde girl was a killer, they were driven away by the rumors, or the known fact that you would be shunned if you are around me. And with that, Neru was successful in making my life a lonely hell as no one did bother to come to me again, to try to hear me out if I actually talked. Everyone until the Hatsune twins.

Thinking back to the scene, I wonder if Miku heard all of what Neru proclaimed or did my cries successfully drown out her words. I doubt that Miku heard a thing as who would want to befriend a murderer even after what she promised? Also, if she did hear it, wouldn't she at leat question me? But they didnt and while the walk home was in solitude, it was more likely out of shock of the slap than the shock of the revaltion. I sigh a breath of relied. _Of course they didn't hear._

But now, I cant help but wonder what drove Miku to slap Neru, what drove the twins to be my friend? They both expressed their care for me, but _why? _Why would they care about me of all people? Why would they risk the consequences of being my friend? I don't know the answer of these questions, but right now, I don't care as long as I still have the Hatsunes by my side.

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><p>Soon, I find myself waking up to my alarm clock, surprised to actually get some sleep after the train of thought coursing through my brain last night. Despite myself, despite the fear of the consequences I should be feeling, instead I feel excited, excited to see the Hatsunes, to make sure they are still part of my life.<p>

After rushing through my morning routine, I find myself scurrying down into the streets, ready to meet up with the two teal haired twins. And just as i dreamed, they are right outside, waiting patiently for me, yet bickering as usual. I smile and envy their ability to regain their happiness, how they can be so calm this moment. But still, nonetheless, I feel happy to regain the status quo and enjoy their company once again.

The walk to school was full of pep thanks to the Hatsune twins even though I barely uttered a word. I was a little too busy lost in my own thoughts. I was so out of it that I didn't notice the two tealettes behind me stop abruptly. I obliviously kept on walking, my head down, not knowing what was going on. That is until I collided facefirst right into a the person's chest, the cause of Miku and Mikuo's halt. I looked up to the unmoving person to see jade eyes swirling with hidden fondness. I stared right into them, loving the feeling of homeliness it gave me, like the feeling I get when I see the Hatsunes' infamous smile. After I see the slight blush coating the boy's face as I was practically hugging him, I back away quickly, somewhat embarrasses of our close proximity. I look into his eyes again. "Rin-san" he utters. Kei-kun.

I try to regain my mind as I try to reply, "Y-yes?" He looks behind me at the two figures I momentarily forgot. As he does, I peek at Miku, who has a mischievous smile on her face, and Mikuo, who is wearing a threatened scowl. And looking at their confused faces, I forgot that Kei was a total stranger to them. I hastily turn to them, introducing Kei. "Miku, Mikuo, this is Kei-kun. He'll be working with us for the festival."

The two bow with respect and say their names. As I look back at Kei, his familiarness is gone, all of a sudden turning serious. He looks over the three of us before saying in a forlorn voice, "You guys better be careful. The folks yesterday weren't happy about your stunt." He said the last part directly to Miku.

Surprisingly, Miku just smiles at him, replying "No worries, Kei-kun. What _I'm_ worrying about is your relationship with my little Rinny. Cuz she's off limits."

Kei just glares at Miku, a slight blush on his face, before mumbling, "Whatever," and trudging away.

Miku just giggles happily at our encounter and once again I am awestruck at how they can be so happy during this crisis. Miku and Mikuo continue walking and I try to follow their heels.

And in a flash, we are at school. As soon the gates open, we are met by a site all too familiar to me. The whole of the student body, led by Neru and my former childhood friends, is gathered by the gates with snowballs in their hands. I laugh humorlessly. Looks like, after distracted by Miku and Mikuo, the student body is ready to restart their punishment.

But as I brace myself for the upcoming pelting of the snowballs, I sense something amiss. And here I notice that the glares masterfully adorned on every students' face is not directed at me but on the Hatsune twins right next to me. And all the twins offer in response is a feeble smile.

And as the snowballs come their way, I uselessly try to block the line of fire so the snowballs would hit me, the one truly guilty, instead of the two twins whose only crime is choosing to be seen with me. But I inevitably fail as I am shoved towards the ground stopping my tries, able to do nothing but watch as the Hatsunes get mistreated for no reason but defending me.

As the snowballs keep on coming, Neru casually walks up to Miku, dodging the snowballs, and grabs her mystifying teal hair, whispering into her ear, "Are you still gonna choose to stick by that murderer? Even knowing you'll face this everyday."

Miku's eyes remain dark before a smile reaches her face. She then giggles before proclaiming determinedly, for everyone to hear, "I'm never gonna leave my Rinny!"

And with this comment, Miku is shoved to the floor by Neru, as the snowballs render Mikuo useless from fighting back. More students come, most likely to join in on the torturing and soon Mikuo is kicked to the ground as well. But before I see what comes next, I notice the scene in front of me is fading away, getting further and further. Before I see what comes next, I run away. Run away from witnessing the punishment Miku and Mikuo are forced to face. Running away from the fears that they would leave me, clearing up the suspicion that yes, they did hear Neru's words before. But most of all, I am running away from the consequences, the consequence I would face for foolishly letting people into my life. And as I hear my name being called by the two distressed twins behind me, I ignore them, and all I do is run away.

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><p><strong>AN:** There it is y'all. It didn't turn out as good as I wanted it to but my original copy was lost so I was forced to type this ASAP, causing the delay. Yeah, sorry about that, and sorry to come back only to give another cliffie. Yeah... but still, tell me what you think! R&R!


	8. Abandonment

**A/N: **I'm sorry about the irregular updates and the recent delay but I was in an art craze and really had no motivation to type. Maybe I should schedule weekly updates...? But that seems too long of a wait! Tell me what you guys think cuz apparently I can't do daily updates in your reviews! And OMG! I reached 50 reviews guys Thankies so much!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Vocaloid! I just marvel at all its glory.

Thank you to **_MaxJacksonCullengirl, MusicGamer, SweetLolita, Silver Rowdyruff Girl, ReturnoftheWings, Campanella, Tragic Universe, Pomegranata, akichanz, and CluelessLeaf _**for reviewing! I reached 50 just because of you guys! Hurray!

**Summary: **Memories: They hold the very things we love and the very things we despise. Well, for this girl, Rin Kagamine, her memories are the link, the link that ties everyone and everything, including this story together. First part of the Memories Series! RinxLen

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><p><strong>Chapter 7: Abandonment<strong>

**(Rin's POV)**

I run. All I do is run as far as my legs could take me, away from the hateful scene behind me. I refuse to look back, in fear I might see the beatings of the Hatsune's I have been trying to block out of my mind. In reality, my whole mind is blurred, not taking in the surroundings around me but rather fixed to seeing the sight of Miku and Mikuo being brutally pushed down and hearing the desperate calls coming out of the two's bruised lips. I try to run faster in order to keep my mind away from thinking of them, the only beings I considered friends, the friends I am about to lose, but ultimately, I fail as my mind continues to wander.

What do they think of me right now? They probably resent me, resent me for just leaving them in the dust in a moment of pure crisis. I guess Miku's promise will forever remain unfulfilled as in the end, she will most likely leave me, abandon me. I think of myself as a fool for momentarily believing in her promise. I mean who would swear to stick by me, such an unworthy being, for eternity?

They probably think of me as a coward for not standing up for them after they repeatedly stood up for me. I was unable to do a thing but watch them in pain, not because of fear but because of pure incompetence as I am useless in everything, even in keeping friends. Even then, I couldn't even watch their punishment as I could not stand to see the outcome, the consequence faced because of me.

They probably think of me as wasted time and effort, wasting their first days here, and spoiling their reputation in school. All the times I treasured so much with them would be all in vain because as of then, our friendship is most likely over, proving all of the times we had before as useless and irrelevant.

They probably think the hateful rumors of me are true as well, after I pretty much gave them proof, undeniable evidence, of them, showing me as unreliable. I just left them, without any explanation, just like I supposedly did in the rumors. And for all they know, I just used them, used them as a source to cure my solitude and boredom, like two beaten rag dolls.

And they probably hate me, hate my existence, because of all the pain I caused for them. But I would rather have them hate me, regret the times we shared, than having them beside me, being hated with me, because of me.

But the hate they may feel for me is nothing compared to the hate I feel for myself. I hate myself for being so useless, not being able to do a thing to help. I hate myself for being so spineless, to the point that if I could do anything, I wouldn't because of fear of what would come to me next. I hate myself for being so selfish, for only caring about my own well being instead of other's. I hate myself for being such a fool, a fool who was stupid enough to believe she could be loved after all the unforgivable crimes she committed and dragging two innocent individuals into her hell just for a cure of her boredom. I hate myself for all the pain the two are facing as of now, as that punishment is misdirected, as I am the one who truly deserves to be beaten. But most of all, I hate myself for letting go of things so easily, abandoning them without a fight, as if I don't give a damn about them, that I don't care for them. But I do care. And because I care, I hate myself for everything I let go.

Looking back at the sheer amount of the things I released, you would think I am used to it, abandoning things, moving on, and take it in stride. But I'm not used to it. Every time I let something go, a part of me is ripped out and never returned. I left so many things, my childhood, my innocence, my friends, my life, my future, and soon the Hatsunes. And every time I lost each and everyone of those things, a piece of my heart drops, getting shattered on the sheltered floor called reality, and torn apart like pale paper ghosts whose remains drift relentlessly in the moonlight. And for every aspect of myself I let go, I hate myself more and more.

So you could imagine my self hate when I start letting go of my consciousness, feeling exhausted from the physical and emotion strain I put myself in. It just proves how incompetent I truly am. But as i collapse on the ground, I see a vaguely familiar maple tree in front of me, the tree so symbolic to my childhood. I find it so ironic that the tree that signaled my beginning would also be the last sight I see before losing everything. It's as if I was fated to be forever in this spot. And the last thought that comes to me before everything goes black is that in this time and place, I wouldn't mind letting go of the last aspect I have left, my life. Right now, I wouldn't mind giving up everything I have left as it would benefit everyone affected by me. Yes, right now I would wish my life would be taken in right now just so I can finally abandon it all away.

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><p>Black. That's all I see in front of me. I don't know whether I'm drifting in my dreamworld, or whether my wish of dying was fulfilled but either way, I prefer it this way. I prefer to be in the dark, so empty and cold, just because this way, I have nothing. Nothing to lose and nothing to gain. And personally, having nothing is a gift to me as I can further avoid the pain of loss.<p>

But after moments of solitude in my world of darkness, I see a speck of light signaling my wish unfulfilled, signaling my unfortunate return to life. As I dread the moment when the blinding lights overcome me and swallow me, I yet again abandon the feeling of luxurious emptiness that I felt in that safe dark world.

As I spiral down into reality, the endless white slowly transitions into a swirl of other colors revealing the real world. I start to see the night sky, proof of the elapsed time that passed while I was in my unconscious state. Soon enough though, the color of jade takes dominance ans I find myself staring into the orbs of a jade eyed individual in front of me.

It takes a while to recognize him, to recognize the whole predicament actually but when I do, I gasp in shock.

"Kei-kun? I inquire in a hoarse voice recovering from sleep. I take a look at his profile leaning against the maple tree, the sight I collapsed in. His chestnut hair accents the bark soothingly and his jade eyes, trying to mask worry, match the few leaves still on the tree. His appearance is breathtaking and rekindles the feeling of familiarity I receive around him. I don't know the cause of this feeling but nonetheless, I find myself accepting it.

Suddenly, before I drown in his warmth, his gaze lying lazily on me, I catch myself and remember what I was doing before. I would have been foolish to do the same twice in a row. With his eyes still planted on me, I rush to stand, effectively getting a headrush, and try to flee, escape back to the feeling of solitude and emptiness I deserve. But before I am able to make a run for it, I find Kei's arm gripped tightly around my wrist, ceasing my tracks as well as nulling all my plans to drown myself in solitude.

"You're not going anywhere." He scolds, giving me a cold glance.

I muster up all my courage, very little at this moment as reply shakily, "And w-why not?"

He turns away and sighs tiredly. "Cuz I need to bring you back to them. They just won't shut up until you come back."

I look at him confused. "Them? Who?"

He stands up before replying, "Those two teal haired idiots. They threatened me to help look for you. Apperently their 'darling Rinny' is fragile." He smirks at this.

"Teal haired idiots? Miku and Mikuo?" I exclaim incredulously. They couldn't still be worried for me after what I did to them, could they?

Kei's face turns suddenly hardens, and I hear his voice say, "You're thinking of leaving them aren't you?"

I look at him shocked. It's only at this moment I realize how obvious I was. My emotions were displayed all over my face, opening me up to weakness. To try to recover, I respond as cool as I could, "What makes you say that?"

Kei frowns, "Because I know you feel guilty. I saw what they did to them. I saw you run away. I know you think it's your fault for hurting them." He says everything so accurately like my mind is communication to him to try to convince my outer exterior. His voice turns icy as he continues, "And it is your fault for hurting them! They can take a few punches. That doesn't matter. What they can't take is losing you."

I wince at the brutal truth of his words. Tears start to once again steam in my eyes. Looking down I ask, "So what am I supposed to do?"

Kei, to my shock, pulls up my chin and makes me stare into his princely figure. "Go back to them. Hear them out. Trust them. And besides, you can't shake 'em off. The two of them are really persistent, by the looks of it." And with that, he shines his first smile since our first meeting, a smile that makes me believe in every one of his words. "Come on," he urges, offering his hand. "Let's go back." And with that, I took his hand and let him escort me back to the now barren school gates, not trusting myself to confront this myself.

Two figures soon come into my line of sight. As soon as they see sight of me, they rush over like two kids in a candy store, pushing the very annoyed Kei away from me and my grasp. The two figures, Miku and Mikuo, both bombard me with hugs and words of gratitude. But before I lose myself once again, I back away slowly, shocking the two twins still doting on me.

"Why?" I start quietly, picking up pace as I go along. "Please answer me, why?"

Mikuo and Miku look at me shocked and confused of my outburst. Mikuo dares to ask, "I don't know what you're talking abou-"

Before he can finish I cut him off, desperately asking, "Why? Why would you worry for me after I just left you? Why would you stay by me after everything you heard I did? Why won't you just abandon me?" I'm crying at this point, not strong enough to hold back the tears.

Miku then takes me in her arms cradling me, wiping off my tears like the first day I met her. She gives the same reassuring smile before whispering, "Because when the time came, you didn't abandon us. So to make up the favor, we'll never abandon you."

And with that comment, I begin to sob into her, letting the loneliness and self hate I've been stockpiling for years out, releasing them from my system as finally, I have someone, someones, who will never leave me, never abandon me.

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><p><strong>AN:** Okay, I know that wasn't worth it after the long wait. I planned this chapter to be much better and less akward than the way it turned out. But I couldn't update because my parents just chose the most _convenient_ times to go out. Oh well, I hope you forgave Rin in this chapter y'all. i told ya it wouldn't last long. And as of next chapter, you'll notice Rin'll get a lot less angsty! But this story is far from over! But at least the cliffhangers are for the next few chapters. Well, I hope you guys keep on telling me my mistakes and what I can do to improve! And for those who are looking for hints, this chapter has about three vague ones! Please R&R!


	9. Reborn

**A/N: **Look you guys. I'm very sorry for the last chapter. It's definably my weakest and had way too much and unnecessary wangst. Rereading it, it didn't have much emotional value in it. And I'm extremely ashamed that I can't do anything to improve it because I need it to stay like that since the way it is will be a big part of the 4th story. Maybe then I can figure out how to improve it. The way I originally planned it was much more powerful but I changed it to match the plot better. But right now, I really determined to get this chapter in for its character development so all the angst will get away from my system. Looks like I'm facing the good parts of self-criticism, making me determined to fix myself rather than stop writing. And its all because of you guys. Thank you for the reviews and support.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Vocaloid.

Thank you to **_MaxJacksonCullengirl, MusicGamer, Silver Rowdyruff Girl, x-Rinny-Lenny, ReturnoftheWings, Campanella, Sweet Lollita, Bloody Black Rabbit, Pomegranata, akichanz, and CluelessLeaf _**for reviewing! Really, you guys are just way too nice.

**Summary: **Memories: They hold the very things we love and the very things we despise. Well, for this girl, Rin Kagamine, her memories are the link, the link that ties everyone and everything, including this story together. First part of the Memories Series! RinxLen

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><p><strong>Chapter 8: Reborn<strong>

**(Rin's POV)**

December 24th. That's the current date. A week has passed since the previous events. Ever since then, not much happened. I now spend all my days with the Hatsunes, feeling foolish for ever thinking of letting them go, letting go of all the joy they give me. I still think I don't deserve their unconditional love but as long as they are still offering it to me, I'd indulge in it easily. I felt so stupid trying to get rid of the only people that care for me, not having trust in them, when they game themselves fully into me. But now, I gave myself fully to them, exposing the real me, the me hidden away from everyone else as a resort of an emotional guard I wrapped around myself to prevent myself from getting hurt. But now that I released that guard, I feel better than ever, no longer feeling the need to run away, to deny the hate, to cover myself. Because I know the Hatsunes will be there. And I'll never let them go ever again.

Unexpectedly, I found someone else there in my life, Kei-kun. He, to my shock, Mikuo's annoyance, and Miku's creepy delight, frequently approaches us when we are together, either just dropping a careful hello, or actually stay with us to offer more company. In those visits, he barely utters a word, choosing just to irritatedly watch the twins' antics like I, but still, the company is enlightening and the feeling he gives me is very welcome, and I'm just glad he chose to stay with me after changing the course of life I was traveling on.

Mikuo, on the other hand, is very unwelcoming, often pouting when Kei joins our company. He openly insults Kei during our times and is very protective towards me for no reason I can see, a trait he shows whenever I am in the proximity of another male which leads to my confusion. Nonetheless, despite my protests and Miku's scolding, Mikuo continues his one sided bickering which Kei usually coolly ignores.

And Miku, well she's weirdly delighted whenever Kei arrives, unusually fixated on teasing him to which Kei retaliates to. Usually, the two get into... conversations just with eachother simply trading discreet insults and bouts of sarcasm with eerie smirks on their faces. You could call that outlandish but with Miku being Miku, the girl who could turn from a monster berating her brother to an angelic friend, that's somewhat in the norm.

And Kei, he usually remains just as cool as his exterior, though you can see annoyance in his jade eyes whenever either of the Hatsutes talk to him. I guess ever since their first meeting, the Hatsunes really left a mark on him, a bad one at that. And I guess that means Kei just visits for my sake, to check upon my condition.

Of course, the torture continued, if not intensified. But now, I don't face it alone. I have Miku, Mikuo, and Kei, much stronger than me, taking the punishment with me. Everytime each of us gets shunned, we have a backbone called our friends to support us through it, and because of that, let me tell you torture has never felt so good. I still feel guilty for all the looks they attract, the shoves they get, but I trust in them when they say they're alright, trust in them when they confirm that this is the path they chose, though I still try to provoke the torture towards myself, just so I can save them from some pain. Thankfully though, we avoided more torture and punishment when it came to ditching the planning session, as Kiyoteru-sensei decided to interview us individually on our thoughts after the first session ended in a failure, claiming he was trying to invoke more creative and unbiased thoughts using this process, though it is apparent to me that he was just trying to postpone another group meeting for my sake, so he can protect me and the Hatsunes, as internally, he pities us and wants to save us from more pain, and for that I am thankful.

So with that, winter break started signaling the end of the second trimester. As of now, I am staring outside my apartment window, awaiting the Hatsune twins so we can start in our holiday festivities. This is my first celebration in years so as expected, I am giddy as a six year old excited for the joys of the holidays. Teto, joyful of my sudden exuberance, as usually, I am gloomy in this time of year, decided to invite the Hatsunes to stay with us for the rest of winter break so my festivities can be lengthened. They gleefully accepted without a doubt, just as excited for the holidays as I. So now, I find myself waiting exuberantly for their arrival looking over the decor Teto and I decorated the apartment with and whiffing in the scent of newly baked gingerbread, feeling for the first time in years in this place, at home.

I let my mind ponder in boredom of the twins late arrival. I think of how easily they agreed in spending the rest of break, a good week or so, in my place. Won't their parents get worried? But as I recall back, neither Miku nor Mikuo ever mentioned their parents. Actually, they never talk about a bunch of things: where they live, how they can spend so much time with me, their lives at home, their reasons for moving. Despite the closeness we share, I still don't know so much about the Hatsune twins when it comes to their personal lives. And I don't pry because they don't pry when it comes to my own secrets. After hearing about my misdeeds, they never once asked me about it and I'm thankful because I'm not sure how I would respond. I'm still not fond of talking about my past. And I guess it could be the same with the Hatsunes.

Suddenly, I hear a doorbell ring and I rush downstairs, completely abandoning my train of thought. I jump down the stairs, taking two at a time out of pure excitement, and race with Teto, who has just been cooking casually, to open the door. I beat her and giggle at her questioning glance before opening the door. Instead of seeing just the two Hatsunes like I expected, another individual is joining them, with a readable scowl on his face. Kei is standing irritably with them, Miku, holding his tie like a leash, while the two twins just smile on.

"Ummm... hi!" I greet them with all the joy I could muster, feeling that this sort of thing would be in the norm for me ever since I met the Hatsune twins.

Miku smiles with great joy, looking like a princess, gives me a hug and cheers, "Rinny! Hope you like our Christmas present, it took a lot to drag it here!" She gives a sickeningly sweet look to Kei before continuing. "Right Kei-pon?"

Kei gives a irritated smile back and replies, "Uh-huh, Miku-chu." Oh, 'Kei-pon' and 'Miku-chu'. Names Kei and Miku call each other to further annoy the other.

Mikuo steps right next to me before sighing exasperatedly, "Just ignore them Rinny. It'll save your mental stability." I just giggle at the comment.

Miku turns right back to me and continues, "Just kidding! Of course I wouldn't give you _that_ as a present. I'm not a _complete_ bitch!"

Mikuo murmurs silently, but not enough to escape his sister's hearing, "At least not to Rin..."

Miku just giggles as if she didn't hear a thing, "I have something much better! But you won't get it till later, kay? Actually, I just brought him so Mikuo won't get lonely sleeping alone tonight! Just hope Teto doesn't mind!"

"Of course not deary. The more the merrier!" Teto cheers apparently hearing the whole conversation. "I'll get a whole room prepared just for them so they can enjoy some 'male bonding time'! Now why don't you come in so we can eat!"

"Great," both boys say unenthusiastically. And with that, we all stroll inside, enjoying the feeling of the holidays. Teto prepared a marvelous feast for us and before soon, we all find ourselves enjoying in idle chitchat.

"So, who is this looker?" Teto asks, obviously directing the question to Kei.

"Sorry for not indoducing myself sooner, ma'am. I'm Kei."

"Ooooh! You're quite the gentleman!" Teto eyes me mischievously. "Looks like Rinners here has a fine choice in young men!" I blush considerably, Kei chokes on his food in surprise, and Mikuo drops his silverware suddenly. "Now, now, Mikuo-kun. No need to be jealous. I'm sure Rinners won't forget about you! But, oh my, I'll be losing my Rinners so soon, eh?" Teto comments knowingly. If it is possible, my blush gets even deeper.

Miku eyes the three blushing faces before her before giggling. "You don't have to worry, Teto! I'll keep our Rinny pure from these two perverts!" Teto just chuckles in response.

After that, dinner ended and soon, we found our group seperated with Miku and I occupying a room and Mikuo and Kei occupying the other room next to us. As soon as we were tucked in, Miku immediately falls asleep, preparing to retire early so we can enjoy tomorrow's festivities. But I, before indulging in my dreamworld, take a look at the calendar plastered on my wall and whisper, "3 more days." And with that the day ended.

* * *

><p>December 25th. That is the current date. I woke up to Miku jumping excitedly on top of me repeatedly cheering, "Christmas! Christmas!" like a little girl. I join in her festivities before we scurry to the boys room to give them a similar treatment to wake them up. I tip-toe to Mikuo's bed with orders from Miku to wake him. I delicately poke his face, feeling his smooth perfect skin, repeatedly, feeling quite sad to disturb his peaceful slumber and his cute sleeping face. His stirs a little before his eyes slowly open, revealing his magnificent teal orbs. He looks at me for for a moment, confused, before smiling at me, greeting me sleepily, a Merry Christmas. On the other hand, Miku took the mission of waking Kei herself, used a less delicate approach of just pushing him off his bed, effectively waking him, and sitting on him to drown his oncoming complains. I laugh merrily at the site while Mikuo just looks on in annoyance at his sister.<p>

As soon as we calm another one of Miku's and Kei's arguments, we hurry downstairs, still in our pajamas, to be greeted by Teto and more importantly to Mikuo, breakfast. After a lofty breakfast of Christmas ham and eggs, the four of us head back upstairs to get ready for the Christmas festivities being held at the town plaza. Like the Hanabi Festival, the Christmas festivities is also very important to the town, though it is more of a community thing. I tried to get Teto to come along but she politely refused, giving the excuse that she was busy.

Remembering from my childhood, the stalls were set up to sell Christmas goods, and there was a small festival hosted by the adults. But the aspect that excited me the most was seeing the towering Christmas tree adorned with the most beautiful ornaments in the middle of the plaza, waiting to be lit when Christmas night came. So I rushed to get dressed, surprising Miku in my choice of dress and forcing her to dress me properly to my protests. Once I was ready, the two boys met us downstairs and soon enough, we were out and about, ready to go.

I marveled at all the gorgeous decorations of the city, the lights on trees, now fully bare; decorations adorned on windows, enlightening the town; and the joy glowing on people's faces. Even though I have been living here my entire life, this has been the first time I saw the city so happy and carefree in a while as usually, everyone surrounding me is disturbed by my presence and if they aren't I wouldn't be able to see since I always keep my head down, in fear of seeing the glares not there. But that is not the case now. Now, no one is glaring and no one in the town is unhappy. And soon, without my knowledge, I find myself twirling down the road, giggling the whole way, watching the decorations spin, as well as seeing the faces of the cheery onlookers, including Miku, Kei, and Mikuo, watching me with smiles on their faces for once. I guess this is what the holiday spirit really is about.

I dance my way all the way to the plaza, dragging my companions with me in a merry stroll, excited to see the tree. Before we get to the crowded plaze, Miku grabs my hand, requestiong my attention.

Miku smiles at me apologetically, and says, "Rinny, me and Kei-pon have to take care of something. As much as I don't want to leave you, with Mikuo nonetheless, and spend all my time with this grump, I have to."

I giggle as I reply, "No worries! I'll just go see the tree with Mikuo! Don't worry Miku, I'll be safe with him!" I wrap my arm around Mikuo's as if to give proof causing him to flinch for a reason I am not aware of. I turn to Kei and say teasingly, "Have fun with Miku-chu, Kei-pon!"

And I run away laughing taking Mikuo with me, our arms linked, towards the tree. I turn to look at him only to see him tomato red. I couldn't have ran _that_ fast, could I? Or maybe he's coming down with a fever? Maybe that explains why he hasn't given me a flirtatious comment yet. I stop in my tracks and ask, "Mikuo? Are you okay? You're red."

Mikuo jumps a little before turning back at me and smiling. "No need to worry Rinny! I'm fine! Now let's go to that tree!" He takes my hand and guides me through the crowd and to the tree. What I see is beyond my expectations.

I see a tree, so heavenly tall, green as the summer grass that withered long ago, decorated in the most beautiful ornaments. There are red ones, looking like jeweled apples hanging all over the tree are accented by little emerald balls. Lights resembling white stars are lined all over the tree, only to introduce the most beautiful sight of all, the star, reflecting the sun like the treasured jewel of our town. I take in a breath admiring the beauty. "It really is beautiful," I breathe out.

Mikuo turns to me, his face no longer red to my relief and whispers, "It really is..."

After spending a long while staring at the tree, Mikuo urges us to leave to a less crowded space before we get squished. I reluctantly let him escort me to the sidelines near the shopping district. As we come to a stop, Mikuo turns my way, a serious look on his face.

"Look, Rin, I need to tell you something."

"Yes, Mikuo?" I ask with a curious look on my face.

He takes a deep breath. He then begins to stutter through his sentence. "I r-really wanted to tell you that I-I really meant it w-when I said I l-lov-"

Before he got to finish his long sentence, a familiar yell was heard and I turn to see Miku and Kei, both walking towards us. "Hey guys!" She screams. I run to hug her, glad we are reunited. She takes a look at me before raising an eyebrow at Mikuo who is suspiciously pouting. "Did I disturb anything?" She questions her brother teasingly.

"Nothin'" her brother spits out grumpily. I give him a look he avoids. "Was just gonna tell Rin that I love cute blondes like her."

Miku tranquilly hands me off to Kei who is shaking his head in anticipation for Miku's upcoming outburst. Miku, as expected, fumes at her brother giving him no mercy. She traps him in a headlock before screaming in his ear "You are such a PERVERT! I told you to not corrupt MY innocent Rinny!" Before Miku can give her finishing blow, to hit Mikuo in her _favorite _spot that always gets Mikuo to bend down in pain, Kei to wince in sympathy, and Miku laughing sadistically, Mikuo gives his twin a look, an... apologetic, desperate, a... warning look. And once Miku sees her brother, she releases him, content on leaving him on the ground heaving. Miku shakes her head disapprovingly and says, "Really Mikuo, you gotta learn to keep your promises. We gotta _share_ Rinny, remember?"

I give a confused look, not knowing what they are talking about. Kei takes a look at me looking amused before announcing, "Let's go. The festival's about to start."

And with that we were once again off in enjoying the joys of Christmas, that mysterious event not being mentioned for the rest of the day. Our fun continued until we were gathered back to the plaza watching the tree, still glowing, to be turned off at the stoke of midnight signaling the end of Christmas. And as the hand of the clock was nearing midnight, in my head, I whispered, "2 more days." And with that, Christmas ended.

* * *

><p>December 26th. That is the current date. The day I know to be the aftermath and the prelude at the same time. I wake up somewhat late, the consequence of sleeping so late, 3 AM to be exact. Miku is still sleeping across from me and I bet Mikuo and Kei are sleeping as well in the room next door as they slept even later than me as they apparently carried me home. During the festival, I felt weary after all the activities we did all day. The group insisted that I rest with the subtle cheers and the soothing carols as my lullaby, cradled in Mikuo's sturdy arms. He was probably the one who carried me all the way home and placed me on the bed, relying on Kei to handle my belongings that I insisted on buying and Miku to change me into my pajamas. At least I hope Miku was the one who changed me. I look over at her and thank her once again, thank all of them, for being such great friends.<p>

Well now, Christmas is over and people will start cleaning up the plaza today. After that Christmas, my best ever Christmas, I feel bad to say good-bye, not willing to wait another year. But I feel reassured by the fact that this will happen again next year, knwing I'll get this feeling of warmth again, with Miku, Kei, and Mikuo. And I feel content with my life.

But as content as I am with my new life, habits of my old life still remain. One of these habits, a tradition of mine actually happens today. It goes back to when I was five turning six, when I was still with my friends, and first learned to write. Len and I were inseparable, to the point it was easily mistaken we were twins. And we enjoyed fooling people to think we were twins as well. We looked quite alike with our flaxen gold hair and cute blue eyes and had a similar petite build. We shared a last name because when I was orphaned, Len's parents, close to my parents, decided to introduce me to their family early on. That's how I ended up meeting Teto and how she willingly let me live with her when my life came crashing down. Because she was another friend of our two families. And to fuel the twin theory, we shared the same birthday, December 27th. Tomorrow. So when we learned to write, as a surprise and a way to boast, Len wrote me a sloppy 'Happy Birthday, Rin' on the stump of our favorite maple tree the day before, the day which would have been today. I found it eagerly and wrote back in reply, 'Happy Birthday, Len'. And ever since then, we would greet each other a happy birthday using that tree for the next couple of years. But even after that tragic event three years ago, I continued our tradition, feeling obligated to, while Len expectedly stopped.

And now I find myself going back, glad the trio before me is still asleep, to that very tree with a knife in hand, to continue my tradition. As soon as I get to it, its branches bare and rustling in the December gale, I kneel down on the blanket of snow. I press my hands delicately against the carved messages. There are 7 written in a sloppy boy's print, Len's, and beside them are 10 written in a delicate cursive, my handwriting. I add yet another message, the eleventh, a message no one is meant to see, saying cheerily, 'Happy 16th birthday Len!" And with that I walk away, my head down low to avoid letting people see the tears caused by my longing to see him again. To see them again. To celebrate our day of birth together. But I have given up on that and right now, I should be glad for the people for the people in my life now. And with that thought, I swiftly raise my head back up, only to find my blue eyes to meet up with another pair of similar blue eyes. Time stood frozen for a moment before it chose to continue and with the help of its friends force and gravity, decided for the two of us to collide, forcing the both of us in the ground. I look up at the individual beneath me, the individual who pillowed my fall. His eyes are shut out of discomfort and a pout managed to work his lips. The individual doesn't seem to recognize me with his eyes closed. But I could recognize him anywhere. Len.

"Ouchies!" He mumbles immaturely. He blinks rapidly before facing me, still in a daze and asks, "What was that for?" Once he realizes who I am his eyes widen and he staggers to get up and regain his 'cool'. I giggle involuntarily, at his behavior which never changed. "R-ri- I m-mean Kagamine!" he tries, key word _tries_, to say nonchalantly. "What are you doing here?"

Despite myself, I giggle reminded of how he used to act as a kid. "I should be asking the same Len-kun."

He looks around nervously, a cute blush on his face, most likely from being humiliated by me, before answering nervously, "I-was just taking a walk, I swear!"

"And I believe you." I answer.

He changes his gaze to the nearby maple tree before flinching and immediately looks at his feet as if it is the most interesting thing in the world. "Soooo..." He sighs, still refusing for our eyes to meet again. "I should be going."

I give him a smile. "Yeah."

And with that, he starts to walk away, leaving me once again. But before I start to head back, Len abruptly turns around and whispers, as if he doesn't want me to hear, "Happy Birthday, Rin."

I turn back to Len, and say, "Likewise." With that, smile and end the day with no more events but spending time with the Hatsunes and Kei, whispering on my way back, "1 more day." One more day until my day of birth. And with that, my day of aftermath and prelude ended.

* * *

><p>December 27th. That is the current date. My birthday. I woke up somewhat late again, surprised not to be woken up by Miku. Actually, when I peek over her bed, I see Miku is nowhere in sight. I trudge over to the boys room, expecting to see Miku harassing either one of them, but to my surprise, none of them are there. With that, I give up looking for them, concluding they must have gone out without me and sleepily go down the stairs hoping for a late breakfast from Teto.<p>

When I go down, I see it is fully dark in the loft. Before I can reach for the light switch, the lights turn on by themselves, completely scaring me. I scream unconsciously, reliving my childhood fear of ghosts but soon my scream is drowned by the sound of merry laughter. I open my eyes and look up to see Teto, Mikuo, and Miku laughing at my sudden scream while Kei watches on, somewhat worriedly. "Surprise?" He lets out. The rest get his signal and simultaneously cheer, "Surprise!"

Kei sighs at their delayed greeting while Miku puffs up. "Look what you did Kei-pon! You ruined our sync!"

Kei just sighs again, replying, "Whatever you say, Miku-chu," learning after spending days with her to just accept her accusations unless you want the same treatment she gives to Mikuo.

"What is all of this?" I ask confused, looking at the decorations littered all over the loft.

"For your birthday, silly!" Teto answers. I look at all of them shocked.

"You remembered?"

"Well, yeah! What kind of friends are we if we didn't?" Miku giggles. I find myself grinning a silly grin before tacking each and every one of them with a hug from the giddy Miku and Teto, to the surprisingly shy Mikuo, to the reluctant Kei.

"Thank you so much, you guys!"

"Here," Teto goes on, leaving the group. She comes back with a gorgeous orange cake decorated with cute little flowers made with frosting and candy. On top is a single candle lit by a delicate flame. "Make a wish."

I walk up to the cake Mikuo, Kei, and Miku at my heels. I marvel at the beauty of the delicate cake. I look over to my loved ones and ponder on yesterday's events. I then decide on my wish. I whisper, "To be reborn." I blow the candle receiving cheers from my group. And with that and other birthday festivities, my day ended.

365 days to go. 365 days when I am reborn. Reborn to a person who is stronger like Miku, Kei, and Mikuo, resolving her own problems independently instead on putting the burden on others no matter how much they volunteer. Reborn to a person who sheds off all her ties to her past, all her petty habits and shameful crimes included. Reborn to a person with friends she will fight with all her life to keep, as they are the most valuable thing she has. Reborn into a person who won't let the torture get to her and reborn to a person who will finally end this cycle of hate. With that wish. I am reborn into a new person, a new Rin Kagamine.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **Now, this chapter I like! It's a major mood change though this will most likely be Rin's overall mood throughout the rest of the story. Cheers for Character Development! Hurray! This chapter really cheered me up and hope it does the same to you guys! It's the length of 2 of my usual chapters! But I seriously love this! I love Miku, Mikuo, Rin, and surprisingly Kei! I didn't expect to like him! And I hope Len isn't as much of an ass in this one! man, a lot happened in this chapter. And I'm really proud of myself! And anyone notice (Teto most definitely did) that Rin's getting herself a harem? Ooh-la-la~! I seriously love all the guys though I still like harassing them! So now starts the RinxLen bonding time for those of you who have been looking for that. I wanted to focus on friendship first, then love and now that Rin has friends, it's time to bring in the romance! *fangirl scream* But let me tell you, friendship will stay as a major if not my main theme throughout this series! Thank you to all of you for supporting me all the way through! If you don't like the mood change, tell me cuz I can don something about it. Cuz Rin isn't the only angsty character in the story *winkwinknudgenudge* Please R&R!

**P.S: **20,000 words! yikes! I still have 21 more chapters left!

**P.S: **I'm considering a beta! Thanks to CluelessLeaf for volunteering, though seriously, you don't need to! I know you're busy with your stories (Go google them, guys! HFC and CC are hilarious!) though tell me what you think of this chappie! And for anyone else included, please PM me if you're interested! I could use all the help I can get!


	10. Unwinding

**A/N: **Here's the next chapter! I'm gonna try to upload the next 5 chapters in the next 2 weeks but, really, don't word me since I have finals and everything else during that time. But now, didn't y'all like that chapter? It was happy! This one will be a little serious compared to the last but now my full cast of characters will finally get personalities other than 'ass' or 'bitch'. Really. Finally.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Vocaloid. Though I'd love to finally see it in English.

Thank you to **_MaxJacksonCullengirl, MusicGamer, Silver Rowdyruff Girl, x-Rinny-Lenny, ReturnoftheWings, Campanella, Sweet Lollita, Bloody Black Rabbit, Tragic Universe, c0baltMiku-san, akichanz, Pomegranata, chibis of evil, Pink Bottle of Kiseki, and CluelessLeaf _**for reviewing! Glad you liked the last chapter!

And thank you to my beloved betas, _**MusicGamer and CluelessLeaf!**_

**Summary: **Memories: They hold the very things we love and the very things we despise. Well, for this girl, Rin Kagamine, her memories are the link, the link that ties everyone and everything, including this story together. First part of the Memories Series! RinxLen

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 9: Unwinding<strong>

**(Rin's POV)**

Luka Megurine. A girl who was a huge part of my former life, serving as one of my most trusted friends who eventually left me, paving the way for me to enter my new life. Throughout my time with her, Luka was always mature, seemingly perfect and motherly. Though after years of time with her, I learned and witnessed the unwinding of her perfect exterior to see a very vulnerable, dependent, lonesome girl who loses herself when she's completely alone. But despite her meekness, she still shares her motherly warmth to everyone to this day, everyone except for…well, me.

Luka Megurine, the girl who now hates me, is currently waiting awkwardly outside my doorstep, fidgeting in my confused stare.

Her visit was, to say the least, surprising and unexpected, by me or my companions who stand next to me, who are fully aware of her meaning in my life, a life they have no idea I am trying to shed. I felt somewhat disturbed by her sudden appearance a day after my oath to change, serving as a memento to my old life, but I pushed the thought out of my mind as soon as I saw the urgency in her face.

"Megurine-san?" I call out, trying my best not to put a single feeling of familiarity in my voice, my first step in rebirth. "What do you need? Did Akita-san send you here?" Her gaze swiftly changes from the ground to straight into my eyes – which are refusing to betray another emotion besides confusion – then back to the ground again in a panicked flurry because of my sudden confidence and apathy.

Truthfully, I'm shocked of my voice as well. And looking at the fearful frown on Luka's delicate face, I feel guilty that I'm testing my first stage on her, the emotionally weakest. I feel like I'm picking on the weak and willing, and I hate it, even though that was what described myself just two days ago.

She meets my gaze, as well as the looks Miku, Mikuo, and Kei are giving her, and mumbles, "Y-yes… Neru-san asked me to call you over s-so we can discuss the festival..." She eyes Miku and I cautiously. "After, y-you know, the first ended in a b-bust."

I sigh despite myself. I knew the time would come eventually, though I certainly did not mind putting off our eventual meeting as much as I could. Now, I just need to mentally and emotionally prepare myself to the upcoming trial of my will.

"Okay..." I let out dejectedly. I suddenly look down at my overly casual pajamas compared to Luka's elegant skirt and bolero. "Just let us get prepared first." She nods weakly and turns to back off, looking as lost as ever in the dove white snow, and before I notice it, I hear my voice calling out to her, "Would you like to come in and wait for us in there?"

She turns around, looking surprised but relieved, and mumbles out an agreement before treading inside with us. Miku gives me a look of apprehension and whispers discreetly, "Rin, are you sure you know what you're doing? They could threaten you again."

I give her a reassuring smile and reply, "I'm sure. I mean, I have you, Mikuo, and Kei-kun to protect me, right?"

Miku smirks and comments, "I wouldn't rely on those two sissies too much. They bruise easily; I should know." I giggle as I head upstairs with Miku and the boys to get dressed, leaving Luka in the loft with a cup of tea.

When we return, fully dressed for the cold, we see Luka roaming around the living room in a daze, observing pictures on the wall and little trinkets of mine scattered on the floor. Confused, I call out to her, "Megurine-san?" She turns to us, a blush lining her face, totally embarrassed for snooping.

"I-I'm sorry, Ri- er, Kagamine-san," She looks at me meekly. "I was just curious about where you live now. We kind of missed being neighbo-" She stops herself from traveling into that emotional road of our memories and I do the same, putting the reminders of my past into the back of my mind. "W-well, we're all ready…why don't we h-head out?" Luka tries to recover swiftly, bent on letting go of the previous events.

I agreed and with that, we were out into the cold, anticipating what would come next. We followed Luka toward our destination - a café - the whole trip lined with the conversations between the Hatsune twins. But despite that, Luka and I stayed silent the whole way, afraid for both of our sakes to let our memories unravel.

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><p>We reached the dainty, little cafe after a few minutes of walking in the snow. I kept my eyes on the ground, anxious of the coming meeting. To my confusion, Luka seemed anxious of the following meeting as well. Our gazes met more than once, though I convinced myself not to care. <em>I'm not supposed to care anymore, <em>I repeat to myself.

I look up at the first time and take in my surroundings. What I see is a cute boutique-like café – small, yellow, and cozy, with a banner reading 'Eien Cafe'. Though I've neither seen nor heard about the cafe before concluding that it was a new addition to the neighborhood, the area we stand in is so familiar to me. The cafe is located in the elite part of town, apparent with the larger houses with their well-kept yards and high iron fences in plain sight. Of course they would choose a place like this. It's convenient for them and it's a way to show how superior they are to us. And it might have been accidental, but by choosing this place, it also mocks me, giving me the haunting feeling that I'll never be able to move on, for even after all that happened, I am back to my former residence, waiting to serve them yet again with not even a welcome in greeting.

I look through the window and I see them: Kaito, Meiko, Gakupo. Neru, and Len, huddled near a couch, oblivious of our presence outside the shop. Kaito and Len have huge ice cream sundaes despite the cold and are scarfing them down without a care - most likely competing on who can eat the fastest, a tradition the two have been keeping up for years. Gakupo has a hot coffee and is cheering for them to continue, pounding the table and chanting in beat. Meiko has a devilish grin as she suddenly grabs Kaito's head and shoves him into his bowl causing him to get ice cream all over his face and on the floor. Kaito laughs it off and grabs a napkin to wipe his face before continuing. Len suddenly tenses up as he bolts upright with a grimace and he appears to whine holding his head, most likely because of brain freeze. Neru looks at Len worriedly and cautiously pats his head, stroking his hair with a slight blush on her face. She looks so different than what she usually does; she looks more carefree, happy, and even shy.

Looking at the scene, I couldn't help but feel nostalgic; I was reminded of all our escapades as little children. I remember picnics we had at the park, trips we collectively took to the beach, and jumping into leaf piles in autumn. I imagine myself in Neru's place, once again by their sides. I would be the one rubbing Len's head in an effort to calm him. I would be the one cheering for Kaito, for it would be obvious he would win. I would be the one giggling at the boys' immaturity, feeling refreshed by it. I would be the one with them.

NO,_ Rin! No! _I scold myself. _I can't be with them. That time is over and I need to get over it. I need to stop thinking these stupid thoughts. I promised myself I would let go of the past. I have a new life. _I take a deep breath as I continuously repeat that statement in my head. _And I've got to show them that I'm over them._

And with that, I walked past Kei, Mikuo, Miku, and Luka, who have been eyeing me concernedly, and walked right through the door, hearing the ring of the bell sound in my ears.

I am met with five cold gazes as a greeting. The laughter dies down as well as the mirth, instead being replaced by the masks of indifference they usually wear. I meet their gaze for once, proudly and defiantly hold my ground, refusing to be pushed yet again. Kei, Miku, and Mikuo find their way behind me, ready to defend me at moment's notice, though I wouldn't let them. This is my battle. Even if I end up beaten or bruised physically or emotionally, I would still end up victorious as I would have still gotten past them.

I see in the corner of my eye Luka awkwardly trotting to the other side of the room where they are and try to grab Gakupo's attention with a light tap. Gakupo nonchalantly shrugs her off, keeping all his focus on me. For a moment I alter my gaze to meet Luka's and see her emotions unwind. I see the loneliness, uncertainty, and rejection lingering in her eyes, and I get the feeling that this has happened before - that she has been ignored and shrugged off before because of her lack of cruelty. And I'm sad to say that I know those feelings all too well.

And because of those feelings, I find myself trudging over to her nonchalantly, past the incredulous glares of the five individuals of front of her. I shrug past Kaito and Meiko, not caring to even peek at their facial expressions, knowing they would show shock and offence respectively. I look at Neru's insulted glare for a second before I shrug her off as well, effectively challenging her superiority. I allow myself to bump into Len's frame, still as ice, causing him to flinch at our touch as if he touched a rod of electricity. I ignore Gakupo completely and focus my attention fully on Luka.

"Thank you for your assistance, Megurine-san." I say in a kind, innocent voice. "Though I think it's a shame, for after doing the unbearable by helping me, your reward is to be shrugged off like you were." I sigh dramatically. My voice never loses its pep as I say, "Though I'd hate to say it, but your efforts have been in vain, for while you've been a polite hostess as expected, I sense that I'm unwelcome here by everyone else and it'd be better if I just take our leave." I look at the insulted face of the crowd before us and Luka's shocked face.

"W-wait, what!" Luka stammers. "What about the festival?"

I giggle a giggle similar to Miku's and answer, "Well, I'll just do what I intended from the start and believe in the talents of Akita-san in taking care of the festival. Akita-san, you'd be able to take care of it, right?" I ask sweetly to Neru.

She huffs defiantly as she answers a haughty, "Of course!"

"Okay, then. That would mean you wouldn't need us then. In that case, we'll take our leave," I say matter-of-factly. And with that, I leave them, pulling along a shocked Kei and Mikuo and a giggling Miku with me, proclaiming this encounter ended in my sweet victory.

We left in a huff, rushing to leave before one of them can follow us to leave a comment. When we're out of the elite area, we stop to catch our breaths.

Miku then giggles before commenting, "Wow, Rinny! You sure gave them a piece of your mind."

Kei continues worriedly, "Really, Rin. What were you thinking? Aren't those the people that go out of their way to try and hurt you?"

Miku motions right next to me and says to the exasperated Kei, "Lighten up, Kei-pon. What Rin did was badass." Cue Miku's signature giggle.

I laugh along with her and answer Kei proudly, "I just wanted to stand up to them for once." I give Kei a smile which he reddens to. Probably because of the wind. "So no need to worry!"

Mikuo pipes up, "Sure Rin, you were great standing up for yourself, don't get me wrong. But just don't be too much like Miku. I swear, that giggle, as hot as it sounds on you, is just a little creepy on her."

I find myself laughing as Miku of course proceeds to abuse her twin. As soon as Miku finished punishing her brother, she casually asks, "So where are we off to now?"

"I need to go home for a while..." Kei comments. "Just to get things I need for the rest of the week. I'll just meet up with you guys later."

"I think we should do the same, sis," Mikuo suggests after recovering from Miku's strikes.

"Awww... I don't wanna leave Rinny alone!" Miku complains.

I assure her that it's okay, and soon enough, the three of them leave me alone after promising to meet up later on. I use this time to just drift and ponder over the current events. Looking back, a lot happened over the last month. I met Miku, Mikuo, and Kei, who would inspire me to change my life. I was volunteered to handle a festival with the very people who I associate the festival with. I promised myself to be a new person. And just recently, I succeeded in my first steps. And I couldn't be prouder of myself.

While lost in my train of thought, I found myself in front of a familiar looking house. Somehow, I ended up back in the elite area. Despite my common sense saying to just leave before I get confronted, my curiosity piques when I see two familiar figures at the doorway of the house. The boy had long exotic hair while the girl's pink hair flows along her curiosity overtakes me as I get closer to hear the two talk.

"Can you believe what that Kagamine did at the cafe?" Gakupo inquires. "She insulted all of us with that little stunt, Lu."

Luka sighs tiredly. "It wasn't that bad, Gaku. And can you call her Rin? She does have a name and it's hard to tell sometimes whether you're talking about her or Len." Luka turns so she faces Gakupo directly and changes the subject. "Hey, thanks for walking me home."

Gakupo just mumbles in response.

Luka looks at him for a long while before taking a deep breath. Her face flushes red as she breaths out, "Gaku, ar-are y-you busy t-tomorrow? Cuz if y-you're not, I-I was hoping we c-could go out and eat t-t-together." Luka turns even redder though by the looks of it, Gakupo didn't hear a singe thing after being occupied by his own thoughts. "S-so, Gaku, w-what do you s-say?"

He would say yes. He has to. He and Luka have been friends longer than any of us has been. They've alway been together ever since they were born. The two were naturally close despite being different as Luka was ladylike and poised and Gakupo was carefree and laid-back. But despite this, it was as if the two were destined to be together and it only proved true when Luka developed a crush on Gakupo at the age of 6. It was kind of like how Len and I were inseparable. We would do everything together like them, except that there was nothing romantic ever between me and Len. Len never liked me or at least made his feelings clear and for all I knew, I didn't like him either. But even if I did, at this point it would be impossible to have a relationship with him, unlike Gakupo and Luka who's just a few baby steps away from getting there.

Gakupo looks up into the sky and sighs. After a while, he looks back at Luka and gives her an answer: a curt yes. Luka was of course overjoyed and rushed back inside her house ecstatic. I smile to myself even though I'm supposed to let go of this; things like this are safe to enjoy.

The next day went by in a blur. The Hatsunes and Kei returned before me last night and we enjoyed another night with each other. The day continued on with a visit to the marketplace recently stripped of the holiday decor. I expected to be confronted by Neru or one of her group, judging by yesterday and Gakupo's individual reaction, but surprisingly - and thankfully - no one came. By 8:00, the four of us were already home. Before I could go to bed, Teto called me down to ask me to go to the post office and deliver a letter to her husband Ted, who was away in the military. I agreed since I loved Ted as much as Teto, thinking of him as my surrogate father, just as I thought of Teto as a mother.

On my way back from the post office, little flakes of snow started falling from the sky. I found myself giggling and once again running and playing in the snow. The wind picked up and I ran with it, giving me the feeling that made me feel I was soaring in the air. It seemed that nothing could stop me until I reached a quaint playground.

There, I saw her. She was on the swing her hanging face covered by her rose colored hair, which, by the looks of it, were at one point arranged in a gorgeous bun but was messily rearranged and covered with snow for some reason. Her dress, a gray a line dress with a white shawl, would have looked gorgeous on her amazing body if not for being drenched to the bone by the snow and the bottom being partially torn from what looks like running. Past her wall of hair, her makeup was arranged perfectly until tears pitifully falling from her eyes ruined it. All in all, Megurine Luka, the girl with a perfect exterior, looked broken, inside and out.

I cautiously move over to her, no longer feeling in the mood to run around in the snow, and instead wanting to help her out. As much as I shouldn't be doing this, I have to since I can't stand to see any of them hurt again, even if they hurt me. And judging from how she looks and acts, Luka is hurt terribly. She remains oblivious to my presence until I sit down on the swing next to her, after which she jumps up, startled, as her eyes meet up with mine. What I see in her eyes is just what her body language tells me: hurt.

She looks down again, feeling vulnerable and weak under my gaze. I bring the tip of my finger and push up her face so she faces me. "Megurine-san, why are you out here in the cold?"

Luka looks at me straight in the eye, not answering me yet, most likely having an inner conflict on whether she should tell me, an individual who she lost trust for years ago. But just looking at her, any more conflict would be too much for her as tears spill out of her eyes and so do her feeble explanation: "Gakupo, h-he never came..."

Anyone else would have been confused by her minimal words. For me, however, it's enough. From those four words, she told me about the whole situation: that Gakupo never came for her, never even called. That she's been waiting out here in the cold all of this time and ran away in tears when she's given up hope. That, right now, her heart is broken by the boy she's been with forever. And because I'm the only person, I know, I'm also the only person who can make things better.

I give her a hug, shocking her, and whisper comfortingly in her ear, "It's okay, Luka-chan." I don't even bother with impersonal formalities because this moment is as personal as it could be. "It's okay, it's okay. Gakupo-san probably just forgot. You know how he's like..." I do my best to comfort her by making excuses for Gakupo though I know they are untrue. And she does as well.

Which causes her to ask me this next question. "Why?" The desperation in her question was just like the desperation I had just a few weeks ago. So I know exactly what she's asking for. And just like Miku did to me those few weeks ago, I would do to Luka.

"Because I still care for you after all these years." I let out the unedited truth that would be more than enough to answer her question. She looks at me shocked, and before she can say anything else, I continue. "And before you ask why, it's because I never got over you guys, the past." I look away from her for a moment before I can finally say something I've been trying to deny this whole time. "I don't think I can ever get over the past..."_ Since it keeps coming back to me, _I thought bitterly.

Luka's sobbing into me now, and I let her do as she pleases. She tries to regain herself as she lets out, "I-I missed you Rin. I missed you so much!" She tries to stop her cries and continues, "We've never been the same without you Rin." She looks deep in my eyes and I see desperation in hers. She whimpers in a ghostly wail, "I need you back into my life, Rin. I need you! Rin, please..."

I stare deep into her eyes, her doorway to her soul and all I see is true honesty. And just I was about to agree to go back into her life, I am reminded of my promise to be reborn into a stronger person. And it is because of that reminder that I make my choice.

"No," I say quietly with a thoughtful smile on my face. With my rejection, Luka's face only contorts to make her look even more hopeless, even more lost. But just as she was about to leave in defeat, I call out, "Luka-chan, you didn't let me finish." She looks back at me bewildered while I offer her a smile.

"I won't go back to the past, because all that'll show is that I'm still weak and resentful. And I'm not anymore. But just because I'm not gonna crawl back into my memories, doesn't mean I won't be by your side." I look at her shocked face and think_Yes, this is right. Making amends with the past is just another way to get over it. _I take a deep breath and continue, "So that's why I want us to start over. To start our friendship new as total strangers and just rebuild our old relationship into a new, stronger one without the baggage of our past. So what do you say?"

Without hesitation, she goes up and hug me declaring a multitude of "Yes, Rin, Yes!" towards me. And at this very moment, I felt so many things unwind. All the doubts of forever being stuck in the past cleared from my head. Fear of my future caused by my past subsided as well. But most of all, I felt all of Luka's hate and resentment towards me unwind, allowing us space to start anew.

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><p><strong>AN: **Gosh guys, sorry for the lateness! This took a lot longer than what I planned! It's just been so hectic for me recently! I wanna thank all of you for reviewing and just hope you forgive me~! R&R!


	11. Cowardice

**A/N: **I'm BAAAACK! Sorry again for the irregular updates! I have no good excuse but laziness this time (and well, I had to go away for the weekend for Father's Day). Also, I had no idea how to open this chapter after the events of the last one. But I reached a hundred reviews! I never thought I'd get this far and it's because of you guys! I love all my readers so, SO much! Luckily, summer vacation is here and I'd get tons of updates up! But I'm glad you guys like Luka. She's really big in the series (and so is everyone else) Well, I also have another story idea up posted on my profile but don't worry. I won't stop the series just for that. It'll probably be an in between project or even be written when this series is done! It's just there to improve my writing! Check it out and tell me if you're actually interested ; )! For now, enjoy this next chappie guys!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Vocaloid. Though I'd love to finally see it in English.

Thank you to **_MaxJacksonCullengirl, MusicGamer, Silver Rowdyruff Girl, x-Rinny-Lenny, ReturnoftheWings, aira2889, Campanella, Sweet Lollita, davison, BloodyBlackRabbit, Tragic Universe, akichanz, Pomegranata, chibis of evil, The Decereo Sisters, Silent Affair, and CluelessLeaf _**for reviewing! Reached 100 because of you guys *sqeals* /died and went to writer's heaven ; )

And thank you to my precious betas, _**MusicGamer and CluelessLeaf! **_Loved the ideas you gave and what you did to the last chapter! I seriously love you!

**Summary: **Memories: They hold the very things we love and the very things we despise. Well, for this girl, Rin Kagamine, her memories are the link, the link that ties everyone and everything, including this story together. First part of the Memories Series! RinxLen

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><p><strong>Chapter 10: Cowardice<strong>

**(Rin's POV)**

Kaito Shion. With his messy mop of blue hair and his impulsive way of acting, many would call him an idiot. Though _I_ would think otherwise. Instead, I, and few others who know him like I do, would instead call him a coward. And the only way I know this is because I was a coward myself. With that common bond, we faced our fears together in the past, creating a strong friendship between the two of us. But mishaps, lies, and rumors caused that friendship to deteriorate leaving me alone to face my fears in solitude with denial of my fears serving as my only means of survival. But recent events taught me not to deny my problems, instead I should confront them, make amends with them. And now, I can no longer deny that my biggest fear, my main source of cowardice over the past few years, is happening. I can no longer deny my fear of my past, the past I have been trying to shed off, coming back to haunt me. And the individuals in front of me prove it.

Kaito Shion, the boy who fed me to my fears, is the second memento of my past, currently standing in the foyer of my apartment complex, bringing the company of a very anxious Len Kagamine.

What brought me trudging back to my old life I've been scared of all along? I look at the pink haired maiden next to me, sporting a very weary expression on her face, for the answer. _It's all because of her._ I look at the three of them and myself, individuals looking so familiar and at the same time, so unfamiliar. _It's because I just can't get over them... _I look over all of us once again, though this time as a group instead of individuals. It all seems so natural, meant to be, despite the hostility. I smile._ ...And it's because they can't get over me either._

After yesterday's events, I finally managed to calm Luka's frantic sobs, and decided to take her home since she was in no state to go home all by herself nonetheless go back to a home so near to your source of misery. I pulled the wet and freezing Luka up and I urged her to follow me home, comforting her all the way. As soon as I arrived, I pushed the door open with my hand holding on strongly at the dejected Luka, and called out to Teto for help.

Instead, Miku came out into the foyer in her pajamas, without really paying attention to what was in front of her, specifically, not paying attention to Luka. "Rinny, Teto's already sleeping. Said she needed to wake up-" Miku abruptly ended her sentence as soon as she saw me with a panicked expression etched on my face and Luka, slumping next to me, looking very pale from the cold.

I took advantage of her moment of shock to speak as I quickly got Luka inside the house where it was warmer. "Miku, do you have any spare clothes Luka-chan can borrow? And do you think Teto'll let Luka stay over for the night? I'll explain later, I promise, but right now, she's freezing."

Miku dazed, sensed my urgency and nods unsurely, replying "Umm... Teto won't mind but... umm..." Miku took a deep breath as of she's willing for her uncertainty to go away. "Just take her by the fireplace while I get clothes so she can dry up. Make Mikuo and Kei-pon get blankets for her too. She looks really pale." With that, she hurriedly went up to get clothes she promised. I gave her a smile and thanked her, for her clothes, her sudden compassion for Luka, and the trust she has for me.

I pulled the very pale Luka towards the loft where Kei-kun and Mikuo were currently watching TV. Shock was evident on their faces as Mikuo questioned, "Rinny, what's she doing her-"

Before he could even finish his question, I seated Luka right in front of the fireplace, hoping she would get warmer. I looked at both boys in front of me and commented, "Guys, can you do me a favor and get towels and blankets. Luka-chan looks really sick."

Mikuo looked like he was about to press further though he was cut off by Kei-kun who dragged him away, giving me a simple but reassuring nod in response. Meanwhile I went to the kitchen and got Luka a cup of tea from the teapot Teto prepared for me when I returned. I poured her some and brushed her hair out of her face.

She smiled weakly and muttered, "Thank you Rin-chan. Really, you're doing too much for me. I don't deserve what you're doing to me."

I smiled back, and replied "It's okay Luka-chan. Anything to keep you from getting hurt or sick. You're staying here the night okay? I wouldn't want you to go home yourself."

"Oh, no Rin! I'll just be a burden!" Luka replied in a weak whisper.

I winked at her and simply responded, "You're not a burden. You're a friend." This gave Luka the smile I had been trying to coax out of her.

Soon Miku came back with clothes, just another pair of pajamas, and I ushered Luka to get changed in the bathroom. Only when she got there did Miku send me an apprehensive look. "What is she doing here, Rinny? You promised me an explanation."

I answered, "She was stood up." Miku looked confused for a moment before finally realizing the predicament, exactly why I was showing so much compassion towards her. I was glad Miku was the first one I had to provide with an explanation as she would be able to sympathize Luka and understand even a little bit of the grief she must be going through. I nodded remorsefully, continuing, "And not just by any guy, a guy she's been in love with since she was a kid."

Miku spoke out with anger that made her seem as if she were the victim. "Well that's just horrible! What kind of ass would do that to a childhood friend! Childhood friend romances don't work that way! Those relationships are supposed to be built on the trust the individuals have for each other from childhood! Poor girl! She must feel sick!" At that moment, I thanked Miku's crazy romantic side as because if that, she fully sympathized for Luka and by the looks of it, be more than willing to help her.

Luka coincidentally stumbled out of the bathroom just as Mikuo and Kei came back with blankets. One look at Miku's very _agitated_ posture and her brother smirked, inquiring, "Why the tantrum, sis? Is it _that_ time of the month?"

This sent Miku flaring, red with both embarrassment and fury but instead of pounding at Mikuo like usual, she instead just harshly grabbed the blankets away from the boys, looped her arms securely around me and the overwhelmed Luka, and rushed us upstairs, yelling, "Because boys are all just assholes!" With that, she slammed the door, sure to confuse Mikuo and Kei below us.

When we arrived in the room, Miku let out a shrill, annoyed yell to vent her frustrations. Under her breath, she mumbled out a string of profanities about her twin, Kei, and the male population in general. Only when her rant was done did she remember that Luka was with us, somewhat scared of Miku's violent vibe radiating off her. "Oh, I'm sorry Luka-chan but it's just that that idiot always pisses me off! I should be worried about your well being!"

Luka shook her head, "Oh, no need to worry, Hatsu-"

"Miku-chan." Miku assured Luka with a grin. Luka just nodded incredulously in return. Miku's grin turned to a frown of worry. "Now, I think you had a long day. Maybe we should just go to sleep. You can take my bed; I'll sleep on the couch."

Then it's my turn to object. "Miku, I can't let you do that! I was the one who brought Luka here so I should be the one who-"

Luka cut me off saying, "Rin, Miku, you both shouldn't have to sleep there. You've both been too kind for me so the least I can do is to sleep on the couch!"

Miku just released a sigh, shaking her head, making her teal locks sway. "Gosh, you two worry too much. _I'll_ be the one sleeping at the couch. Luka-chan, you need a good bed to sleep in with your condition and Rinny, I wouldn't want my idiotic, perverted brother to get anywhere near you at night. And anyway, that'll give you guys time to talk." And with that, Miku walked out the door before the two of us could say anything else.

"She really is something," Luka breathed out, obviously referring to Miku.

This causes me to giggle. "She sure is." I looked at Luka, concerned yet again. "So how are you doing?"

"I'm good really, Rin-chan." Luka tried to convince me of her well being with a forced, strained smile on her face. This only worried me more though I drop the subject, respecting her by not forcing her to talk if she doesn't want to. I just sigh at her persistence.

"Well, you should get some rest to make sure. If you ever need anything, I'll always be right here for you, 'kay?" I said to her as I positioned myself on my bed. Luka on the other hand remained still.

"Always...There..." Luka frowned staring at space before averting her gaze back to me putting on that strained smile yet again. "Thank you, Rin-chan. I-I'm too weak to be alone."

I glanced at her meaningfully, bringing myself into a sitting position. "No worries, Luka-chan." I took a while before I continued, daring myself to bring up the past. Looking straight into her eyes in a intense daze, I reminisced, "Remember, when we were young? I said that I would always have your back." I pause seeing if Luka recalled my memory. To my surprise, a single tear drop fell from her face, still faking happiness, unchanged from her fake smile. Her eyes showed nothing but remembrance. I smiled comfortingly and took the liberty of wiping her tear. "Well, I still do. Nothing's changed."

Luka's face glowed with happiness as she finally soothed her posture, letting herself show. "I owe you so much." Luka began to lie down and bury herself in the blankets provided for her. She faced me one final time before whispering, "But I'll be sure to pay you back."

I ended up sleeping soundly, glad for cheering up Luka-chan but still a bit perplexed about the recent events. _The past sure comes when you least expect it. I just hope I have enough courage to face it head on. _With that, I ended the night comforted by my dreams, hearing a lullaby of fireworks, reminiscent and foretelling at the same time.

I woke up to the nonstop ringing on the doorbell. I opened my eyes groggily to see Luka's dreamworld was disturbed as well. We glanced sleepily at each other before I bothered to get up and get the door before the doorbell woke everyone else. Luka just wearily followed. The sight I saw past the door definitely woke me up; Luka, too. And as I tried to process the thoughts in my head, my thoughts from last night flash in my mind. _The past sure comes when you least expect it. _That is true looking at the two individuals in front of me here at the break of dawn. _I just hope I have enough courage to take it on._ But looking at one of their intense glances, I am sure that this is my time for my courage to be tested.

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><p>I had more than enough time to recall the previous events in the long awkward silence we experienced when I let them in the foyer, just staring at each other, the four of us, not saying a word. I finally had enough and decide to break the silence.<p>

"Ummm.. What are you guys doing here?" I mumble.

Len and Kaito jump from my question and look at each other, seemingly scared of my harmless question.

"L-Luka-chan" Len stammers, his voice cracking going high. He doesn't meet my gaze but he explains in a rush, "We were looking for Luka-chan, nobo- nothing else."

"Ummm... yeah." Kaito continues to elaborate confused by Len's skittishness, "We couldn't find Luka-chan last night so, umm, we came here looking. I, uhh, just had a hunch she'd be here... with you."

Even Luka, who has a friendly relation with each of us in the room, seems uncomfortable. "Uhh, thanks, I guess guys."

The awkward silence continues with none of us having a thing to say. It felt like an eternity until I heard an upstairs door creak open. All four of us turn our attention on the staircase in our line of sight, having nothing else to do. We listen to the delicate footsteps draw closer and start to hear a tune being whistled the closer the footsteps are. Soon we see the figure of Teto on the top of the staircase, prancing around in the morning. She looks up and notices me standing at the foyer, giving her a look a surprise.

"Oh, Rinners! I didn't expect you to be up this early! Aww, I guess I couldn't surprise you with breakfast this morning like I planned..." Teto, pouts, talking solely to me. When she notices the crowd, she calls out, "Oh, we have company?" She inspects the three next to me before exclaiming, "Oh, my! Is that my Lenny-kins? And Kai-kun and Lulu-chan? What are all of you doing here?"

I take the opportunity to answer before any of them could. "Oh, Teto, umm, Luka stayed the night since she was, umm... sick! and Kaito and Len just came to pick her up! I hope you didn't mind!"

Teto gives me an amused expression. "Of course not dear! I haven't seen you guys together in a while! My~! Kai-kun you're so tall now! And you, too Lulu-chan. You really matured, if you know what I mean." Kaito and Luka fidget in Teto's inspection. "And Lenny-kins! All your baby fat went away!" She walks up directly to Len who blushed, redder than a tomato. He only gets redder as Teto pinches his cheek. "But at least your cheeks are still nice and chubby! Your face is still as cute as ever!"

Len gets redder if possible and _whines_ "T-Teto-sannn... Stop itttt..."

Teto doesn't relent and tightens her grip. "Awww... Lenny-kins. You need to stop whining! Rinners, you try squeezing them!"

Lens eyes grow wide as saucers and he starts flailing under Teto. He stammers, still blushing, "N-no, Rin-tan! I-I mean R-Rin-san D-don't t-t-touch!"

I look at the scene in front of me: Teto squeezing Len's face excitedly, usher me to join. Len, red as a cherry, looking helpless and flailing around whining. Luka standing at the sidelines utterly confused. Kaito right next to her just as confused but looking curious as well. And all of a sudden, I'm laughing uncontrollably over the insanity of the scene in front of me. I hear giggles that aren't my own and looks and see that Luka joined in as well. Kaito and Teto join us soon after while Len pouts in the corner once free of Teto's death grip.

With all the commotion happening, Miku, who is in the loft in the room next to us, trudges our way sleepily. She looks up, not fully awake yet and asks, "What's going on here?" She takes a look at Kaito and Len for a minute before a look of disdain comes to her face. "Ugh, more boys. What are they doing here?"

This makes Len stop pouting and answer, "To pick up Luka up. And I think it's time we go."

Teto, not wanting them to go yet, calls out, "Awww... so soon? Why don't you stay for at least breakfast. I'll make a feast since we have so much to catch up on. Come on!"

Just as Len looked like he was going to refuse Teto's offer, Kaito speaks up first. Remaining stationary, he calls out, "Sure we'd love to stay," with a thoughtful grin, shocking Len, Luka, and me.

To say Teto was thrilled is an understatement. She rang out in a sing-song voice, "Okay, then! I'd better start cookin'! Would any of you guys like to help?"

All of us agree quickly, aware that if we didn't we'd be left in the awkward silence we faced before. When we arrive at the kitchen, Luka, our resident cook, asks, "Teto, what will we cook?"

Teto ponders for a minute before emerging with a brilliant smile. "Parfaits! They're easy to make and they're super delicious!"

Len perks up considerably, his eyes growing wide, a big contrast from his previous mopey attitude. "A-a parfait?" He inquires excitedly.

Teto smirks at him. "Yup, your favorite right?"

Len nods ecstatically and jumps up and down like a kid. Luka, Kaito, and I shake our heads bemusedly but for some reason, Miku just stares at Len, deep in thought. Suddenly, her head bolts upright as if she found a revelation. She creeps up behind Len and squeezes his cheek, the same cheek Teto was squeezing moments ago. Len winced in pain. Miku looks at him with a sadistic smile.

"Who would have known? You're a shota!" Len stares at her wide-eyed while Luka bursts out laughing, dropping her collected exterior. Kaito and I join in while Teto let out an amused giggle.

"I-I'm not!" Len retaliates.

Miku stares on, completely amused. "Whatever you say, honey-boo. Now let's start cooking before shota-kun here starts whining."

"Agreed," Teto replies. Despite Len's complaining, we whip up breakfast pretty quickly with all the help. There were more than enough parfaits for everybody, even with Len's huge appetite, not to mention for the very hungry boy surely still sleeping upstairs with the name of Mikuo Hatsune. We placed the food on the table, and took out seats, Miku, Teto and I taking our usual seats and Kaito and Luka sitting next to Teto's two sides. Len was about to take the seat next to Kaito on the far side of the table but Teto called out, "Oh, Lenny, why are you sitting all the way over there. The seat next to Rinners in open. Mikuo-kun won't mind." Len looked apprehensive but by now knows not to object to neither Teto nor Miku. So he took the seat next to me.

Unfortunately though, this was the moment Mikuo Hatsune sped his way to the kitchen, enticed by the smell of food. As soon as their eyes met, disdain flashed through of them, like a bolt of lightning, Mikuo's eyes claiming his territory while Len's defiant. The glaring contest continued until Kei strolled down the steps, slapping Mikuo on the side of his head, positioning for him to move out of his way. Mikuo glared at him before moving into the kitchen, eyes planted on Len. Both boys took a glance at me then at the chair, before Mikuo spoke up. "What is _he _doing here, in my chair, nonetheless?"

"Eating," Len replied icily, taking a bite from his parfait, his tone defiant and mocking at the same time. Everyone in the table traded questioning glances. I, especially was confused. Why fight over a chair? Which was exactly what I uttered.

"Guys, why fight over something silly like a chair. There are more you can pull up?"

I received amused glances from everyone besides Mikuo and Len. They were still too busy having an imaginary argument. Miku finally let out her signature giggle. "Shota-kun and my idiotic twinnie, huh? This'll be interesting. Especially with Rinny in the middle."

I stare at her for a while with the silence continuing. Finally, Teto got bored of the tranquility and changed the subject. "So, it's nice to have you guys back. I haven't seen you in, like, forever. Why'd you stop visiting my Rinners and me?"

This comment managed to still Luka, Kaito, and I and even distract Len from his feud with Mikuo. The three of them send glances at my direction speaking a thousand words, words I shy away to or try to ignore. Each of those glances are asking me 'Why, why exactly after everything, have I not told anybody?'

I refuse to answer and I'm sure the others would as well. Teto doesn't need to hear. Teto doesn't need to worry about problems we're hiding. Teto doesn't need to think of the kids she helped raised as cruel monsters, or guilty victims. That's what I thought, but to my surprise, someone thought otherwise. "Because we abandoned her." the voice let out steadily. I bolt my head to the speaker shocked and gape at him my own eyes filling with question. _Why?_

_Why Kaito-kun? _

His gaze is planted on mine wearing a sincerely remorseful smile. He doesn't notice the looks Luka and Len send him, signalling him to stop, punishing his foolishness, or my expression, one of pure confusion, one of pure fear. He continues, his gaze on me unmovable, "We abandoned her, and only now do we realize what a mistake that was." He then avert his gaze shamefully, inspecting the faces of everyone in the room. He clears his throat nervously as he excuses himself swiftly.

I spring up quickly, determined to follow him, determined to find out what brought that outburst to come out of him. I follow him outside, where the snow is still falling serenely. Before I get the chance to ask, Kaito already starts explaining, his back turned to me.

"Rin-san, I'm a coward. I'm nothing but a coward." He turns around and lets me see his face, wearing a look if pure remorse. "I've been trying so hard to get over my fears though I just can't." He looks at his feet nervously for a moment before facing up once again, this time with a sorry smile. "You, even when you were alone with no one to help you, you got over your fears before me." He laughs a humorless chuckle. "You couldn't imagine how jealous I was of you in the cafe. You stood up to us with no problem. You were so brave... and I was jealous of that."

He takes a long sigh trying to rid of his inner turmoil. "You know how much of a coward I was Rin-san? I was so cowardly that even after I stopped believing all they said about you, I couldn't even tell you because I was too scared of everyone getting mad at me. So I was pathetic enough to let you suffer alone."

He takes a step toward me and squeezes his hands between mine. "I just wish I could have told you sooner about how much we missed you. About how we always have to fake happiness in front of the school. About how it hurts having to pretend to hurt you. About how it's never been the same without you..." Kaito sighs again. "But I didn't. I really didn't expect Luka-chan to be here. I just used that as an excuse to try to talk to you. And even after that, honestly, I wasn't going to tell you today either. I was too scared. But seeing how you let Luka-chan back into your life so willingly, it motivated me. Gave me even a little bit of hope that you'd accept me back. So I promised to get braver, braver for your sake. Brave enough to stay by your side no matter what. But I just ended up looking like an idiot..."

I take a long look at Kaito, my face emotionless and unreachable. I ask him quietly, capriciously "Kaito-kun, what if I told you all of those things said about me were true? Would you still try to stay by my side, knowing that?"

He blinks at me surprised for a moment before answering, "Yes, of course, Rin-san."

Hearing this, my steel mask breaks and I give him a genuine smile. "Then you have nothing to worry about Kaito-kun. You aren't a coward anymore. That's the bravest thing anyone could do for me." With that said, I swivel facing inside once again. "Now let's go. We wouldn't want Len-kun and Mikuo to finish all the food!"

Kaito just follows me and laughs. "Okay, Rin-san."

Before we knew it, our meal ended, and soon, Len's complaints of wanting to go home reached everyone's limit and the three individuals were on their way home. Even after I finished saying my farewells and even after Teto, Miku, Mikuo, and Kei returned back into the house to sadly prepare for our upcoming third trimester, I still remained outside staring at the backs of my former friends, friends who I regained. And it's only then do I accept that my worst fear is happening; that my past really is coming back. But I think in my head _Am I still scared? _I use the same concept I used in Kaito. _If it did come back, would I be able to accept it?_ I smile, realizing I already made my answer. Yes.

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><p><strong>AN: **I know I suck, I suck so much! I atcually started typing since Monday but couldn't finish until now! Really, TsundereMe? 2 weeks? Thank you to all of those who had to hear me mope about my writer's block DX! Especially after you guys just made me reach a 100. But really, I couldn't think of any dialogue for Len and Kaito! Ugh! Yeah, I really do write girls better. But now, I'm just glad I finished! But expect this sort of thing in chapter 12. Just... expect it. Sorry if this was so awkward. Next chapter'll be a sinch once get motivation. But anyway, I have a new poll on my profile, please vote! There, I'm done. R&R!

**P.S.: **OMG, I know all you probably don't wanna know what I've been doing when I was procrastinating but seriously, I have to tell you! I've been playing an AMAZING Visual Nover made by zevia called X-Note. Really, I'm in love with it! Y'all should really play it! I don't care if you buy it or download it, just play! Or if you're not into that stuff or don't want to waste money, iLen-Rin (one of my fav writers) is dubbing it in ! That way, you can listen to the amazing story without the hassle or reading with great voice acting to match! Seriously, just check out the dub AND game! The channel for it is called XNoteDub. Easy right? Don't forget to subscribe XD!


	12. Perpetual

**A/N: **Okay, I wanted to start this as soon as possible though I won't guarantee I'll finish this quickly DX! I just want to get back to those near daily updates I used to do. But that's getting harder since my chappie lengths pretty much doubled. But at least I'm mostly happy with the work I bring out. I think I'll start weekly updates. But from now, I promise that at LEAST one update''ll be up every week! If I finish more than one, GREAT, but at least one! So without further ado, here's the latest. And remember, X-Note! Play or watch the dub. Info is in the previous chapter! And please vote in my poll! I'll stop talking!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Vocaloid. I wish I do sometimes.

Thank you to **_ReturnoftheWings, MaxJacksonCullenGirl, Frozen Sekai, Rina Aria, Campanella, pohkeemawn, Clueless Leaf, Silver Rowdypuff Girl, Tragic Universe, chibis of evil, BloodyBlackRabbit, and Pomegranata _**for reviewing! After the long wait, I'm glad you guys still reviewed XD!

And thank you to my inspiring betas, **_MusicGamer and CluelessLeaf! _**Glad to have you guys!

**Summary: **Memories: They hold the very things we love and the very things we despise. Well, for this girl, Rin Kagamine, her memories are the link, the link that ties everyone and everything, including this story together. First part of the Memories Series! RinxLen

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><p><strong>Chapter 11: Perpetual<strong>

**(Rin's POV)**

Meiko Sakine. The girl who's hair I would braid during our many sleepovers in the past. The girl who was the first to comfort me when I cried. The girl who I could share anything with, knowing she wouldn't chastise me for my faults. But so many things have changed over the past 10 or so years. First of all, we no longer braid each other's hair during sleepovers. That's a give in. She would occasionally yank my hair, but no beautiful ornate braids came out of it. Also, while she was the first to try to calm my restless tears, now she tries her best to invoke them, with varying degrees of success. And lastly, in the past she wouldn't judge me for my faults, but in the present, she would make them blatant, and make sure every ear in the school knows of them. Truly, a lot has changed over the past 10 years. But one thing I'm glad that hasn't is her fiery gaze, a gaze radiating confidence and energy, the gaze meeting with my own at this very moment.

Meiko Sakine, the girl who I considered my best friend, is staring right at me, past the sea of students scurrying in the courtyard, confused and crushed at how I managed to get on the good graces of both Kaito Shion and Luka Megurine.

The attention the two gave was small, from little greetings to strolls between classes, in fear of attracting attention they both know I do not crave. But nonetheless those small gestures did get noticed and managed to attract attention. And with the attention, came the shock: the shock of having the most hated girl in town suddenly have two of the most popular freshmen by her side. Even I was a little surprised when Luka and Kaito found their way to me and the Hatsunes when we arrived at school, bearing wholehearted smiles.

What also surprised the whole of Seicho High was my sudden vibrancy. I was suddenly a ray of bursting confidence and no longer the willing little chew toy I let myself become just weeks ago. There was a notable difference in the smile I showed to the public that managed to rock the student body. What was usually weak, disposed smile full of remorse was suddenly a confident, defiant smirk, that even challenged the ones before me, signaling for them to give the best they have, since I was ready for it.

The judging glances that still came our way were inevitable though Luka and Kaito tried their best to dispel them with their assured glances. Internally, I thought the difficulties the two were having in accommodating me into their lives, lives previously sworn on avoiding me. Because of that, the time we faced in public was hastened and short, yet the two were still there for me, by my side despite the prejudice impaled on me. And for that I'm grateful.

On the other hand, while I was overjoyed by their company, a certain group consisting of Neru Akita, Gakupo Kamui, and Meiko Sakine, were less than pleased. Pointed glares were sent our way, full of disgust from both my company and Luka and Kaito whom they see as betrayers. Luka chose to avoid their glances all together while Kaito chose to meekly smile at them in apology before running to catch up on us. Len, who was either with us or with them, was caught in the middle, playing the role of a distressed messenger forced to relay messages the two groups refused to converse about.

Before long our encounters were cut short by an acquaintance of theirs impolitely intervening, forcing them to stop their idle chit chat and reluctantly leave me and everyone else. But I wasn't alone when they left. I still enjoyed the company of the Hatsune twins and Kei who had recently returned to their own respective homes to my dismay. Our time was otherwise filled with amusing arguments between Kei and Miku or Mikuo and Miku. But other than that, our first day back at school remained uneventful, that is, until the intercom relayed message from Kiyoteru-sensei right before the end of last period.

"Excuse me all teachers and students," His rich voice buzzed through the speaking device. "Please forgive the sudden interruption. As Hanabi Festival's advisor, I'd like to call out this year's Festival Committee to the main office: Neru Akita, Len Kagamine, Luka Megurine, Meiko Sakine, Gakupo Kamui, Kaito Shion, Mikuo Hatsune, Miku Hatsune, Rin Kagamine, and Keiichi Haruki. Thank you, that is all."

Mikuo, who shared the class as me right now, stood up briskly in the seat next to mine while I was planted on my chair not willing to move. Considering what happened last time we all were forced to meet up, you could say I was not very excited for the following meeting. All eyes were on us as Mikuo tried to coax me into standing up. I obliged soon enough and we were in the hall in no time, leaving behind the cold gazes of our peers in the classroom.

We walked silently, our paces matching, not a word spoken between us, much to my surprise. Mikuo just had his head down, examining our feet. I had a feeling that he wasn't going to be the one to talk first. I decided to be the one to break the silence.

"Hey Mikuo," I start talking a peek at him. He looks up at me, question lingering in his eyes.

"Yeah, Rinny?"

I ask worriedly, "Umm, are you sick or something Mikuo?"

Mikuo frowns in confusion before answering, "No, why do you ask?"

"Well, ever since Christmas, you've been less… enthusiastic than usual. So I got worried that maybe you got sick."

He looks at me curiously before asking, "What do you mean, Rinny?"

"Well," I think of examples in my head. "You're quieter than usual." I start. He just looks at me inquisitively. "And you're a lot more serious, you don't joke around as much, and," a blush unwillingly reaches my cheeks as I finish my sentence. "And you don't flirt with me anymore."

Mikuo's pout lingers in his face for a second before being replaced by a smirk. "So you're saying you miss me flirting with you?"

I turn red as I try to stammer, "N-no, tha-that's not it! Not that at all!" I take a deep breath as I continue, "I'm just saying you haven't been acting like yourself as much."

Mikuo chuckled amusedly. "Well, I'll be sure to act like myself again, just so my Rinny can stop worrying about me. I wouldn't that cute face of hers to get wrinkles because of me." He groaned animatedly. "And just to keep her pleased, I'll flirt and flatter her more too." He winks at me. I giggle in response.

"Thanks Mikuo. You're the best."

"And don't you forget it." Before I could notice, Mikuo wrapped his arms behind my back and lifted me easily. He whispers into my ear, "Thanks for worrying about me though."

I giggle at his silliness before taking his gratitude, saying, "You're very welcome, Mikuo." He puts me down and I smile at him while he smiles back.

Before either of us could say anything else, we hear the sound of someone clearing their throat. Mikuo and I look at the direction the noise came from to see Len standing right in front of us in the middle of the hall, his cheeks tainted pink, a suspicious glare pointed at Mikuo. Mikuo glares back in no time. I choose to give a greeting. Smiling, I say, "Hi, Len-kun."

Len looks at me nervously before looking away, answering, "Uh, hi Ri-rin-san."

"What do you want, Kagamine?" Mikuo inquires threateningly. Len puts his glare back on his face. "You ruined a moment between me and Rinny."

"Well, sorry." Len replies sarcastically.

I look at both boys confused. What are the two getting so riled up about? "What moment, Mikuo?"

Len and Mikuo look at me before sighing exasperatedly. Both trade an understanding glance before walking glancing back at me incredulously. "What?" I ask, more confused than ever.

"Nothing, Rinny, it's nothing at all." Mikuo says tiredly.

I stare dumbly at the two who seem to have made a silent truce between them. Giving up on trying to see their reasoning, I just shake my head and I walk away, leaving the two behind me. As Len and Mikuo catch up to me, I find my face twisted in a childish pout. Both boys blush in remorse.

Before long, we arrived at the office where everyone else was already assembled. The scene was… interesting. Like a warzone with two distinct sides. There was Miku, ready to pounce like a tiger, with a look capable of scaring anybody on one side, accompanied by Kei, a cool glare chilling all of them. On the other side was Neru, shining with a flare of superiority that managed to spread to Gakupo and Meiko as well. Luka and Kaito were in the middle not truly choosing a side, not ready to give alliance to one side and fully abandon the other. Our arrival clearly broke the ice, much to the relief of our stressed teacher.

"Sensei?" I ask, just to break the unbearable silence.

"Oh, Kagamine-san! Kagamine-kun and Hatsune-kun too! Thank goodness you're all here!" He breaths out with a tone of relief. He proceeds to stand tall, regaining his lost authority. "Now we can finally start this session." He faces all of us with a stern look on his face. "This matter cannot be postponed any longer. Now, I heard all of your opinions from your personal interviews. Is there any opinions you want to voice vocally? Now is the chance to speak them."

Miku comments first, to my surprise considering she chose to be in this committee as a whim.

"I think the festival should stay traditional. True to its roots. Since you have three out of ten of your members inexperienced with the festival, I think coming up with something new is going to be challenging." She says this with a serious glint in her eyes as she smiles shyly. The smile, to me, seems suspicious and dishonest. Miku admitting her naiveté is out of the ordinary as well. She flashes me that same unusual smile. This causes me to suspect that there's something behind Miku's motives, but I still trust her all the same. So I smile back.

Neru huffs, most likely annoyed at Miku's intervention. To my surprise, I hear her say in an aggravated deadpan, "I agree." I look at her, my face wearing evident shock as she scowls at me. "I agree Hatsune's plans. Keeping the festival traditional will keep the public pleased and is simple enough to do, even with the _insufficient _help we have."

I smile meekly as she says this facing me, not wanting to make my insulted feelings apparent at a time like this. She gets bored of trying to make me crack and turns away, to my relief.

Kiyoteru nods at the girls' comments. "Hatsune-san, Akita-san, you both have good points. But if we go traditional, what will be our theme? We can't possibly reuse one. The Hanabi Festival is a time of reminiscence so naturally, we need to come up with something different to remember this festival by every year."

That's true. The Hanabi Festival was made as a way to remember your past and reflect on it during the present. Every festival being remembered is true as well. I remember all recollections of the festival from my happy days surrounded by love in my childhood to the lonely days of mourning of my recent festival years.

Fragments of my past strike out in my head, trapping me in a daze. Seeing children running around an aging maple tree, having the time of their lives. Laughing ecstatically, watching the lively festival from under a bush. Holding a friend's arm tightly, tight as the promise we were making, tying a knot that would hold our friendship together. Hearing a traumatized yell from a familiar girl, blindly zooming in her direction. Sitting all alone torturing myself with memoirs of the past. Talking with a total stranger, who appeared out of nowhere, just to liven up my spirits. Smiling at a girl in front of me, trying my best to keep that smile on her face. Wiping the tears from two innocent faces, giving them the shoulder to cry on they needed. Feeling my heartbeat hasten as I talk to a boy in front of me, comforted by his warmth. Being carried to sleep by the sounds of fireworks echoing in the background being my lullaby.

Unknowingly, I hear myself whisper, "Memories."

Everyone in the room looks at me, mystified. I inspect all of them in a thoughtful gaze and a lazy smile on my face. I elaborate. "Memories. Our theme. To embrace all the memories of our past and prepare to create new memories for the future."

Kiyoteru-sensei smiles one of his rare smiles. He says simply, "It's perfect." Everyone in the room still stare at me, either a thoughtful stare or a content smile etched on their faces.

Neru suddenly burst upright, jealousy coursing through her. "Well, if that's decided, then we are done here. We no longer need to be in your presence Kagamine." She spits out violently. "Now, if you don't mind, Kiyoteru-sensei, we'll be taking out leave. We'll talk further on tomorrow's meet."

With that, she bursts out of the room, dragging an overwhelmed Len, while an unenthused Gakupo follows her out. Meiko strangely stays behind for a moment deep in thought before standing up plainly and trudging out unemotionally.

We all share a glance before we too say our farewells to Kiyoteru-sensei. He eyes us wearily but still dismisses us. As soon as we get out of the room, Miku says in irritation, "What is up with that Akita?"

Kaito, following behind us, answers unsurely in her defense, "Well, she's not usually like that… It's just that unfortunately she has a grim spot for Rin-san." He smiles apologetically at me.

I believe him. Even though people would think I hate her for all the things I was forced to endure because of her, I don't. I believe that she's a good person. I trusted her to care for everyone else when I wasn't capable. I know she would do anything for them, like I would still do anything for them. I knew they were in good hands, that they would regain their strength in her presence. And while she taught them to hate me in the process, looking at the five of them, I know that they did regain some of that strength.

I also know that right now, I'm hurting Neru as well. I know I'm forcing her to endure the same pain I faced in the past. I know she feels that I'm taking the friends she made away, making them turn against her like she did to them with me. And in a way, I am taking them away from her. A hate for me was what bonded them in the first place. As of now, I'm taking away that bond. I'm taking away that hate. But looking at her right now, seemingly waiting for our arrival, I know she's not going to let me get away with it without a fight.

There I see her, her legs spread pompously, chest held high, looking like the epitome of pride. An arrogant glare I'm so familiar with adorns her face, which under close inspection, looks very out of place. Len, Meiko, and Gakupo are behind her, Len looking embarrassed, Gakupo smug, and Meiko still appears detached.

"Shion-kun, Megurine-san. We've had enough. Answer me right now. Why exactly are you with that loser Kagamine?" She interrogates harshly, hate lining her words.

Kaito bravely takes the liberty of answering. "Because we promised to stay by her side. Because we're _friends_." I smile at his confidence. Looks like I have an influence as well.

Neru's gaze only hardens at his answer. Her scowl totally cold and unwelcome, she comments, "Well, you can't be friends with her and expect me to stay with you. Choose. Her or us."

Luka and Kaito's jaws drop. They look genuinely torn. Neru certainly wants to win this battle. I smile at them understandingly. My smile tries to speak, _I'll still love you either way. _And it's true. In a situation like this, which would you choose? To be with most of your friends you've stuck with since childhood and rule the school together, being loved by everyone, or be with a girl who betrayed you and her friends of outcasts, subjected to torture every day. The choice is obvious. Neru won this battle. But still, I refuse to go down in vain, to let every word we've spoken to be wasted. Because I meant every single sentence I uttered in our time together. So now, the best I could do is to smile at them, letting them know that yes, I'll still love both of them either way.

Just before I start to walk away, Gakupo speaks up. Directly facing the stocked Luka, he questions commandingly, "Well, Lu? You're coming with us, right?"

This triggers something in Luka. She meets his glance for a second before dropping it and putting a passive grin on her face. She suddenly grips my hand tightly, shrugging Gakupo off discreetly, and, to my surprise, faces me, the vulnerability she is trying to suppress apparent.

"Hey, Rin-chan, it's getting awfully _cold_ here, don't you think?" She glances at me, worry lingering in her eyes. "Why don't we just _leave_?" And with that, Luka pulled me forward; walking away from Neru and the group, not even batting a lash at their direction. The rest just followed.

On the way out, I heard Kaito whisper, "Her it is."

All the while, my shock was plastered on my face, to the amusement of the rest of them. I looked at Kaito and Luka, who gave me reassuring glances, and then at the twins who seemed pleased of the outcome. I look over at Kei's intense glance last, and words he said to me not too long ago ring in my head. _Trust them. _A smile reaches my features as once again, I feel foolish for thinking that Luka and Kaito would run for me. And even though I'm certain that behind me, Neru is wearing a look of defeat, a look of pain after losing her friends in a choice she forced them to make, I can't help but grin happily. Because they chose me.

"Wait!" A desperate voice screams behind us, forcing us all to stop on our heels. "Kaito-kun! Luka-chan!" The voice yells out. I turn around immediately at the sound of the voice and see Meiko Sakine running frantically towards us, confusion and turmoil etched all over her face.

She pleads, desperation taking her body, causing her face to contort and her body to quiver. "A-are you guys serious with this?"

Kaito just looks at her confidently, a thoughtful smile lining his face. "Dead serious." Luka gives her a sure smile before walking off, once again taking me with her. Even though we are walking forward, I take a look back at Meiko.

What I see before me is the outline of a girl shaking her head in disbelief, looking anguished and lost, glaring at me with a look I can only describe as pure hate. Hate on me for stealing her closest friends. Hate on her closest friends for siding with me. And hate on herself for showing the smallest trace of longing on her face.

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><p>To say the following morning was unpleasant for Luka and Kaito is an understatement. The two were not used to being avoided like the plague so the sudden feeling of insecurity reached both surely. But nevertheless, the two handled it maturely, accepting the consequences of their choice and with it the feeling of being ostracized. Really, I knew the two were hurting inside as they lacked my experience and willingness, Kei's cool apathy, and the twins' unbreakable willpower, but were staying strong for my sake. But still, they had the four of us to keep them company and that was enough to bear through the day.<p>

Neru, Gakupo, Meiko, and Len avoided confrontation today, avoiding us as much as we avoided them. Though it remained a mystery as to why they didn't confront with us today to most, as they would most likely retrieve everyone's support, it was no mystery to me. They were hurt, betrayed, and humiliated in losing two friends they've known for their whole lives. I know the feeling.

But soon enough, the rest of the day dwindled and I soon found myself walking to the main office once again, preparing myself for the now-daily meetings we would hold to prepare for the festival. Just great.

I arrived early this time, no one occupying the room except for Len and Kiyoteru-sensei. I giggle shyly and greet, "H-hello sensei. Kagamine-kun."

"Afternoon Kagamine-san." Kiyoteru looks up from his papers and greets me.

Len looks at me slightly pink and stutters, "U-umm, h-hi."

I find an empty seat and sit down nervously, shifting my gaze from the floor, to my feet, to Len who does the same. On the times our gazes coincidentally meet, we both immediately turn away embarrassedly and try to occupy ourselves by twiddling our thumbs to playing with our clothes. Judging by his reactions, he's nervous too. Though despite his nerves, I hear Len calling out to me.

"H-hey, Kagamine-san?" He questions quietly.

"Yeah?" I meekly reply.

"U-um, well, uh, just, I'm sorry, 'kay?" He stammers in a hushed tone.

I'm confused by his words once again. "Why are you sorry? You haven't done anything wrong." I ask him directly. Before he can answer, Gakupo enters the room thus cutting all conversations between me and Len. Soon enough though, everyone else paced into the room solemnly, adding to the already tension-packed room. As soon as everyone arrived and was situated, Kiyoteru-sensei commenced talking.

"Because of the… dull atmosphere in here," Kiyoteru-sensei began, obviously referring to the thick tension between the council participants, "I want to cease discussion for a while. So today, I want to start the actual preparations."

"So what are we going to do, sensei?" Mikuo asks, curious.

"Well, first of all, I'm going to separate you into three groups. One group will accompany me to the school's storage room and unpack equipment; another group will go to the general store and pick up ordered goods, and the last group will scout the town for suitable locations for events. Only when we have a base prepared do we build upon it with our theme and ideas." Kiyoteru-sensei sums up.

"Now as for groups, Akita-san, Kamui-kun, Kagamine-kun, you'll stay with me. Megurine-san, Hatsune-kun, Haruki-kun, Shion-kun, you'll be going to the general store to pick up goods, and that leaves Hatsune-san, Kagamine-san, and Sakine-san for scouting."

We were ushered quickly into our groups and were sent out to do our jobs. As I walk between Miku and Meiko, I think of how the day will play out. I look at Miku, looking at the map we were given, and automatically feel assured despite the clueless look on her face regarding the town map. But changing my gaze to Meiko, I can't help but imagining her state yesterday on our way out. Right at that moment, she was so vulnerable, so dependent, and so… unlike the Meiko I knew. So right now, instead of being wary of her like I should have been, I'm instead more worried.

We keep on walking, no one saying a single word as Miku was too focused on the map to comment and Meiko and I too tense to say anything. Very soon, I find myself staring at sites unfamiliar to me and get a feeling of worry in the pit of my stomach. I skeptically ask Miku, "Umm, Miku? Are you sure you know where we're going?"

Miku laughs nervously, not a good sign, and responds, "Uh-huh, Rinny… There's this spot I wanna… uhh, get to." I just worriedly nod in response.

We keep on walking, getting more and more tired, the sites still looking unfamiliar to me, We watched the sun droop lower and lower signifying the time passed and just as it reaches the horizon, Miku finally lets out an aggravated yell.

"Ugh! I don't understand this map at all! What are those weird symbols supposed to mean?"

"Wait," Meiko breaths out annoyed. "Are you saying we're lost?"

"NO!" Miku says insulted. She falters a bit under our gazes. "I'm just saying, I don't know where we are."

"Miku!" I yell accusingly.

"Great, just great!" Meiko remarks sarcastically. "I knew it was a bad idea to let this bimbo lead us."

Miku flares up a bit. "Excuse me? I'm not a bimbo! I just have no idea about a thing in this fucking town!" She remarks defensively.

I get in front of Miku, who's getting ready to snap. "Guys, calm down. We don't need to worry! We'll just keep on walking! We got to get back, somehow!"

Miku practically goes a full 180. She swoons, "That's my Rinny, always so optimistic." I just nod unsurely and lead the way. Meiko shakes her head exasperatedly and follows my lead. Personally, I have no idea where I'm going. All I see are endless trees. But still, I have to think positively.

Time flies by. We start to see the orange sun dip its face into the horizon. It's getting late and I'm sure the others are worried about us. I look at the map we were provided but don't recognize a thing in it. Just before I admit the fact that we're hopeless, I look up from the map. The ground beneath us is hilly and the grass untamed. The cement road customary to the town vanishes into a modest dirt path. The path leads uphill, onto a single steep hill. The trees from before have subsided, and all we see in front of us is a single maple tree. I never thought the past would come back to me this way.

Meiko gasps in recognition. "Ri-Kagamine-san…" Meiko whispers. "This place… do you remember?"

How could I possibly forget? This place, which has so much meaning to my life. This is the very tree showcased on the picture I ponder about day after day. This is the very tree that I unconsciously escaped to that day when Kei found me. This is the tree where all of us used to play on, every year during the festival. This is the very tree where I made a promise to a girl who I considered to be my best friend. The girl next to me at this moment. How could I possibly forget?

But despite the obvious recognition I have of to this place, I don't show it. Mainly because of the said girl next to me. So many things changed between us, but this tree has always remained the same. And because of that, all it'll do is bring up unfortunate memories. So I choose to deny my recollection for her sake. "Nope, why do you ask?" I say in a steely voice.

Meiko looks genuinely disappointed. "N-nothing." She continues dejectedly. I fear that the memories still come to her. "W-well, I know where to go from here. I'll take the lead then." With that, Meiko takes the lead, not looking back. I don't do the same. Instead, I give the tree a nice long stare, thoughts spreading through me like wildfire. Then realize a statement. _I'll have to get over this tree too._

* * *

><p>I lay in my bed considering all of these thoughts. It's already nighttime but I can't sleep with thoughts tangled all over my head. We arrived back to school in no time under Meiko's leadership, meeting up with a distressed party who were overjoyed to see us again. After clearing up that we were fine with Sensei, we were quickly dismissed. And after the walk home I spent with the Hatsune twins, I've been in bed thinking. Thinking like I am now. Thinking about the past. The festival. The recent phone call I received.<p>

A little after I got home and after supper with Teto, I received I phone call from a very worried Kaito Shion. In this phone call, he revealed a vital piece of information that caused my head to be in the uproar it is now. Apparently, his neighbor, Meiko Sakine, never came home. Worry surged through the phone as he asked if I knew of her whereabouts. I gave the obvious answer. Disappointed he hung up, ready to ask everyone else. And that's how I ended up worriedly laying back in my bed, thinking. Thinking about Meiko Sakine. My relations with her. Why I'm so worried. My confidence. The recent events. Her whereabouts. And suddenly. I bolt up, my head clear and an objective in mind: to retrieve Meiko Sakine.

I find myself walking through the night, having a location as a target, a mission to do. Shivering under the January gale, I quicken my pace. When I get to the area in mind, I automatically look up. Leaning on the trunk of the maple tree is of course, Meiko Sakine.

I take a seat next to her, back to the very place that started everything.

"You're a liar." She says plainly, not bothering to even look at me, instead gazing at the night sky decorated by stars. "You remember."

"Of course," I reply somewhat bitterly. "How could I forget?"

"Everything is changing around us. It's pretty easy to forget nowadays." She responds in a pained deadpan.

"Well, not everything changed." I retort.

She shakes her head harshly. "Oh really? Maybe for you. For me, everything's changing."

"Like what?" I ask, testing her.

"For one, Kaito-kun and Luka-chan left me. And I have no idea who to trust anymore. And I feel like a total monster." She says remorsefully.

"Anything else?" I press in an effort to relieve her.

"Yeah," She says, finally taking a peak at me. "You're not with us anymore." She smiles painfully.

"Hmm..." The two of us sit in silence for a while. I take this time to inspect Meiko. She's staring at the dark sky her eyes clouded, so lost and unsure, not bearing the fire the usually belies in them. She's leaning against the tree stiffly, almost as if she fears to let go of it. There hair is tousled by the wind, reaching her face but she doesn't bother fixing them. She doesn't bother fixing anything. In all, she looks like she's given up hope, succumbed to the past and not planning on getting out.

She says in a hoarse voice, betraying the weakness she's trying to hide, "I've never been good of letting go of the past, you should know."

I know exactly what she's talking about. Instances during our childhood pop into my mind. Meiko never seemed to let things go. She would hold grudges until they became to heavy of a burden. I nod as my reply.

"Now, shoot," she says suddenly, feeling my gaze on her.

Puzzled, I ask, "What?"

She answers in no time. "You said some things haven't changed. Name one thing." She challenges.

I search through my brain for something to say. Anything. "This tree." I exemplify. She raises her eyebrows at me so I elaborate. "Even after all that's happened, this tree's still here."

I expected her to cheer up at my comment but she did no such thing. Instead, she just remained the same, not showing even an ounce of emotion.

"That's a good one." She comments dejectedly.

Looking at her now, so detached, so emotionless, so cold. This isn't the Meiko I knew. That Meiko was involved, exuberant, fiery. I can't help but wonder what happened to her, what caused her to break and succumb into her own fears.

In another effort to cheer her up, I keep going. "You know what else is still the same, _Meimei_?" She flinches at the sound of my childhood nickname of her. "Our promise. Do you remember _that_?" The promise. A promise we made in front of this maple tree minutes before the Hanabi Festival. She can't have forgotten.

She replies mokingly using my own words. "_How could I forget?"_

I sigh. "Well, that hasn't changed." It's true. The fact that the two of us are here together; it's proof that our promise has remained unbroken

"I beg to differ." She interrupts. "I broke our promise." Even though she tries to say it nonchalantly, I can still feel the regret in her voice.

I stand up, no longer able to deal with her pessimism. I yell harshly, "Do you hate me Meimei?"

"What kind of question is that?" She asks shocked, a little hesitant.

"Just answer!" I reply.

She stares at me blankly before she looks away weakly, not strong enough to match my intense glance. She hugs her knees pitifully, as she speaks, avoiding my question. "_To embrace all the memories of our past and prepare to create new memories for the future_." She repeats my words from the meeting. She takes a chance and looks at me, my gaze softening. "I can't do that Rin. I can't look back into the past and be happy. It hurts too much. After you left, I couldn't function at all. I was so helpless, so dependent, so hurt. And I thought I hated you for making me that." She looks up at me remorsefully, not bitterly. "So I hurt you to get over you hurting me. That didn't work at all. I didn't get over a thing." She chuckles humorlessly. "And now I drove Kaito and Luka away, too. I've been too caught up in myself that I didn't even care to see if they're hurting too." She finishes sadly.

The vulnerability she's been suppressing for years makes itself obviously evident on her face. Large droopy tears slowly fall from her face. To her bitter remorse, I don't wipe them. Not until I get an answer. "And you know what's the worst of it all?" She asks me, smiling desperately. "That I was wrong. That I still couldn't hate you after everything. That everything was just a waste."

I continue to inspect her for a while longer. Her kneeling below me, as if admitting I'm above her; it just seems so out of place. _But, _I think, _the two of us have been out if place for years._

"Well," I continue kneeling to get to her level, satisfied in finally getting an answer. "I don't hate you either." I brush her bangs off her face and clear the tears from her face. I greet her with a warm smile. "I can never." Her shock is priceless. "And I know for sure that Kaito-kun and Luka-chan don't hate you either.

She flails erratically as I finish, though I hold in her in place. She wails at me, "How could you say that? After everything I've done to you, how could you say something like that?"

I giggle which causes her to stop and look at me overwhelmed. "Because we promised, silly!" I answer simply, naively. "And that means neither of us broke our promises. So don't worry." She looks at me in shock for a while longer before laughing at my silly smile.

"I guess you're right." She says smiling despite the tears.

I stand again, the cold finally getting to me. I bring my hand down to her and offer it. "Now why don't we get out of here? We have a lot of catching up to do, Meimei." I say casually.

She takes my hand and says softly, "Sure, Rinrin." I giggle at the name.

Looking at our intertwined hands, I'm reminded of how much has changed between Meiko Sakine and me. But looking back, I now see a lot of things that remained the same, that have stayed perpetual. One being our friendship, a bond while weathered, could still be rebuilt. Two being our promise, an eternal oath that neither of us plan to break. And the last being our memories, the very thing that ties us together.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Now, I know I suck again. TWO WEEKS, TSUNDEREME, TWO WEEKS! DX! I promised to update sooner though I ended up not updating at all again. Well, please, please forgive me! Now, I promise to have one update a week or else! Every Saturday, expect an update!Really, if I don't have an update up in a week's time, don't hesitate to remind me! PM me, Spam me, it'll work! I'll update! So please, please forgive me! Well, this update is my longest ever if that counts for anything. Now, actually, I had this chapter done a week ago but I wasn't pleased with the outcome. And since I promised ever since _Abandonment _that I would never publish anything I wasn't proud of, I didn't publish it. So I reimagined the whole thing with a lot more detail. I personally like this a lot better! I could show the original for you to compare but… Oh well. The original was a lot more rushed and had less complications. Still, I felt the ending was a bit awkward and rushed but I was fine leaving it like that! Tell me if you like it, or dislike it! Please, please, to get me motivated, R&R!

**P.S: **By the way, guys, I have a bunch of stories in planning. Really, if you like any of the ideas, PM me! They're all shown on my profile and I'd really love to hear who's interested! Personally, my C_inderella School _is probably the first sub-project I'll work on between my main series, since right now, it's my fav! It'll be a cute little harem that's very visual novel-esque, based out of Gumi's song with the same name! Links are in my profile. I'll probably also do a fic based out of otome games too so... yeah! Again, if you want to see a project see the light of day, PM me! If you have any ideas or suggestions, again, PM me since I will consider it! So, yeah! Toootles~!


	13. Hidden

**A/N: **Hi there! Now, I promised I'd get at least an update early in so here you all go! Yay! Well, for all you RinLen shippers out there that came here for the romance, well, the next few chapters are going to be a treat! A very big treat! And I'm working all I have to channel my inner fangirl since I'm somewhat mad at my Lenny. But that won't stop him from being the moeblob he'll be ;D! As for now, I'm really channeling my GakuLuka shipping powers to get this update in faster without the aid of my coffee... I hope it works! I'm listening to 'Go Google It' as I type. But hey, you at least know what this chapter will be about!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Vocaloid. I'm just another obsessed fan that happens to enjoy writing about them.

Thank you to **_Campanella, FrozenSekai, chibis of evil, EX33, pofkeemawn, CluelessLeaf, ReturnOfTheWings, Rina Aria, BloodyBlackRabbit, Tragic Universe, Silent Affair, and a nameless reviewer _**for reviewing! Thank you to all my longtime readers that have been there from the start and for the new ones just reading! I'm fans of you all!

And thank you to my jaw dropping betas: **_MusicGamer and CluelessLeaf! _**Glad to have you guys!

**Summary: **Memories: They hold the very things we love and the very things we despise. Well, for this girl, Rin Kagamine, her memories are the link, the link that ties everyone and everything, including this story together. First part of the Memories Series! RinxLen

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 12: Hidden<strong>

**(Rin's POV)**

Gakupo Kamui. Forever his carefree smirk and his gung-ho attitude has remained a mystery to most. Not many people knew what exactly was behind it, what lied in the depths of Gakupo Kamui's heart. Only his closest friends could see through his unbelievable masquerade and realize his feelings. There they saw his need to please people, to always be able to fit into people's standards. They saw the truly hard-working boy that was hiding behind the infamous laidback 'Kamui-sama' the whole school idolized. But as of late, even his closest friends could no longer penetrate the guard that is his mask. Recently, no one is able to relate to him, read him in any way, hear his motives, or see the hard-working boy they knew. No one can find the real him hidden by the burden he brought himself. And through that burden, he's hurting the ones I know he still holds dear.

Gakupo Kamui, the boy who broke one of my best friend's heart, is staring longingly at said girl with the name of Luka Megurine, remorse lining his face.

Everything he is doing confusing me beyond belief. His actions, his words, the thoughts that cross his face; they seem so simple, so obvious but they don't make any sense at all. From what little I can read of him, I _know _deep inside my heart that he still loves her. All those years together and the pure longing I see on his face couldn't be a lie. I believe in him more than that.

But if he truly feels sorry, so desperate to get her back, why not confront her? Just apologize. It's easy to see that despite the act she conjures up, Luka is longing as well. She's relied on Gakupo her whole life and has always trusted him to be there. Now that he's gone, she's completely lost. But even though that's true, she can't be the one to take the initiative as not only does she have the enraged Meiko and Miku stopping her, I know Luka wants to grow out of her dependency and make standards herself. If she goes back to him, she'll be admitting that she is still that girl easily manipulated by him. But it's clear she isn't. That's why she _can't_ confront him but for all I see, he has no reason for not confronting her, other than a loss of pride and well, me.

At times like these, staring at the ones who were and are important to my life here in the courtyard early in the morning, I can't help but think that in my efforts to soothe them individually, I'm driving a wedge between our once unbreakable friendships. I am taking them away from lives so lofty and comfortable that I feel guilty to have them in my presence at times. At times like these, I repeat the words Kei told me about a month ago when I met him. _Trust them. Trust them. Trust them. _More or less, that is my remedy for my doubts, coupled with the reassurance and encouragement from the very friends I feel too blessed to have. Friends who I'll sacrifice anything for.

"Hello, Rin-chan?" I hear someone call out though I'm too absorbed in my thoughts to notice.

"Hey, Rinrin!" Another voice yells out louder.

"Oh, is my darling Rinny spacing out again?" The last voice questions dreamily.

"I'm not!" I reply, fully back to consciousness. I notice Miku, Luka, and Meiko towering above me, smirking entertained. I notice the absence of the boys. "Hey, where are Kaito-kun, Kei-kun, and Mikuo?" I ask completely unaware.

"Oh, the boys?" Meiko repeats. "That's actually why we came and found you! We don't have to go to the festival meeting today."

"Yes," Luka continues, "you see, Kiyoteru-sensei called the boys over to help lift the heavy objects from the storage room for the festival. They're excused for the whole day and our attendance wouldn't be necessary for today."

"Those lucky bastards," Miku mumbles. "Well," She perks up immediately, "at least we don't have to deal with them all day! And that Akita too. That's a relief."

I chuckle at Miku. "Aww… come on. I'm gonna miss them."

Miku scoffs. "Even my idiotic twin?"

I grin in response. "Yes, Miku, even Mikuo. I'll really miss him, even just for a day."

"Hmmmm…" Miku eyes me devilishly. She trades smirks with Meiko and Luka behind her. "I got a question. Who'll you miss more, my moronic brother, or dear shota-kun?"

I put on a confused face. Now why would she ask that? Unknowingly, I find a blush creeping its way towards my face. "Why do you ask?" I ask dumbly.

"Just wondering," Miku replies, avoiding my question.

"I'll miss both of them equally!" I say cheerily. Meiko sighs, not pleased with my answer while Luka and Miku smile at me knowingly. I am still utterly confused.

"Well, how about we go in now?" Luka interjects.

I agree and Miku and Meiko follow, close to our backs. Soon though, I feel Luka briskly stop in her tracks, causing me to halt as well. I peek at her and see she is staring at something, no someone, very passively. I look in her direction. Of course, I see him. Gakupo Kamui.

Before he can get a word out and before Miku can intervene, Luka walks away coldly, pretending to not notice him.

Gakupo, startled by her actions, calls out, "H-hey! Lu-cha-"

Luka again stops abruptly. Only turning her head back, she murmurs, "Megurine-san."

Gakupo, confused, catches up with us and lets out a lost, "Huh?"

Luka proceeds. "Megurine-san. My given name. That's the only name strangers who refuse to acknowledge me should be using." With that, Luka walks away coldly, making me feel awed.

I stand shocked to the spot. The realization hits me suddenly, coming at me at full force. The realization that a single apology, a single discussion, won't be able to solve the problem. Since this isn't the problem Luka's setting out to fix. The words she mumbled the day we reconciled replayed in my head. _Thank you Rin-chan. I-I'm too weak to be alone. _

Only now do I realize Luka's true efforts. Her efforts to get stronger, to change for the better, to grow. And to do that, she thinks she would need to shed Gakupo from her life and all her feelings for him. He is the epitome of her past after all. A past where she would cower when trapped in solitude and practically beg to keep those around her from leaving. But now, she wants that past to no longer define her, walking away from her dependency with the cool diligence she holds now, and prove to me, him, and most importantly, herself that she's different. And she's demanding change from Gakupo too if he ever wants to maintain a friendly relation with her, even if it hurts her in the process.

Finally coming to this realization, I turn back to Gakupo, bargaining him to comply, and stop his stupid little mind games to keep either of them from hurting. I meet his gaze and try to explain it all with just that, a single expression, to convey the worry, the desperation, the disdain I feel. I beg him to comply, to drop his façade and express what he really feels if he truly cares for Luka.

But for some reason, as soon as he saw my meaningful stare, he just held it for a second before smiling, shaking his head, and turning away. From the view of any spectator, it appeared as if he just shrugged me off and left, not getting my message at all. But I wasn't just a spectator. I was there with him, the true him, even in that small moment. And in that moment, for some reason, I knew he received my message. He understood everything I tried to explain to him about Luka; maybe even knew before I did.

But despite knowing that, he still won't comply? But what reason, if any, would stop him from doing so? And if he did have a reason, why keep it hidden? Staring at his retreating frame, I ponder that once again, Gakupo Kamui is confusing me beyond belief.

* * *

><p>"What is up with that Gakupo?" Meiko Sakine voices, expressing both her thoughts and my thoughts perfectly.<p>

Meiko, just like Luka and Kaito, spends her school time with me, choosing me over popularity or acceptance. She had no problem with being ostracized since she didn't particularly care what people thought of her. Actually, she thought of the popularity as a burden.

"I don't know…" I let out the only answer I knew.

As of this moment, I 'm walking to my next class with Meiko, who shares that very class, after separating from Luka and Miku who both have different classes from us.

I take a look at Meiko who is speeding a little ahead of me, seemingly annoyed of her own thoughts.

"It's just that he and Luka have been together since, like, forever!" Meiko states. "And now all he's doing is treating her like trash; it just doesn't make sense."

I informed Meiko of Luka's predicament. Apparently, Gakupo failed to explain it to any of them. The topic was mentioned during my efforts to convince her neither Kaito nor Luka hated her that night I found her on the maple tree. We actually spent most of the night together, just talking, catching up like we promised. Looking at the two of us now, it seemed like the rift between us never happened. But back to the topic at hand, Meiko's reaction wasn't very pleasant either. Profanity, words of pity, and the occasional death threat could be heard, very loudly at that. She was just as shocked as I was at how it was possible for such a relationship to deteriorate. Well, actually, that isn't much considering the two of us experienced the falling of an important friendship as well.

But more topics were shared during that very lengthy walk home. They varied from the serious like when Meiko doubted my acceptance, and my efforts to reassure her, to the humorous like when discussing Kaito's worry for her, causing Meiko to rant on his idiotic and overreacting behavior. The whole of the talk was nostalgic, similar to those we used to share when we were kids, and especially helpful in the rebuilding of our once strong bond.

"Maybe he has a reason." I try to defend in Gakupo's favor, tired of recalling the exhausting night before. For some reason, I believe he does have a reason, a reason for abandoning Luka and treating her coldly all this time. It doesn't really change my view on him, but it helps thinking that he's doing this for a reason, not just because he no longer cares for Luka.

"You think?" Meiko asks inquisitively, not sure herself. "You don't think he's just, you know, letting her go."

"I don't know," I find myself repeating. "But I just like to believe in him."

Meiko chuckles. "You really are that optimistic." She smiles at me amused. "Just like Miku says. Or more like swoons." I giggle in response.

Ever since this morning, it seemed like Meiko and Miku clicked automatically. After the brief tension of the 'bimbo' incident the day before, the two just bonded naturally. Maybe it was their similar mischievous personalities, their mutual fondness of me, or their sadistic behavior towards men, but something brought the two together, and let them relate almost instantly.

Meiko's treatment towards Mikuo is also uncannily similar to Miku's. The moment Mikuo commented on how… uhm, _cute_ my uniform was today, he not only had his sister on his back like usual, he had another one of my friends pounding on him, much to his fright. I guess he was expecting Meiko to be similar to Luka and Kaito who would just laugh shyly whenever he flatters me. Unfortunately for him, he couldn't be more wrong.

Kei on the other hand, gained Meiko's respect. In all, Luka, Kaito, and Meiko got along with Kei as he wasn't as… eccentric as the Hatsunes. Luka easily related to Kei's witty temperament. Kaito easily befriended him, and Meiko admired his patience when dealing with the 'teal haired idiots'. In all, our group dynamic was pleasant. More diverse than it used to but I admit we serve as great foils to each other.

Before I could delve into my thoughts further, the cold sensation of frigid water coming upon me bolted me upright, stopping me. I look up and see Meiko already a distance ahead of me, probably not noticing my spacing out. Right in front of me though, is a second year boy I've grown used to as he's one of my most frequent tormentors. Before I shrink back in fear like I used to, I remind myself of the changes I promised to myself. I stand up tall, which isn't much comparing my small frame with his tall stature, and try my best to look at him square in the eye.

"S-sempai*," I try to acknowledge as confidently as I can but find myself quivering involuntarily.

"Long time no see, Kagamine," He taunts mockingly. "I've heard you've gotten very obnoxious lately. Someone's been a naughty girl!" He spits, causing others around us to snicker. I try my best not to scowl at how disgusting this guy is. I've got to be respectful if I want to get out of this without disrespecting a senior. I smile, ignoring the fact he is disgracing me.

"Oh, where did you hear that, sempai?" I say a little more rigidly. He looks at me sharply. I shiver either from the chill of my wet clothes has on my body or the severity of his eyes.

"Lookie here, my little, ugly kohai. You don't act dumb with me. I don't know how you've managed to trick the most popular freshmen in the school but it was a mistake to let them out of your sight. Now you're all alone again, without any of them or those outcasts you hang out with to help you. " He breathes out viciously, getting suspiciously closer to me. I back away by instinct. Soon though, I find my back pressed tightly against the wall. He's right; I'm trapped. The words sting though I have a feeling more is to come unless I do something. I clamp my eyes tight in preparation. I hear snickers in the background. The breathing of my disgusting senior too close for comfort. The sound of materials falling. I prepare myself for his touch; make sure I don't flinch or do anything to urge him further. To my surprise I feel nothing.

I open my eyes to see what's going on. Just as I was expecting to see my senior's face in front of me, waiting for my eyes to open just to relish in the moment, to my relief, I see him turned the other direction. In front of him, I see Len Kagamine.

"Hey Len-kun!" The senior greets smugly all of a sudden. "Would you care to harass this little whore with me?"

Len looks at me for a second. Looking into his eyes for the first time, he looks clearly enraged. There's an anger surging through his eyes so unfamiliar to the Len I know. Though despite that he tries to maintain his façade and tries to engage in idle chit-chat.

"Uhm, no thanks Taro-sempai…" Len says hesitantly, referring to most likely the senior. He glances back at me, just standing there defenselessly before continuing. He looks back at Taro. "Actually, I came because I need your help. The Committee is short on hands. You mind helping?"

"Aww… fine, I'll help but what about this thing over there?" He questions rudely, gesturing to me.

Len surveys me once again, this time concealing his worried face with a look of apathy. "Just leave her. She doesn't deserve to be acknowledged." He responds.

Taro smirks grossly at me. "You're right." He nods as he turns away. Good riddance."Let's go." With that, all the students in the hall lose interest and move away, leaving me alone with Len. I look at him nervously. He looks back for a while before walking off. Just as I thought he was going to leave, he turns back suddenly and mouths a single phrase. _I'm sorry._

I stand there alone for a while, soaked to the bone just processing what just happened. It was a short while later when Meiko found me and prompted me to change clothes when seeing my wet exterior. It was even later when I chose to explain what happened to her, Miku, and Luka where I had to stop Miku and Meiko from going after the guy in a fit of revenge. But it was a long while later when my head finally saw daylight in the situation. When I realized that Len was the one who saved me. That he drove away the senior for my sake. That he apologized afterwards. That maybe he's starting to care for me too. That I didn't get to mutter a word of thanks in response.

* * *

><p>"Len-kun!" I yell out in an effort to find the blond haired boy. "Len-kun!"<p>

School's finished and as of this moment, I'm roaming around the school grounds for any site of Len Kagamine. Ever since I realized I haven't given my proper thanks to him, the thought never left my mind. So now I'm searching the entire school for him just so I could give my words of gratitude, not giving up until I do.

_Where could he be?_ I ask myself. I know the boys were dismissed after a supposed long day of work according to Mikuo but I also learned from Kaito that Len and a few other boys he gathered stayed behind to help Kiyoteru-sensei. So that brought me to my mission of single-handedly find Len in the school, since I wouldn't want to burden any one of them for something as silly as a thank you.

I finally head to the main office, considering asking Kiyoteru-sensei about it instead of feebly looking around the school with no clue. I enter the office and see a very flustered Kiyoteru-sensei surrounded by heavy looking boxes with a very specific label: Hanabi Festival. This must be what the boys have been working on all day. But looking at the focused face on my sensei's face, looks like the work's still unfinished.

I clear my voice in order to achieve his attention. He looks up, seeing me through his crooked glasses, and acknowledges me with a smile.

"Kagamine-san. What can I do for you?" He says very politely.

"Uhm…" I find it hard to voice my request of finding Len to Sensei realizing how awkward it would sound of I just asked frankly. It would sound like I like him or something! That's just silly! So to save myself from the embarrassment, I try my best to whip up an excuse on the dot. "Well, Sensei… You see, I'm looking for Kagamine-kun." He raises his eyebrow as if pressing me to go on. I gulp realizing how red I must be. "I-I need to discuss a school project with h-him." I stutter. That's a good enough excuse for now. I just hope he doesn't pry.

He smiles entertained. "May I ask what project?" I tense at his question as cold sweat drips down my body. Seeing my reaction, Kiyoteru-sensei chuckles. "I thought as much." So he saw through my lie. He smiles at me genuinely when I expected him to frown and scold me for lying. "You don't need to worry Kagamine-san. I won't tell anyone." I blush beet red at his implication. I let him continue without commenting. "But I have to say I can't help you this time. Kagamine-kun left quite a while ago."

I sag hearing that unfortunate piece of news. Looks like I'll just have to talk to Len tomorrow. I smile at Sensei despite the failure. "Thank you for your help Sensei!" I bow in respect.

"It's no problem Kagamine-san." He responds getting back to work. Seeing the big piles and boxes just lying there, I can't help but feel the need to help out. This is _our_ festival after all. And after learning Len's gone, my purpose for being here is void. Sensei looks up once again. "Yes?"

"Uhm…" I find myself mumbling once again. "Do you need any assistance Sensei?" I offer.

He smiles broadly at me. "Yes, desperately," he jokes.

I giggle. "So what can I do?" I ask cheerily.

Sensei sighs tiredly. "Well, I can handle most of these materials myself. So how about you move these boxes back into the storage room. They weren't needed." I nod and response and bend down to gather the pile. It's a fairly medium sized pile but nonetheless, with my small frame, I knew to expect trouble. But knowing this, I didn't complain, not wanting to let Sensei down. I bend down and use all my strength. My vision is blocked by the boxes and the weight slows my movements drastically but I think I can manage to get to the storage since no student line the hall at this time.

Very soon though, on my way to the storage room, I find myself losing my balance. Maybe it was because I was naturally uncoordinated or the weight of the boxes before me but very soon, I feel my weight to shift and my toes leave the ground. Just as I started to brace myself for a fall, getting ready to drop the packages to shield my face, I feel two hands support my back, helping me stand upright. Surprisingly, the majority of boxes get lifted from behind me, leaving me with just a manageable amount. I look behind me and see that Gakupo Kamui is carrying the boxes I was about to drop, meaning he was the one who saved me from an unfortunate fall.

He smirks at me leisurely. "Having trouble Rin-chan?" He asks humorously.

I gape out of shock for a short moment. I'm aware it was impolite and that it raised one of Gakupo's eyebrows but the familiarity he talked with around me; it was surprising. Really, I'd thought he's be as hostile as Neru when talking to me directly. I guess I was wrong about him again.

"U-uhh… yeah. Thanks for the help." I try to recover.

"No prob." He assures. "Now, where are you taking these? I'll do it for you." He bargains.

"Oh, no!" I refuse. "I'm capable of doing this myself!" I protest.

He smirks further. "I don't think Little Rin-chan is..." He teases mockingly.

I huff and walk away taking just the boxes left in my hold. "Then we'll bring them together," I compromise. This encounter may be my chance get to be enlightened in the ways of Gakupo Kamui. Might as well take advantage of it.

"Sure," he agrees, meeting my pace. We tread in silence, the only sounds being the pounding of our feet and the rattle of the boxes' contents. Soon though, Gakupo breaks the intimidating silence. "So, how have you been these past… years." He asks somewhat jokingly. I'm shocked at how leisurely he can be at this conversation. I'm more than a little wary.

"I've been fine…" I mumble confused. "How about you?" I ask, hoping he's open up.

"You could say I've been better," he answers in the vaguest way possible. It's uncanny to believe his skills in keeping things about him hidden. "So how are the others doing? They seem to be spending most of their time with you." He says to keep the conversation going. To my disbelief, I sense no harsh feelings from his words despite the obvious distaste he has for the situation.

"Who?" I ask despite knowing the answer. He's obviously talking about the three individuals who left him just a short while ago.

"Kaito-kun, Meiko-san, Lu-" His eyes get wild as he shakes his head. "Megurine-san" He corrects. I frown disappointed. Looks like he's not going to fight for her either.

"They're fine," I mumble dismissively. I see this as a chance to ask him about Luka, to get answers. "Are you worried about them or something?"

He chuckles again. "You could say that." He gives yet another vague answer. I'm finding this increasingly difficult.

"Well, are you worried about anybody in particular?" I press further, trying to mention Luka as subtle as I can. I peak at him. His eyes are raised at me. He smirks.

"Okay, if you want me to do so, I'll mention her." He says, seeing right through me. "I'm apparently worried about Megurine-san." Looks like the subtlety was useless after all.

"You really do, though?" I reassure

"I guess." Great, another vague answer.

This is going nowhere. I sigh inwardly at my incompetence. He read me like a book but I'm having trouble understanding even a single phrase of him. Seeing that approaching with caution would be useless, I get right to the point. I stop, boxes in hand and look directly at him.

"You still love her right?" I ask frankly, quite tired of playing his mind games.

He looks at me astonished, not expecting hearing that from me. At that moment, with his guard down, I could read him perfectly. I could read his _shock _perfectly. Why couldn't everything else be so easy?

"_Right_?" I reaffirm.

"I care for her…" Gakupo answers with the least opinionated answer possible. "I-I mean we've been together forever."

"I'm well aware of that," I state, quite annoyed. "But do you _love _her?" I ask putting emphasis on 'love'.

He surveys me for a while longer before walking away. "Sure. Whatever you say." I grip my hair slightly. The measure he put on his guard is just unbelievable.

"Fine," I say, dropping the subject for now. "Then at least you know you care for her enough to know that she's hurting." I catch up to him and his long strides.

"Of course I know," he states matter-of-factly. "Like I said, we were raised together; it'd be a shame if I can't read her after all this time."

"_But we still can't read you." _I think out loud.

"What was that?" Gakupo questions, eyebrows raised once again.

"Nothing," I excuse. The storage room finally comes to our path. Gakupo opens the door and we place the boxes in. As Gakupo is rearranging his boxes, I continue pressing. "If you know she's hurting, then why don't you do something about it?" I interrogate.

He looks at me passively and heads towards the door. "'Cause she specifically told me to stay away," He reasoned.

I get in his way, blocking him from getting out of the room and dismissing the conversation. "Then why don't you get _her _to talk?" I ask desperately, trying my best to convince him.

He laughs humorlessly as he walks around me. I turn around and follow him, not pleased until I get an answer, a true answer. "'Cause I have my reasons. Just like she has hers."

I look at him curiously. Could he know of Luka's true attempts? Her silent oath to change? Does she know he's only seen as an obstacle by her, an obstacle she needs to overcome? He couldn't have known. He can't have deduced that much from her from just speculation could he?

The rest of our walk was lined with silence with me buried in my thoughts and Gakupo busy in his. The front door soon showed itself to us and just as I was about to leave, thinking that was the last I would hear from Gakupo, I hear my name called out. "Rin-chan."

I turn back and look at Gakupo inquisitively. "Yes?"

He fidgets. "Umm… do me a favor…" He requests awkwardly. "Don't tell her about any of this. Don't tell anyone. This meeting is just between us, okay?" He lets out.

"Why?" I ask him confused.

He just shakes his head. "Reasons."

Even though that's the most distant answer I can get, I'll accept it for now. So as I turn around to leave, thinking he's stated all he needed to say, I hear him call out once more.

"And Rin-chan, one more thing." He calls out. "Take care of Luka for me. Watch her back." He walks directly next to me in front of the door. "She's gonna need help even if she wants to do this on her own. You need to be the one to help her since… since I won't be able to. Not for a while." With his statement over, Gakupo escaped from the front door and treads out while I'm left to think once again.

_So he knew. _He knew of Luka's attempts but never mentioned them. Exactly why he didn't still remains a mystery to me. And despite having a few answers solved, only more questions popped up. Surely, the whole of Gakupo Kamui still remains a mystery to me.

* * *

><p>The next morning I woke with a start. With the thoughts of yesterday's events still lingering in my mind, it was a pain to focus on anything else. The Hatsunes met with me at the front of the complex like usual and I was already dying to share yesterday's happenings. It only got worse when Meiko, Kaito, Kei, and especially Luka were waiting for us in front of the school gates. But I promised. I promised to Gakupo no one would know. Even knowing that conversing with Luka on my newfound knowledge would help her quite a bit, a promise is a promise and a promise is something I never plan to break.<p>

To keep myself from exploding, I try to think on other things. Only when I chose to do I remember finding Len to give thanks. I jump excitedly all of a sudden, feeling a surge of energy and, to my friends' surprise, sprint past everyone, calling out "Len-kun!"

I speed around the courtyard looking for Len. I hear the sound of footsteps behind me. I turn aound and see Luka Megurine struggling to catch up to me. I giggle and stop for the moment, surveying my surroundings while Luka catches up.

A crowd of rowdy students catch my attention. Scanning the crowd for any traces of Len, I find something more curious at the middle of the crowd. As soon as I confirmed what I saw, I hurriedly look back at Luka, worried.

She's looking at that direction as well, though a look of curiosity doesn't match her face. Instead, a look of devastation is in its place. And that's very understandable. Since what she's looking at is Gakupo Kamui, smugly standing in the middle of the crown boasting, his arm very intimately looped around a very attractive girl.

I look at Luka in worry before turning back to the scene. Gakupo is clearly staring at the two of us, a look of passing on his face. His eyes close shamefully for a second. His words from yesterday come back to me. _You need to be the one to help her since… since I won't be able to. Not for a while_. Is this what he meant? He opens his eyes and his gaze locks with mine. He smiles. I force myself to smile back. But all the while I'm thinking. Thinking what lies behind that smile. Gakupo what exactly are you hiding from us?

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **Okay, I'm a few days late! I know but I actually have an excuse this time! I had a draft done on Friday and I planned to finish it Saturday morning but apparently, my mom was expecting visitors so we had to go out for the weekend and I couldn't bring my laptop! So I had to finish it at Monday but even that was late since I coincidentally found 'Dango Daikazoku' in my playlists and well… for any Clannad fan, just guess what happened XD! So after rewatching certain scenes in the After Story and Fuko's arc, I was ready and inspired to work! (BTW, for those who haven't watched Clannad, GO! It WILL make you cry!) Which actually makes sense since a major inspiration for my stories are visual novels (IDK how I got here XD) and how my story is separated to arcs is purely based off of the visual novel and visual novel anime format! Yeah, so after that whole adventure down memory lane, at least I'm in the romantic mood for the next chapter (oopsies ;D ;D) RinLen shippers rejoice! It's about to get real fun for you guys! So… Gakupo's a douche, ne? Yeah, but I needed to add tension (and get the plotline of the Second Story) in here somewhere… This chapter was actually really hard to type since I didn't want to give much away yet… Okay, now just to inform y'all the midpoint of Link is very soon (Chapter 15) and it is what I like to call the Climax Chapter. It might not really be a true climax but it has a VERY big event. So the story's half over ^^! Hope you guys stick with me through this and follow the follow-ups! The ending is decided and I'm very happy with it! Though I'm not sure you readers'll be… ;D;D;D! Just you wait! Anyway, I'm done! R&R!

*Sempai/Senpai is interchangeable. I used 'sempai' since it's more commonly Romanized this way but 'senpai' is correct as well.


	14. Lost

**A/N: **Hi y'all! Good news! I reached 150 reviews! YAY! PARTY TIME! Now as a thank you, you'll be getting this very delicious (for those who want to eat Lenny up) chapter. Here it is, y'all, the chapter you've been waiting for, Len's chapter! This is where the real fun begins ^^! Now, with my ending planned of Link (I personally love it) I know exactly how much foreshadowing and development left I need to add. As an early warning for the next few chapters (and the last few actually), Kei, Meiko, and Kaito will show up less but that does not mean that they've lost their position as main characters. Because they're all still VERY important characters and most definitely still mains. It's just this they don't play very big parts in the next events which is gonna get Len-centric. Well enjoy this next chapter!

And just to inform all of you, I joined a collab account called **xUNLIMITEDx** and that's (partly) why this update is so late. The collab is amazing, filled with amazing writers, and already has a hefty amount of stories. What we do is write stories for as much Rin and Len songs as possible. I already have a couple of stories (a one-shot and a prologue for another story) so please check it out! I swear, KYUUxKYUU, macchi-chan, ChocoCookiePuff, Toan Daxland, and all the others are all brilliant!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Vocaloid. I couldn't even watch the live concert... D:

Thank you to **_CluelessLeaf, MaxJacksonCullenGirl, Rina Aria, hkdfan, Campanella, chibis of evil, pohkeemawn, ReturnOfTheWings, Davison, Len Fangirl 531, DokiDokiKyuuChan, KYUUxKYUU, Pomegranata, Pink Bottle of Kiseki, FrozenSekai, Smiak, A Dedication To The End, BloodyBlackRabbit, and Silent Affair for reviewing! _**I wouldn't still be going on with this story if it wasn't for you! Your reviews really inspire me and I wouldn't be here without your feedback!

And thank you to my bloody-brilliant betas: **_MusicGamer and CluelessLeaf! _**And now my new beta,**_ Campanella! _**Glad to have you guys here to help! I know I really need it!

**Summary: **Memories: They hold the very things we love and the very things we despise. Well, for this girl, Rin Kagamine, her memories are the link, the link that ties everyone and everything, including this story together. First part of the Memories Series! RinxLen

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 13: Lost<strong>

**(Rin's POV)**

Len Kagamine. What to say about Len Kagamine? I could talk about his crystal blue eyes, and how they're able to enchant anyone into a state of calm and tranquility. I could mention his soft golden hair, always so sloppy yet charming on that head of his. I could go on and on about his smile and his ability to light a whole room from depression to joy with its genuineness. I could converse about how a faint blush would always line his cheeks when he saw me, for whatever the silly reason. I could also share our childhood together- full of memories so dear and pristine- lying in the depths of our heart. Or I could talk about his relationship with me, or lack of one, since that's been what's on my mind for the whole of my walk home. We've been civil with each other but nothing more. What does he see me as? Does he still despise me and every bone of my body? If so, why does he did he did he go out of his way to help me that day? These questions line my mind, wishing to be answered by the boy in question- whom I've been spending the entire day seeking- wanting to thank him for what he's done. But fate hasn't been so generous, considering I haven't seen a trace of him at all since we parted ways. That is, until I reached my doorstep after my walk home.

Len Kagamine, the boy I can spend an eternity trying to understand, is standing patiently in front of my doorstep, seemingly waiting for me.

And waiting for me is apparently exactly what he was doing. As soon as I cross his line of site, he brightens up a little and somewhat awkwardly ushers me over. Despite my shock of how ideal this encounter is, I oblige to his gestures, starting to walk towards his way.

"R-rin-san!" He calls out nervously once I get to him. "H-hi," he greets, trying to extinguish the awkwardness of the situation. Good luck with that Len.

"Hi there, Len-kun," I greet back politely, discreetly raising an eyebrow at him. "What are you doing here?" I ask curiously.

"Umm. . . well, about that . . . " he mumbles. "How about we go inside first?" he prompts, gesturing to the door.

"Okay," I say, preparing my key but Len stops me and opens the door himself.

"Don't worry about it; Teto already let me in," he says simply walking into the foyer.

"Well if she already let you in, why were you waiting outside then, Len-kun?" I ask, confused by his reasoning.

He jumps slightly before letting out a grumble in response. "Ummm . . . "

Before he can explain, Teto strolls into the room conveniently. "It's 'cause he wanted to wait for you, Rinners! Isn't that _gentlemanly _of him?" She giggles. "It's his way of courting you," she whispers, winking to Len mischievously.

"I-it's not!" Len shouts. "A-and I w-wasn't waiting for you. I-I just wanted fresh air! Yeah, that's why," he excuses, turning his red face away from me.

"Keep telling yourself that, darling Lenny-kins," Teto says sarcastically, patting his shoulder. Len just glares at her.

Well," I cheer, trying to brighten him up, "I'm glad you I caught you out there on my way home!" I say. "It's just nice to see you." Len nods meekly.

"So . . . " I press. "You were gonna explain why you were here in the first place?"

"Oh, yeah!" He remembers, turning back to me with a serious expression on his face. "I need to talk to you about something!" He announces, surprising me. Well, with this, it looks like my chance to talk might be coming sooner than I thought.

"Okay, let's talk!" I say cheerily, leaning slightly towards him. "About?" I prod.

"I'm gonna leave you kids now," Teto excuses herself. "Good luck explaining Lenny," she says on her way out, prompting a nod from him.

"Well, my parents and Teto made plans for dinner this evening," he starts. "I already told Teto about it," he continues.

"Oh yeah?"I cheer, kicking off my shoes and choosing to walk into the living room. Len follows, still as sullen as ever. I take a seat as I say, "Well, that's nice. They haven't seen each other in a while, right?"

"Yeah they haven't, but . . . " Len hesitates with the remainder of his statement. His face straightens up as he calls out determinedly, "The-," he breathes out worriedly. "They'd like it if we join them this time," Len finishes with a stained smile.

"Hu-huh?" I question, shocked to hear this. Sure Teto and Len's parents, Atsuo and Aiko, occasionally meet up consider they as well as Ted and my parents were best friends back in the day but for obvious reasons, for the past few years, Len and I don't come along. And I thought they respected that as well as our diminishing friendship. But now they're practically demanding our presence? Right now, I don't understand the reasoning and timing behind it. "Wh-why do we have to come?" I inquire nervously.

"Well, my parents said they wanted to see you. I'm not too pleased about it myself. But they… missed you. They haven't seen you after you moved out," he says cautiously, sending me a guilty stare. I notice it immediately and choose to dismiss it. I don't want your guilt Len. A deathly silence spread between us as I just sat, thinking, remembering.

Well, of course they miss me, Atsuo-san and Aiko-san. I miss them desperately, too. They, along with Teto and Ted, have practically raised me after my parents' deaths. They welcomed me into their home after which and became my legal guardians and raised me alongside Len. But after the incident, I abruptly requested to move out for Len's sake, not telling them my reasons for doing so, again for Len and all the rest of them. After some protests from them, they allowed me to live with Teto as my guardian in her home with Ted, away from Len and far enough to give them space to forget about me. Just as Len said, I haven't been able to see them since. But I accepted that, knowing they were among those I had to give up. But now that I'm given the opportunity to regain the relationship I had with them, should I take it, even after knowing the trouble that might come with it? Would Len- the one I originally did this for- be okay with that?

"So you're coming?" Len lets out unsurely after a while. I take a while to observe him. He's nervous; that's for sure. His crystal blue eyes are clouded and that smile is way too fake to call genuine. He's grown up since the last time I've seen him this close, standing in front of me in what I can only call a passive stance. He doesn't seem to be overjoyed with my presence but he isn't rejecting it at the same time. But the longer I stare into him, the more I think about how I miss him rather than thinking about whether he's accept this encounter and whether our relationship is civil enough to handle it. But this may be the best chance I can get to find out.

"Are you okay with that?" I question, wanting his take.

He looks at me for a brief moment in what I could call a mixture of guilt, remorse, and hesitation. "I guess . . . " he replies.

I nod, looking back at him and his blue pools determinedly. "O-okay then . . . " I reply solemnly. "I'll come." I try to smile at Len despite the nervousness I feel.

"Really?" he asks, partially stunned by my answer. He knows exactly why I have my doubts. He knows exactly what memories might surface with me there. All I offer is a weak nod in response. "Th-that's great, I guess . . . " he says, still a little shocked of my easy compliance.

I tilt my head in question. "What's with the tone, Len-kun? Do you not want me to come?" I ask, lifting an eyebrow at him. Maybe this'll clear the air and let me get a clue at how he feels.

"N-no! That's not it! I want you to come!" he begins to say. I can't help but feel a little more assured after hearing him say this. "It's just I'm surprised you agreed so willingly after-"

"Yeah, I get it," I say, cutting him off. You don't need to finish that Len. I continue, saying, "But I miss them too. And anyway, this has nothing to do with me or the past. They just want to see me again after all these years."

"Yeah . . . " Len agrees, finally sitting down on the couch, next to me; too busy thinking to notice the close proximity between us. Another silence filled the room as both of us were stuck in our own heads, thinking about what would come next. But this one wasn't as uncomfortable as before. I had no idea what made this silence more bearable, but I had a feeling it had to do with the blond boy beside me. Maybe it was his warmth that soothed some of the tension I was feeling. That maybe it was pride and relief on coming into a mutual understanding. Or maybe it was hope, hope that I've gotten closer to the boy next to me, allowing us to rebuild a friendship lost.

After a while, Len gets up, a blank look on his face. "I should go now," he says airily. "My parents'll be overjoyed when I tell them."

"Okay," I say, getting up ready to follow him. "I'll tell Teto you'll be leaving."

"Thanks, I appreciate it." And with that, he's out the door once again, off to go about on his own. And suddenly, I felt the urge to follow him, follow him to wherever he takes me, just so I can learn more about him. Just as I thought I should head in- guessing he's too far off to acknowledge me- he turns back. "I'll see you tonight?" he calls out.

"Ye-yeah!" I reply with as much enthusiasm I could muster. He gives me one last smile before turning around. "And Len-kun!" I call out once again, being reminded of my purpose. "Thanks!" I yell. He looks at me for a second, seemingly looking for an explanation. "For everything!" All I offered was a smile and that seemed to be enough. Before long, though, he's turned around again, on his way back, but not without leaving me with a feeling of satisfaction.

* * *

><p>I stare at the sight in front of me, trying to calm my nerves. My hand is being pulled along, the matter of whether it has my consent not appearing to matter at all. I pull the hem of the red shawl of my winter pink dress- a little too fancy to my liking- with my other hand as I proceed to count backwards in order to calm my nerves, all the while unconsciously observing the place.<p>

_Five_; The walkway is still the same, the fancy cobblestone path leading to the extravagant front door with the occasional arch adorning it. I remember walking through this same path the day I was told this was going to be my new home. Tears were freely spilling all over my face and I refused to walk the path further, refusing to admit that _this _was where I was going to live, no matter how familiar or intricate this place is. I refused to say good-bye to my old home, to let go of my deceased parents.

_Four; _I see a little patch of tall shrubs and bushes- still managing to stay green despite the frigid weather on the outskirts of the well trimmed yard- covered by a white blanket of snow. In that place was a hiding spot only I know of, a little place I would escape to when I needed to be alone and let my feelings out during my stay here. In that little hiding place, the world and all the ones living in it could no longer see me nor hear me and I would be free to think whatever I want, do whatever I want. There, I would cry whenever I needed to, vent all the sorrow on my own so I wouldn't need to burden others with it. I didn't need to worry about being questioned or worried about since I knew if I was in that spot, no would find me. Oh, how I wish I could retreat there at that moment and let out all the frustration and worry I feel at the moment.

_Three; _An old playground, looking unused for years crosses my view. Lots of good times can be recalled in that playground; good times with all of them. Too bad it's in such a horrible state now. The monkey bars I remember playing on- falling off of just to be caught by a pair of not-so-strong arms, only to tumble in a heap and laughing it off as nothing and trying again- appear to be rusted and worn, the colorful yellow paint it used to brag about pealing. The formerly red slide I remember rushing to get onto in order to avoid the fighting over who goes first is covered in snow, unusable and uncared for. The swing set on the corner where I used to spend all day swinging, just to experience the wind zoom past me and the adrenaline of being so high in the air that you just feel like you could never be brought down, is swinging idly with the breeze, making an unpleasant squeak every time it moves, signaling its need of repair. It's a pretty great representation of my relationship with certain people. 'In need of repairing to its former glory.'

_Two; _I turn back to the gates that allowed us entry a few moments ago and the iron fence that surround it. It's funny; even though I just entered through that gate just mere seconds ago, the memory of me leaving through that very gate for, what I thought, was the last time, barges itself into my mind. I look back at the cold black steel of the gate and fence that surround the whole of the proximity. They were supposed to keep me from coming back here, the fence and gate. The moment I walked out as a young 13 year old, a suitcase of my belongings in one hand, the other clutching my new guardian, I had no plans of returning ever. The fence was supposed to be the iron bars of my heart, signaling my resolve to let go and never be able to come back, forcefully or by choice. And the closed gate would have signified my exit from my past life and my intent on keeping everything that happened in it unspoken. My Pandora's Box in a way. But looking at the gate, it's wide open for release and return, letting everything and anything come in and out at this point. In fact, the gate opened _specifically _for my entrance. And yet, nothing has occurred yet. This gives me a little bit more hope on rebuilding the past I swore to give up.

_One; _I peak through the front door once again, opened just for our presence. Through the front door, three individuals could be seen. A tall man, muscular in built, a cheery smile on his face, having hair the color of a comforting sandy blond. He's dressed in a tasteful pastel blue dress shirt with a matching tie in a darker shade of blue, while having a black coat and black slacks to finish his look off. The colors of his attire suit his eyes perfectly, making the crystal-like pools gleam brightly in excitement. An elegant woman is standing on the man's other side, who while shorter in comparison, is still quite far from being called little. Yet despite her model-like height, she could still be described as delicate and pristine, like a sweet, frail nadeshiko flower in full bloom. Her eyes are a wintry blue, more soothing than intense, and her light, flaxen, blonde hair is tied into a loose bun. She's wearing a simple yet flattering white cocktail gown, helping in showing her delightful curves. In between the two is a boy, lanky in appearance, dressed in an orange dress shirt with a cute bowtie loosely dangling off it, and simple grey pants. His hair, the color of gold like the woman, is neater than usual, but still retains its uncombed charm. Unlike the other two, the boy seems uncomfortable in both his attire and the situation. His eyes, the color of an intense royal blue, similar to the man's, is directly planted towards one direction: me.

_Zero_; Now is the moment to take action, the moment I take on my fears. It's either I sink even deeper in the abyss of my solitude, or swim a great distance in terms of rebuilding. I close my eyes peacefully. With my nerves calmer, I am able to think clearer. I open my eyes and look at the three in front of me very fixedly. Now is the moment.

"Len-kun," I say confidently. "Atsuo-san. Aiko-san. It's a pleasure to be here!" I greet happily, bowing in respect.

I hear Atsuo-san and Aiko-san giggle unexpectedly. Before I could do anything else, Atsuo-san walks over to me and slightly ruffles my hair which is neatly ties into my signature bow. "It's nice to see here to, Rinners," he says cheerfully, a happy gleam shining in his eyes. Aiko-san's eyes shine similarly. I look back at them and see no hostility, no remorse, no grudges. Just happiness. Happiness at seeing me.

The lack of tension was not foreseen, as I very well expected for Atsuo-san and Aiko-san to interrogate me right away of my previous actions. And they would have been justified to do so. But in the situation right now at that moment, I couldn't feel a drop of apprehension, just the pleasantness I always felt around Atsuo-san and Aiko-san. And it's nice to say the least.

"And it's nice to see Teto-chan here too!" Teto cheers animatedly, letting go of my hand and hugging Atsuo-san and Aiko-san wholeheartedly. Len skillfully moved out of her way, avoiding the glomp in mere milliseconds. "I missed you so much, Ai-chan! You too, At-tan!" She wails.

"It really has been a while," Aiko-san laughs, hugging Teto back, letting go of the attention she was giving me. "And I'm glad Rinners is here this time!" She says, glancing back towards me fondly.

"I know!" Teto replied fake-exasperatedly. "It took a while to get her here and all dressed up, too!" She surveys my pink gown approvingly. I look back at her, wearing a much more casual in comparison pleated dress with a small bolero.

"Oh, it was really no need to dress up!" Aiko-san responds, loudly. "All we wanted was for you to come!"

Teto giggles. "Yeah, you _say _that, but look at you Ai-chan. You're gorgeous!"

Aiko-san laughs back. "Oh, Teto-chan, there's no need for flattering. But thank you anyway."

"Oh, Ai-chan, so modest you," Teto calls back, waving her hand at Aiko-san.

"But you're looking fine as well Teto-chan," Aiko-san proceeds.

"Oh, stop!" Teto laughs back.

Len and I just stare in bewilderment at the two adults exchanging compliments relentlessly. After a little while longer, Atsuo-san huddles between us, patting our shoulders. He crouches down to our ears and whispers, "How about we go on in now, kids." He takes a look at his wife and friend. "I'm sure Ai-chan and Teto-chan'll snap out of it soon."

I nod while Len just takes off, yanking at his bowtie. I struggle to catch up with Len while Atsuo-san treads slowly behind us. The inside of the house is just as impressive as the outside, just as I remembered, with polished furniture and beautiful crafts and paintings expertly put together. The dining hall we get to sports a grand table with a spotless table cloth and a delicate glass chandelier in the middle of the table. Fine china is spread all over the table and a generous amount of foods are already prepared in heaps. In the far side of the table, I see Len take his seat. In the corner of my eye, I see Atsuo-san already seated at the head of the table glancing at me.

"Oh, Rinners, sit anywhere you like. The seat next to my Lenny is open, but I'm not hinting anything," Atsuo-san tells me, acting nonchalant at the last statement, but still making his motive blaringly obvious. I peak over at Len who's glaring at his grinning father. I tread over to the spot Atsuo-san was talking about and turn towards Len.

"Do you mind if I sit here?" I ask him, asking for confirmation. He looks up at me and blushes. He keeps his gaze at me for a while, speechless before turning away shyly, planting his eyes on his empty plate.

"Not at all. It's not like I care . . . " he responds quietly, causing his father to chuckle at him.

"Okay," I breathe out, firmly taking the seat. I look over at the beautiful array of foods prepared before me. There's a bread bowl holding a variety of diverse bread, an enticing broth colored with an assortment of vegetables, a platter of thin pasta with a white creamy sauce as a topping, a colorful salad of fresh greens, and a large roast, beautifully roasted to perfection. The wonderful aroma of the food slithers into my nose causing my stomach to squeal. "All of this food looks delicious!" I call out joyously.

Atsuo-san smiles at me. "Ai-chan prepared it all herself. Once she heard from Lenny that you were coming as well, she went all out," he replied enthusiastically.

"There really was no need to, though! This doesn't really call for a celebration . . . " I excuse.

"What are you talking about, Rinners?" Aiko-san questions, walking into the dining room with Teto. "Of course this calls for a celebration!" She laughs jovially. "We haven't seen you in years!"

Despite the touchy subject mentioned, none of the adults seem to falter at all. That's probably because they don't know it's a touchy subject in the first place. But I do. And because I know, a sudden pang of guilt surges through me that causes my smile to harden. I see Len flinch unnaturally from my side. We exchange a glance for a second. In that moment, I saw all the guilt and sadness he was feeling. _Of course, he doesn't want his parents to know._ I conjure up a smile to him. _Don't worry Len-kun, I have no plans of telling them either. _It'll be much simpler that way. He turns away in what I can see confusion and relief mixed together.

"Y-yeah . . . Sorry about that." I reply. "I-I guess I-I was just too afraid to come here . . . " I mumble incoherently. It's not a lie, sure, but it's not the complete truth either.

Aiko-san gives me a gentle smile. "Well, you're here now and that's all that matters," she laughs delicately, sounding different that the carefree laugh she just let out moments ago. This laugh sounded calming, soothing, careful, and_ maternal _in a way, like the sound of bells ringing harmoniously to callous ears. For some reason, after hearing the reminiscent sound of it, I find it harder to keep up my fake smile, the smile I put up to cover the turmoil inside my mind.

The room is silent with Len and I passively staring at other things to keep our minds busy and Atsuo-san and Aiko-san gazing at the two of us, seriously, yet not sternly. After a moment of silence, Teto, I guess noticing our sullen faces, calls out, "All right, time to stop the serious act. We came here to have fun!" She looks towards me, sending me a bright grin. "Now how 'bout we eat?"

Atsuo-san merrily chortles, transforming back to his usual self. "Well put, Teto-chan. Let's eat everyone!"

Soon enough the food was distributed and we were prompted to eat. For reason, I didn't enjoy the amazing cuisine as much as I would have of thought. I just suddenly lost my appetite and the motivation to keep my smile apparent. Right now, I just felt washed out. As if I just noticed how much I really lost when I ran away. This irreplaceable, internal feeling of security and pleasantness; I missed it more than I thought. I feel my eyes get misty and my lip start to quiver. Before the inevitable outcome of me crying could occur, I quickly tried to snap out of it, shaking my head defiantly, refusing to shed tears.

I looked up to check if anyone noticed my little break of self-control. The jubilee still lingers in the air as the conversations continue without pause. It appears no one noticed. I feel a little bit of relief seep into my stomach. But that wasn't even close enough to settle the unsettling feeling lying there. I just wanted that feeling to go away so I could fully enjoy this meeting like I was supposed to.

I feel a gaze burning at me. I look to my side and see Len staring right at me with a very thoughtful expression on his face. He's slouched on his chair, playing with his food dismissively. There's a very intense feeling glowing in his eyes. By the looks of things, he's burdened as well.

But what _exactly _is burdening us? The abruptness of this meeting and the questionable motives behind it? Maybe. But all I know for sure is that I want this heavy feeling in my chest out of me. And it looks like the time for me to take a risk here.

I take a deep breath. I want answers. That I'm pretty sure about. Maybe it'll ease the load to know why exactly I'm here. "Umm . . . excuse me," I voice out clearly, contributing to the lengthy conversation for the first time. Everyone on the table looks at me intently. I feel a faint blush creep its way into my cheeks. "Sorry for disturbing but this has kinda been in my mind for a while . . . " I mumble off. I see Len raise an brow at me. "If you don't mind me asking . . . why did you invite me here in the first place, so out of the blue?" I inquire, not feeling that sure of myself.

"Well," Atsuo-san says, dropping his knife and fork and dabbing his mouth with his napkin. "I guess we can only keep things fun and silly for a while. It looks like we have to get serious." He nods sternly at his while to which she nods back. The two parents along with Teto scan Len and I somberly, a total transition to their silly grins from before. "To tell you the truth, Rinners, we asked especially for you to come for a reason," Atsuo-san continues urgently. "We wanted to discuss things with you and Lenny." Len and I look at the three adults intently.

"Yes, I understand," I say, preparing to hear what I feared the most; that they wanted to know the reason why I left.

"Good," Atsuo-san proceeds. "Then you know how important this matter is to me, Ai-chan, and Teto-chan," Atsuo-san says. I nod slightly. "Well we invited you here to talk about your future with our Lenny, Rinners," Atsuo-san finishes, a sudden grin reaching his face.

After taking a while to comprehend what he just said, I dumbly uttered, "Eh?" I look over at Len who's got his head planted on the table, hiding his face shamefully. "I-I don't understand."

"You see Rinners," Aiko-san explains. "Teto-chan said you have new suitors." I turn over to Teto who's nodding repeatedly, agreeing with Aiko-san's words. "And we were wondering whether our Lenny-kins still has a chance."

"Yes!" Teto comments knowingly. "Rinners here seems to be very attached to Mikuo-kun and Kei-kun." I hear Len snarl in the background as I watch Atsuo-san and Aiko-san nod intently, Aiko-san even biting her lip worriedly.

I shake my head, utterly confused. The serious faces are still planted on their face. "I'm sorry, but I'm still confused. A chance in what?" I ask them.

"Rinners," Atsuo-san calls me over, looking serious. "I won't hand over my Lenny to any girl," he proceeds to say.

"Tou-san!" Len complains desperately, looking more embarrassed than ever. "Don-"

"Hush now, Lenny," his father silences him. He turns back to me. "As I was saying, not any girl would do for our Lenny. He's gonna need a wife that knows everything about him so she can take care of him and all his needs."

"Tou-san . . . " Len drones again.

"Lenny," Atsuo-san reprimands his son apprehensively, yet not leaving his gaze from me. "We think that girl can only be you, Rinners," He finishes, walking up to me and patting my head. I stupidly point to myself in question, still overwhelmed by and not following the whole thing. "So we wanted you to come so we can ask you this: Are you in love any of those boys? Is my Lenny that hopeless in love?" Atsuo-san cries out.

That statement snapped my feet back into reality. After hearing what Atsuo-san said and only thinking of what he said, I feel my face heat up tremendously."N-no! It's n-not like that!" I stutter, feeling the need to hide my face. "Mikuo and Kei-kun are just really good friends!" I assure, causing the adults in the room-sans Teto, of course- to sigh in relief.

"Well that's a relief," Aiko-san says. "So you hear, Lenny? You still have a chance! Isn't that great?" She cheers to her son, who appears frozen in shame. "How about you get the cake then?" Aiko-san suggests. Len just nodded rigidly before struggling to walk out of the room silently, his knees buckling with embarrassment.

"He's been quiet," Teto comments quietly on his way out of the dining room. "You were right," She states to Atsuo-san and Aiko-san.

"Yeah . . . " Aiko-san sighs, watching her son's retreating form. "I'm still worried about him . . . "

Lost, I inquire, "W-what are you talking about?" I follow their gazes to Len.

Atsuo-san chuckles. "Rin, we didn't really call you here to ask you that question though it is a bit of a relief," he tells me seriously, using my given name. I look at him in question yet again. Referring to his son, he remarks, "He's been lonely lately. Kai-kun, Mei-chan, and the rest of them don't come over as often," he comments. I feel slightly guilty. It's probably my fault they don't come over as much. They're too busy with me. So Len is lonely because of me?

"And he has that look on his face," Atsuo-san observes. "That look he gets only when he has something on his mind. And when we asked him about it, he didn't say a thing but your name, _Rin_." I feel shocked hearing this. Len was thinking about me?

"W-why would he call my name?" I ask.

"We're not sure ourselves," Atsuo-san answers, sending me a worried frown. "That's partially why we were so insistent to bring you here. We wanted to see if he behaved any differently when you're around since I know you haven't been as close lately." He sighs. "But we're getting nothing."

"So, Rin," Aiko-san takes over. "Can you do us a favor?" I nod obediently. "Can you talk to Len for us?"

"O-okay . . . " I answer unsurely. Has Len really been that troubled? How come I haven't noticed? Is our relationship that distant that I've stopped seeing when something is hurting him?

"That's great!" Atsuo-san comments surprisingly cheerily, changing the mood once again. I look up at him and see he's wearing his smile again. Similarly, Teto and Aiko-san are grinning as well. I look at them confused until, that is, I see Len back in the room, carrying a very dazzling layered cake. So they changed back the moment he entered the room . . . . Have they always been this deceptive, capable of skillfully masking their thoughts with a smile? Have they been doing this the whole time, hiding their worries from us? I push all that back into the back of my head as I try to play along, smiling towards Len.

"The cake is gorgeous!" Teto remarks delightfully about the perfectly constructed cake. "I bet Ai-chan made it from scratch!"

"Oh, Teto-chan, you flatter me so~" Aiko-san jokes. At this moment, I'm staring at the two wide-mouthed, commending their ability to act so joyously so flawlessly.

"Well," Atsuo-san announces, looking at me with a glowing smile. I close my mouth consciously. "Let's dig in!"

* * *

><p>I look at him from the lofty living room couch I'm sitting on, surveying him for even a single of the stress mentioned by his parents. Dinner and dessert passed by and ever since the talk I had with Atsuo and Aiko Kagamine, I've kept my eyes planted on their son, Len Kagamine. He's slouching on the luxurious loveseat he's sitting in, but that's normal as he's like that unless he's spectacularly excited. His eyes have minor bags under them, hinting lack of sleep, but I could blame that for the loads of school work we've received since we're coming close to our final tests. He's slightly pink but I've learned to get used to that as he's always one tone of red or another whenever he's in my proximity. Maybe it's the hostility of seeing me that causes this, I don't know, but I don't think it has any part of the loneliness and stress suggested by his parents before.<p>

He notices me staring at him and looks my way occasionally, like he's doing now, letting our two blue pools meet with a flourish. Whenever that happens, I just send him a carefree smile, a smile that suggests that everything's okay. And after which, he just turns away dazed, the same blank look in his eyes.

Other than the minor little signs I noticed in my minutes of observing him, the only other thing that's suspicious to me is that look. The blank look lingering in his crystal clear blue eyes that make them seem darker than they are. There's not that spark in them that he had before. Maybe this is that look Atsuo-san was talking about, the look he has only when something's deemed wrong by him.

"I'm gonna go to my room now, Kaa-san, Tou-san," Len calls out to his parents suddenly, ceasing the conversation they were having with Teto very abruptly.

Okay, dear," Aiko-san acknowledges kindly. "But why don't you take Rinners with you? Give her a tour of the house. I mean she hasn't been here for a while," She adds, gesturing towards me. She's smiling that same cheery smile she was wearing the moment Len walked into the room back then. The smile, I know now, that signals she's thinking. Right now, I think she's giving me the opportunity to talk with Len. I look at him cautiously. He just nods slowly facing me before walking away, maybe expecting me to follow.

I nod towards the adults wearing their unnoticeable masks and follow Len out. I head out of the loft and move towards Len who's walking ahead. I soon stop after hearing voices continue talking in the room behind me.

"She's sure has grown," the voice of Aiko-san comments as soon as I took my leave. "She looks almost exactly like her." She sighs reminiscently. Even through the wall, somehow, I can tell she's smiling- for real this time.

"She sure has." This time Atsuo-san's voice rings through the wall. By now, I should be catching up to Len but I'm drawn to listening to what they have to say. I unconsciously place my hand on the white ribbon on my head, stroking it gently as I crouch down on the floor, listening to them talk. "She even acts like her. Just as clueless as ever." He laughs pleasantly.

"I agree," Teto's voice remarks. "But it's cute and endearing on her." She giggles. "She has _his _nose however."

"It must have been great to watch over her grow up these years, Teto-chan," Aiko-san says somewhat painfully yet not bitterly. "I'm just a little sad I missed watching over her." I have a feeling Teto's nodding, traveling the past. I feel a bit of regret surf through me once again.

"You know, we still don't really know why she left so suddenly . . . " Atsuo-san observes. I feel myself wince internally. So they _have_ been wondering.

"Now, now At-tan," Aiko-san scolds her husband. "We shouldn't push her. She'll tell us when and if she wants to," she finishes with what I can guess is a sigh.

I think of what they just said. "When I feel like it, huh?" I whisper my thoughts silently. "I'm sorry everyone but I don't think I ever will feel comfortable," I voice as if actually speaking to them. I shake my head foolishly, scolding myself for talking. What follows next is a heavy silence, probably the time when all three are stuck in their own thoughts.

After another while, I hear Teto talk. "Okay, this night is getting a little too sullen for my tastes," she remarks loudly. "How about we get out the vodka and be adults?" She giggles. Laughter and cheery words of agreement ensues from the other two. I even find a smile on my face. You could always count on Teto to cheer everyone up. But, I wonder. Does she have one of those unnoticeable masks too? That maybe when she cheers everyone on, she has things in her mind as well. Yeah, just maybe.

Hearing the laughter continue, I consider the conversation they had concluded. I smile as I get up. I look around and notice for the first time that Len's nowhere to be found. He must have left already. Just as I was about to call his name, I remember the people in the room next to me just in the nick of time. If I do that, they'd guess I heard everything. Feeling no other choice, I walk into one of the long hallways in order to look for him.

The place in just as confusing as I remembered it, unfortunately. The house itself is huge and the long hallways with the seemingly random doors popping out of nowhere don't help in understanding this place either. I remember even in the days I lived here, I'd always get lost. And in those times, Len would always be the one to find me. I'm only wishing using false hope if I expect Len to do the same this time.

I keep walking the sinuous hallways, only wishing for a familiar site to be able to guide me back. To my dismay, nothing strikes out. That is, I reach a pink door at the corner of one hallway. And standing in front of the knob is a familiar looking blond boy. It's uncanny on how fate likes to play with me. "The Lost Room," the two of us whisper.

He looks back at me, completely shocked and unaware of my presence. I, on the other hand just walk up to the door in a trance, completely drawn to it. Len's eyes follow me the whole way. "Ri-rin . . . " he mumbles. "What are you doing here?"

I shrug. "I was lost . . . " I whisper back, giggling to myself. _Just like when we found this room._

* * *

><p>An eight year old me was walking aimlessly at the halls of the grand house, not having the slightest clue where she was going. It was a shame, really. I've been living at the house for a year then. It looked like I was going to have to rely on him again. Feeling discouraged, I called out his name. "Len?" I call out desperately. "Can you hear me, Len? I'm lost again!" I wailed, feeling tears surface on my face. I sighed and decided to keep walking. Just as I was about to go, I hear a voice yell out.<p>

"Rin!" Len called, looking worriedly at me. "I finally found you!" Len spat between pants.

I wrapped my arms around him instantly, causing him to blush remarkably. "Oh, Len, I'm so glad you found me! Can you take me back to Atsuo-san and Aiko-san, now?" I asked him.

He just looked back at me cheekily. "A-about that Rin . . . " He grumbles. "To tell you the truth, I'm pretty lost too," Len laughed , rubbing the backside of his head meekly. "I just walked around to find you . . . "

"Eh?" I yelled out worriedly. "So we can't go back?" I started to feel tears come to me again.

"No, no, we can!" Len assures, rubbing my back comfortingly. "Let me take the lead! I'm sure can rescue you like a super hero!" He announced, childishly pointing towards himself.

I found myself giggling at his antics. "Okay, Len. Be my hero!" I called out grabbing his hand, causing an expected blush to reach his face.

"O-okay," Len answered back, leading me further into the maze of hallways. Eventually, a pink door in the corner of the room attracted my attention. "Oooh! Len, what's in that door?" I asked, pointing to the said door, painted in baby pink.

"I don't know," Len replied, a thoughtful scowl on his face. "You want to see what's in it?" he offered. I nodded excitedly.

As soon as Len turned the knob, the two of gasped at the room's content. "This place is amazing!" I call out.

"Yeah . . . " Len agrees humbly. "I never even knew this place existed."

"We should name it then!" I remark blissfully. "Since we're like discovering it!"

"Yeah!" He called out pumping your fist in the air. "What should we name it, though?"

"I know!" I cheer, pulling Len in with me. "The Lost Room!"

* * *

><p>"The Lost Room," I mumble thoughtfully. I turn to the blond next to me who's wearing a pout. "Should we go in?" I ask him.<p>

"What could it hurt?" he replies with a shrug. Slowly he turns the knob. Inside, I'm bombarded with memories.

Everything appears to be untouched from when we first entered the room. The numerous toys lie unpicked on the ground, ranging from fancy dolls to silly jack-in-the-boxes. The bookshelf of dusty children books covers an entire wall of the room, while the other three walls, colored a bright blue in a pattern of baby blue and bright pink, are decorated with little juvenile drawings. A pile of unused art supplies lie in a heap in another corner of the room, surrounded by the countless stuffed animals. In the middle of the room is a small table, with misplaced toy blocks arranged to spell 'RIN AND LEN'.

Unknowingly, letting the memories take over me, I find myself muttering, "How did the two of us get here again?"

I continue looking around the room, fascinated by the toys just as I was before at the age of eight. Len, however, stayed firmly planted in front of the desk with the arranged blocks spelling our names. He looks at me for a good while before responding.

"I guess we followed our past selves back here." He says sullenly.

This triggers something in me. "Our past selves?" I repeat. "We've been following our past selves all this time?" I question. Len shrugs dismissively. I giggle humorlessly, involuntarily. _So according to Len, I've been following the me I wanted to get over. How ironic._ But I see truth in it.

I look around the reminiscent room I'm wondering. _This _is where I followed my past self to, huh? I unknowingly feel a smile reach my face. Without thinking about the situation I'm in, I voice my thoughts, letting them fly freely off my mouth.

"I just realized how important who I was matters right now. How who I used to be can still affect what happens right now." I turn towards Len who's still engrossed on the toy blocks. "But I'm learning that following your past self and falling back into old habits isn't the best way of living either. Since if you just follow up with your habits and 'go with the flow' you'll eventually end up . . . lost."

I survey the room around me. The Lost Room. How fitting. "Sure, while you're lost, you discover new things, meet new people, find new places, learn new things about yourself. But no matter how you see it or choose to do while you're lost, you're still _lost_, and while you're lost, you're still yearning to be found." Len's looking straight at me by now and I stare back confidentially, my smile broadening. I inch closer to him.

"So that's why you have to break free of your old self and decide your own path at some point. So you can find yourself again." I stand next to Len silently and impulsively reach for his hand. If I latch on to Len's hand like this, just like before, where will he take me? "I-I want to be found again, Len-kun," I mumble weakly.

Snapping out of the momentarily trance I was in, only now do I notice the proximity between Len and I. Len's obviously red, staring at our intertwined hands in awe. I pull back by reflex, embarrassed at being so close with Len and the nonsense I just fed him.

"I-I'm sorry, Len-kun!" I apologize as I pull back. To my surprise, Len's still holds on tightly, refusing to let go. I back away slightly and see his eyes clenched and his body tense. "Len-kun?" I call to him worriedly.

After a while, Len opened his eyes and proceeds to dive into mine, a look more vulnerable and open than he's ever given me flashing in his eyes. "I miss this . . ." he utters simply. There's truth in his expression. "I miss you . . . " he mumbles. I just stare at him in shock.

Realizing what he just said, Len's eyes widen and he jumps back humiliated dropping my rigid hand. "S-sorry, Rin-san! I-I didn't know what I was doing!" he excuses.

I shake my head speedily, still a bit pink, and say, "N-no, i-it's okay, Len-kun," I reassure him with a slight, shy smile. "I missed you too," I venture bravely.

He stares at me surprised, before turning away. "I-I just miss the two of us together like this."

I smile at him. "I do too."

He sighs, leaning towards me. "Sometimes I wish things were like they used to be. When we were all together as friends." He sighs.

I frown a little hearing this. I move closer to him. "But it isn't like old times," I tell him seriously. "We're not there anymore."

"I know that . . . " he mumbles disappointed. "It's just like I said, I miss you," he says, somewhat annoyed. He must be uncomfortable saying that.

"Then there's no need to wish for the past to fix that," I giggle somewhat to clear the air. "Didn't I just tell you not to fall back into old habits?" I ask. He nods unsurely.

"Then instead of moaning about the past, do something about the future!" I cheer, suddenly feeling lighter.

"But there's the problem. I don't know _what _to do. How to fix things." Len grumbles.

"Then let me help you," I offer, a grin on my face. "If it's okay with you, I'd want to help you find a way to fix things." _So Rin, can you do us a favor? Can you talk to Len for us? _Aiko's words from earlier today reemerge in my brain. Right now, I think I'm making sense of them. I open my mouth carefully. "But in order for me, or anyone at all to help you," I pause looking strongly at him thinking of Aiko-san, Atsuo-san, Teto, and the rest of them. They want to help Len too. "You need to open up and talk."

He looks at me before walking off, leaning on the relatively low table in the middle of the room. Quietly, he whispers, "Talking is pretty hard though. Even in simple conversations, you can't help but doubt the things you say, the impression you're making."

"Yeah," I agree, following him to the table and sitting on it leisurely. "But not talking is just as bad, worse actually. If you don't say anything at all, you'll wind up regretting it and wondering what could have turned out happening if you did speak out- if you tried getting your thoughts to someone." I smile at him slightly. "I should know that myself."

A brief silence passes through us, during which I spend my time just there, enjoying the company of the boy next to me. It's nostalgic.

"Let's be friends again," I say straightforwardly, completely out of the blue. I stand and face towards him.

"Wh-wha?" He looks at me, completely taken aback. "H-how can you ask for that so easily?"

I smile at him once again. "Why would it be hard?" I state simply, naively. I smirk with a gentle confidence. "We both admittedly need someone to talk to," I restate. "How about we start with each other? You know, have each other's backs." My smile broadens. "That way, it's just like old times; only not," I giggle.

He looks at me exasperated before letting out a small chuckle. Shaking his head incredulously, he mumbles, "Same old Rin . . . " He grins at me affectionately. "Okay, it's a deal, Rin-sa-"

"Rin-chan," I correct him. "Call me Rin-chan, 'kay? Friends can call each other with that."

He nods. "Then are you gonna call me Len-chan from now on?" He jokes teasingly.

"Yeah!" I agreed with a giggle, liking his idea.

He gives me a disbelieving look. "A-are you serious?" He asks.

I giggle. "Of course, Len-chan!"

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><p>I study the blond boy next to me, my apparent new- or renewed, really- friend. He looks so much more at peace now compared to the anxious teenage boy I was dealing with earlier this day. He has a smile rested at ease on his face which is also more calm and relaxed, yet slightly pink from what I'm guessing is the cold. One of his hands is resting in his coat pocket while the other-the one towards me- is dangling loosely at his side, seemingly in need of something to do. I wonder what though? Even the vibe I get from him is more comfortable, a drastic change from the usual awkwardness I usually feel whenever we were ever this close. Right now, with the calming air surrounding us, I feel like I can share anything with him.<p>

The light snow swivels past us delicately as the two of us walk warmly side by side, on our way to my house. Len decided to walk me home despite my insistent protests. You see, as soon as we navigated ourselves back to the loft where the adults were, we found a very silly sight in front of us involving a very affectionate Aiko-san and a very wobbly Teto, both of whom intoxicated. After a humorous scene ensued, it was agreed on that Teto would just spend the night at the Kagamine residence seeing she didn't seem capable of walking short distance let alone back home. An offer to stay over was given to me as well, but I refused, using my lack of sleepwear as an excuse to rid the protests from Atsuo-san and Aiko-san.

After a few more attempts and coercions to make me stay, I deemed it time to go and was about to leave before Len- who was bashful the whole time, irritated at the scene we walked into and turning red and jumpy when the matter of me sleeping over reached the conversation- decided to stop me. He offered a walk home to which I refused. But he used his persistence- which I'm sure he inherited from both his parents- to keep me from refusing and eventually to drive me to relent to him. And now, here we are, walking home on a light blanket of snow. Time flew by in a comfortable silence and soon enough, the doorway to the house was in view. As I shuffle around Teto's purse that was given to me for a key, I hear Len shifting nervously. He's thinking about something.

As I finally locate my key, I look at Len. "Is there something in your mind?" I ask him. He licks his lips nervously, looking down on the ground. "'Cause you know you can tell me, right?" He nods.

"Hey Rin-chan?" Len calls for my attention.

"Hmm?" I respond. He's looking somewhat troubled again, causing me to worry.

"Can I ask a question?" he asks warily, a major shift in mood from just moments ago.

"Sure, Len-chan." I say with just as much wariness. Something's not right.

"Well, about 3 years ago . . . " he starts unsettlingly. He peaks over at me as I involuntarily flinch as my body gets consumed by the worry. _Why mention this now, Len? _

Seeing my evident guardedness, he goes on to apologize. "I'm sorry for mentioning this now. I know it's not the most . . . pleasant topic to talk about." He tries to laugh awkwardly to lighten the mood, failing to do so in my opinion. "It's just . . . it's just been bothering me for a while."

I take a deep breath. I look over at his worried stance, doubtful expression, and desperate tinge in his eyes. No, I can't leave our newly formed friendship continue to be like this; always so awkward and unsure. We have to build trust. "No, i-it's okay," I say as naturally as I can. This matter has to be cleared eventually so it might as well be now.

"Okay . . . " He glances at me. "Well, about those rumors. The ones that are about you. The ones that say bad things." He continues, making sure to watch me precisely.

"Uh-huh?" I manage to breathe out weakly.

"Are they true?" Len asks quite desperately. "Are all those things being said about you really true?" He looks over at me. I'm just standing in front of him, too paralyzed to give an answer. I see him clench his fists tightly and quiver irritably. He continues, his volume rising with his desperation for an answer. "Are you really the cheater they say you are? A-are you really behind all those fights? A-are y-you really that b-bitch people tell me you are? Th-the one they taught me to hate?" he inquires intensely, shaking his head ferociously, his voice rising with tension. I just stand there rigidly; face down and hidden, weakly squeezing my hands in nervousness. "C-can you answer m-me, Ri-… K-kagamine-san?" Len asks shakily.

I look over at him, surveying him once again. The relationship I have with him- a relation just so recently earned- once again on my mind on this walk home, this time thoughts of its near disappearance haunting my mind. The childhood we shared together and the things I learned about him over the years being unimportant to the current situation. Both the blush on his cheeks and the breathtaking smile on his lips, so customary to my image of him, no longer being there. His sloppy blond hair being rustled carelessly by the sudden wind, planted firmly on his head yet delicately getting maneuvered by outside forces. His crystal-clear, blue eyes glowing with an intense yet hopeful glint in them. _I'm sorry, Len, but I just can't answer you. I can't have you losing hope. _

I smile at him thoughtfully, surprising him. "I could answer you and get it over with," I start, a grin miraculously still etched on my face. I look deep into his blue pools meaningfully, making note of the undeniable hope that lies there. "But it looks like you already made a conclusion and I'm not gonna bother changing your mind," I say, turning my back to him, releasing the fake confident smile that was so tiring to keep on my face. I look back one final time, this time with a slight yet genuine smile on my features. "I'm gonna let you change it yourself." I give him one last wink before walking into the house, unlocking the lock and turning the knob in a few quick motions.

As soon as I get in, I collapse immediately- sliding down the door painfully- just too overwhelmed by the tension before. I peak outside cautiously from a nearby window. Len's still standing there, his hair covering his eyes, posture slumped. He's thinking again. Thinking about the recent conversation we just had, the words I said, the thoughts I was referring to. Out there in the middle of the snow, Len's the one looking . . . _lost_, more lost than ever. And he is genuinely lost. I know that. But I trust in him to be able to find himself, to be able to answer his own questions. But now, what to do about myself . . . ?

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><p><strong>AN:** A full month, huh? Really it's been that long since I updated? Gosh, I REALLY suck! I guess the reason for such lateness was a mix of laziness, anxiety since school's starting, outside projects (**xUNLIMITEDx** and the like which is amazingly epic to remind you all) and just life in general DX! I'm sorry I had you all waiting! I really love you guys and your feedback so much! And I left off at such a crucial part too! But I hope this chapter is enough for you to forgive me. If it's not, really I understand. Since I suck so much anyway DX Well, this chapter's most definitely my longest (10,000 words? Seriously?) and I never expected my chapter's to be this long. I could never imagine filling THIS in my original 2,000-3,000 word space way-back-when when this fic started! I can't help but feel to have grown so much! And I've met such wonderful writers and people, I just can't imagine my life without FF now ;_;. Sorry for being emotion but I'm just so thankful! Now back to the story, this chapter's all about Len, huh? I initially had a bit of a hangover when I decided it would just be Len and Rin with their (fun, I hope) guardians and without anyone else. So that meant no Mikuo or MIKU! DX I was sad but seeing how this turned out, I'm pretty happy with the outcome! So yeah, next chapter'll be the climax chapter and after that the later half of the story. (which I'm REALLY excited for since it's all planned out and really fun! Chapter 18'll be such the pleaser 8D) So, yeah, that's about it XD. Please forgive me and R&R. Every review gets me jumping and I really appreciate all of them!

**P.S: **Just to mention to those who don't read profile's anymore (DX) I have a **tumblr** account! It's **.com**. (It's 'tsundere-me'since tsundereme was already taken DX) It's also linked on my profile page and the **xUNLIMITEDx **page. There you can contact me (or you could just email, I'd always love to answer) and find out any news on my stories like their progress or if I'll ever be unavailable. Other than that, I'll also post little tidbits and funfacts on my stories there like Character Bios, facts about Kaizo, Trivia, etc. Be sure to check it out!


	15. Rebuild

Hello? Anyone still out there? Guess not. No one missed me either I take. Oh well.

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><p><strong>Len's POV<strong>

Rin Kagamine. My girl next door. As the story stereo-typically goes in those scarily annoying chick-flicks, she's the girl who's kind, considerate, and supportive, taking over a huge role of my childhood. The girl I've known my whole life, the girl whose secrets I know, and the girl who I entrust my secrets to. The girl who'll fall in love with me, and the girl I'll eventually build a life with.

But that's all going under stereotypes, a generalization of those shallow movies - which I swear I don't watch by the way, and don't always reflect on the truth. Since Rin Kagamine, my girl next door, is also the girl I just walked away from, the girl I just threw away from my life once again.

Looking around what is now her home, I ponder on the fact that she and I no longer live next door. Through that logic, I guess she really isn't my girl next door anymore. For all I know, she isn't as kind, considerate, and as supporting as she seems. I don't know her secrets anymore, and likewise she doesn't know mine. Hell, I don't know even truly _know_ her anymore, if you know what I mean. And if you don't, I'm not that sure either so please don't ask for further explanation. I'm a teenage boy, and I don't really like explaining my feelings nor am I entirely sure how to express the ones I'm sure about. But she isn't the girl I'll build a life with, the girl who'll fall in love with me in the end of the story. All I know is that despite everything, that truth makes me sad for some reason.

But an undeniable fact is that she was a huge part of my childhood. I'd even say she was my childhood, since my dearest memories of my past involve her. Running down hills with her, tricking people into we were twins - it's scary how alike we look, to the point I was afraid my little bit of a crush on her (I swear it was only a little crush, nothing more!) could be considered narcissism - with her, and enjoying the Hanabi festival with her. Those are my most prominent and, as sappy as it sounds, my_ happiest_ memories.

But that was the past and this is the present, which allow me to say, is_ extremely_ screwed up. I seriously have no idea what to believe anymore. My girl next door, the girl I'm supposed to know from her head to her toes, is the girl that confuses me most. Am I supposed to believe what the others are telling me about her? That she's cruel, menacing, and unforgiving? But she still seems and acts like the same girl next door I knew before.

But then again, there was that incident all those years ago ... which I'd rather avoid from thinking of.

It was the catalyst to me originally breaking ties with her. I thought what I saw with my own eyes was true, that what I saw myself would be enough evidence to justify those claims against her, but something about her disposition just tells be to believe otherwise. After that incident, I promised to distance myself from her after she started to distance herself from us, and thinking about the way she acted still angers me to this day.

But things seem to be changing. Luka-chan, Kaito-kun, Meiko-chan, they all seem to be flocking back to her, forgiving her. I don't know if it's for my own selfish reasons, my own personal hurt, that's keeping me away from her, but I just can't simply do the same without knowing an answer: did she abandon us, or did we abandon her?

I tried asking her for the answer I was so torn up about, an answer that should be obvious, but she refused to give me an answer. You know, thinking about it, it makes sense that she didn't answer to the point this heavy feeling in my chest feels unreasonable. I mean why would she give me an answer? I've been cold and ruthless to her, partly because of all the peer pressure and partly because of my need to distance myself from her after all the hurt she caused, so why would she answer me of all people? I threatened her to keep her and her influence away from my life, and I even occasionally joined in on, albeit always indirectly, mental torture towards her in an effort to just get something out of her, for her to speak up. But I ended up taking things way too far over the years and let things I know I shouldn't have let happen, and she just took it all, not uttering a single word. I feel like such an ass.

And I asked the question so out of the blue as well to the point that it was rude. She looked like she was about to cry - I still hate seeing her cry. But I still couldn't help feeling ... lost after what happened, couldn't help that something was taken away from me. We almost could have forged a friendship again. I said I missed her earlier that day. As embarrassing as that moment, what I said was true. She looked so lost in my former playroom - she calls it the Lost Room, but I always knew exactly where I was going, I swear - but anyway, she looked so much like her old self that I couldn't help but say what I said, as embarrassing as it was. I _missed_ her.

How we found each other at that certain spot was a bit funny as well. I somehow just had the feeling she was gonna find herself there. But thinking that, why did I decide to come then? And I held her hand back there too. Hearing her say she missed me and feeling her warmth made me feel so ... comforted for the first time in years. She offered to fix things through talking. She offered to be friends again. And I accepted. I don't know if was being honest, but then again, I don't know if I was being entirely honest either. But the thought of her calling me Len-chan, as embarrassing and inaccurate the name is - makes me smile.

But I was selfish about our attempt to start anew, and I needed to know. Why couldn't I just trust her? I brought up things I know she was uncomfortable about, and I feel like such a fool for thinking she would answer.

But looking back on what she said ... she said that I had already made my own conclusion she didn't want to alter. Was that truly just a way to avoid an unfortunate truth or was she completely confident that the conclusion I made was the right one? And talking about that, what is exactly is my conclusion about her? Is she the bitch my brain depicts her as? Or is she the friend my heart sees her as?

Looking at what is now her residence once again, I conjure up a smile, and make my conclusion. Despite everything that happened, she really is still my girl next door. But I won't hold her into a stereotype. She may or may not be the kind, considerate, supportive girl I know. She may or may not truly know the real me, and I may or may not know the true her. I may or may not fall in love with her and start a life with her - though the thought does make me happy. All I know for sure is that she's Rin Kagamine, my girl next door, the girl who'd always there in my life, whether I'd like her to be or not.

But with that knowledge, if I were given the chance to rebuild my relationship with her again, would I take the opportunity? I guess my answer's simple. Yes.

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><p>Len monologue. Just to cure that cliffhanger from before. Hope you enjoyed. Following chapter is an Author's Note that I recommend everyone to read.<p> 


	16. Author's Note

**Author's Note**

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><p>Hello everyone, sorry for the yearlong absence, and that cliffhanger to boot! To both the new and old readers out there, I'd like to thank you for reading my series.<p>

But after all this time, I'm sorry to say that Memories of a Girl is in most definite hiatus, with a slim chance of clear completion as I am no longer even part of the Vocaloid fandom no longer. I'm sorry for all the dedicated readers if you're still out there that supported and invested themselves to this series, only to get it cancelled in the end. I enjoyed your presence and this fanfiction was such a fun time of my life where I grew so much. All the reviews I received and people I met were not my original expectation when I started this project, mainly out of fun and boredom. But honestly, the 150+ chapter was definitely too restricting for me to take, and I eventually got bored of my own creations, leading to the cancellation of the series. The community here sure has changed since I left, but I just wanted to leave you with a last chapter to thank you for what this project has become and to ease the abrupt end I previously left. That Len monologue was unfortunately the last, a final memento of my departure.

**That being said though, I'm still gonna keep this fanfiction up in case I ever want to ever return to it sometime in the future (unlikely though to be honest) if I ever reflect on my past. Also, for those of those who are curious at what ends up happening to the characters of this series, feel free to PM me, and I'll give a very in depth description of Link and a collective description on the happenings of the other 4 stories which I had planned, including where all the characters all end up in the conclusion. I'll answer any question you have left, and I sincerely apologize once again for the end of this series.**

Still, feel free to PM me even if you just wanna discuss anything. I feel so thankful for this experience and is still very open to discussion on any topics. For any of those who are curious on what I've been doing for the past year and what I will continue on doing, I actually still write, only I no longer write fiction. Now I'm part of the staff of an amazing and large K-pop site, writing under my real name. For anyone interested in K-pop, my new passion, and wants to check out the site and my writing, again email or PM me and I'll give you the link if you can't already guess the site I'm talking about. We focus on editorials and objective articles focusing on K-pop and Korean pop culture in general, and we welcome all fans to involve themselves though joining discussions with fellow fans.

Once again, I'm sorry for cutting this story short, but I thank those who've been supporting me since the very beginning. Memories of a Girl will always be a part of my memory, and I'll never forget it!

Until next time,

TsundereMe


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